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Today, I waited in line at Subway. There were two people in front of me. The first lady had seven sandwiches and the second lady had four. So after patiently waiting, I ordered my sandwich, only to have my credit card declined. FML

#13453945
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23523) - you deserved it (11283)

On 10/15/2010 at 12:06am - misc - by bcf1234 (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend picked me up from school. It was an unusually sweet gesture from him, and I was flattered. That is, until he told me to sit my ass in the back, so his dog could ride in front with him. FML

#20082214
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23523) - you deserved it (4457)

On 09/21/2012 at 3:10pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my brother and I had a long argument. He believes wholeheartedly that pineapples are not actually fruits, but berries. When I showed him a google search, he accused me of "faking" it. FML

#21410455
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23525) - you deserved it (3487)

On 05/15/2015 at 9:58am - misc - by Anon - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I had to explain to my brother why he can't go on dates with my new boyfriend and me. FML

#19469205
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23521) - you deserved it (2318)

On 04/14/2012 at 10:21pm - misc - by ProsserBabe11 (woman) - United States

Today, the mall got evacuated while I was getting my hair colored. I am now standing outside of a crowded mall, wearing a showercap. FML

#19833601
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23518) - you deserved it (2712)

On 06/23/2012 at 11:11am - misc - by tylah - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my older brother thought it would be hilarious to sneak up and scare me in the grocery aisle at the store. I screamed and jumped, knocking half the shelf's contents all over the floor. We're now banned from the only grocery store in town. FML

#20166242
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23518) - you deserved it (2901)

On 11/17/2012 at 1:42am - misc - by sarahhbear - United States (Texas)

Today, I spotted a girl I have a crush on while grocery shopping. Before I could go over and say hi, I noticed her walk over and stroke a few kitchen knives through plastic wrapping. Then I spotted her in the dog food section sniffing rawhide bones with her eyes closed, looking very happy. FML

#20165046
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23517) - you deserved it (3055)

On 11/16/2012 at 12:58am - misc - by grocerystalker (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I scratched my cornea and have to wear a large bandage covering my eye. I'm off today, but I'll probably have to wear it to school tomorrow. FML

#756
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23513) - you deserved it (5419)

On 11/12/2008 at 10:01pm - health - by - Sent from mobile version

Today, while in heavy traffic on the highway, a motorcyclist managed to t-bone my car. He picked himself up, glanced at the side of my car, and quickly drove off, all in the space of a few seconds. I just got an expensive paint job on this thing. FML

#17778728
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23512) - you deserved it (2759)

On 09/19/2011 at 4:35am - money - by Anonymous (man) - Malaysia (Kuala Lumpur)

Today, after finalizing my divorce, I decided to go out with a guy I had been ogling for months, after much anticipation and a few rounds of drinks at the bar, I was ready to roll. Much to my disappointment, his penis was so small the condom wouldn't stay on. FML

#8741180
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23512) - you deserved it (7581)

On 03/01/2010 at 2:30am - intimacy - by Lovejunkie (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, it was my 2 year anniversary with my boyfriend. As we were about to exchange gifts, he got a call and said he had to go home immediately. What was the emergency? His guild leader couldn't find another healer to finish a raid and promised my boyfriend gear if he would step up. FML

#20120587
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23510) - you deserved it (4381)

On 10/17/2012 at 1:16am - love - by Marie (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I told my boyfriend I loved him. He responded by fist pumping. FML

#19641486
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23509) - you deserved it (5012)

On 05/18/2012 at 11:05am - love - by Great. (woman) - United States (Montana)

Today, my boss asked me if he could pay me in gum. Thinking he was playing around, I agreed. He wasn't playing around. FML

#19921973
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23509) - you deserved it (9166)

On 07/11/2012 at 1:29am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)



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