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Today, my grandmother gave me a sex talk on how I should take "precautions", right in the middle of a packed bus station. I'm 21. FML

#8290111
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16606) - you deserved it (1831)

On 02/15/2010 at 5:02am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Lincolnshire)

Today, I realized something: when other people are drunk, they dance around and make out with people. When I'm drunk, I apparently think it's a great idea to chew on electrical cords. FML

#20429355
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16606) - you deserved it (27924)

On 12/29/2012 at 2:30am - misc - by almostkilledmyself - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, I was coming home from a date, I saw my ex standing in my drive-way. He had dumped me 2 months ago saying he couldn't talk me. To make him jealous, I made out with my new guy before greeting him. Turns out he couldn't talk to me because he had had cancer and had been afraid to tell me. FML

#3469762
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16600) - you deserved it (70981)

On 07/04/2009 at 12:38am - misc - by Foster_Em - United States (Ohio)

Today, I decided to make home made french fries. I figured all I needed was potatoes and salt, right? Wrong! I also needed the fire department and an ambulance. FML

#17934685
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16600) - you deserved it (24111)

On 10/08/2011 at 11:36am - misc - by anonymous - Sri Lanka

Today, I was in the elevator with my boss, when I let rip the vilest, most horrifying fart of my life as we left the first floor. We stood in silence as the elevator slowly ascended to the 21st floor, leaving us to marinate in the fumes. FML

#16516164
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16599) - you deserved it (41384)

On 06/05/2011 at 4:45pm - misc - by - United States

Today, while at Wendy's with my boyfriend, I realized that he made more pleasure sounds when eating his Baconator than he did while sleeping with me. FML

#6009820
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16591) - you deserved it (4724)

On 10/26/2009 at 5:34pm - intimacy - by FYLyfer (woman) - United States

Today, I was walking up some stairs, and I told the guy in front of me to be careful, as the handrail was loose and well-worn. I then put my hand on it, and promptly fell backwards down the stairs with a piece of handrail still in my hand. FML

#19651744
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16589) - you deserved it (5556)

On 05/20/2012 at 1:11pm - misc - by taob (woman) - China (Guangxi)

Today, I had a headache when I woke up for school. I had final exams that day, so I took what I thought were 2 advils. They were two sleeping pills. FML

#13837654
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16588) - you deserved it (23082)

On 11/14/2010 at 4:34am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I got an acceptance later to a great boarding school in India for my senior year of high school. I sent them a letter telling them I wouldn't go, because I just got back with my ex-boyfriend. I just got a text from my boyfriend. Guess who's my ex again? FML

#2344396
417 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16587) - you deserved it (109384)

On 05/27/2009 at 4:12pm - love - by tarini (woman) - Bangladesh (Dhaka)

Today, while drinking at a bar with my girlfriend, my ex-girlfriend who I've been seeing on the side walked straight up to her, introducing herself as "the ex-girlfriend that he's been sleeping with for the past 3 months." FML

Today, we went out to dinner to a family restaurant, and I was wearing a skirt since it's so warm out. My 4 year old scooted under the table to sit next to his brother. When he popped up on the other side, he exclaimed, "Mommy! You forgot to put on your underwears!" People were staring. FML

#2140359
217 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16586) - you deserved it (58529)

On 05/21/2009 at 8:45am - kids - by whoopsiedoodle (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I finally found the jewelry my two-year-old son had lost when it got lodged in my foot. FML

#19526699
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16586) - you deserved it (2178)

On 04/25/2012 at 10:33am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was warning a girl in my art class to be careful with a Stanley knife, as she had managed to cut her finger quite badly. Just as I said it, I sliced my finger open with a Stanley knife. FML

#19311735
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16584) - you deserved it (9253)

On 03/20/2012 at 12:33am - health - by insightful - Australia



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