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Wednesday 11 September 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my sister came out of her room sobbing uncontrollably. When I asked what was wrong, she put her fingers in my face and asked if they smelled like pickles, and if "that's normal for girls". They did. It's not. FML

#20880468
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42375) - you deserved it (3157)

On 09/14/2013 at 1:42am - health - by Carebeareatu (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, in French class we had to write love letters as an exercise. Since my boyfriend recently broke up with me by text message, I ended up writing a 20-sentence love letter in French to my cat. FML

#20878541
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42368) - you deserved it (3853)

On 09/12/2013 at 5:24pm - love - by Frenchie - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was home alone and heard the kitchen tap turn on. Shocked, I turned it off. It continuously kept turning itself on so I set my video phone on it to find out the cause. My cat has learnt to turn it on. I later found said cat teaching another. I have three cats. All my taps are like this. FML

Today, I asked my girlfriend to marry me. She pretended like it never happened. FML

Today, I told my boyfriend I loved him. He told me he was a dinosaur. FML

#20883504
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42054) - you deserved it (5363)

On 09/16/2013 at 7:09am - love - by Kit (woman) - United Kingdom (Swindon)

Today, I walked in the bathroom to find my son cleaning his penis. It wouldn't have been so bad if he wasn't cleaning it with a toothbrush. FML

#20883448
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42038) - you deserved it (3843)

On 09/16/2013 at 3:51am - kids - by clean - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was walking down the street when a "homeless" man asked for money. I gave him a dollar and he got up and called his friend on an iPhone. FML

#20879472
167 comments

Today, I had a dream in which I was playing tennis. As I hit a powerful serve, I suddenly woke up due to having slapped myself in the face. FML

#20875790
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41866) - you deserved it (6149)

On 09/10/2013 at 2:44pm - misc - by Grand Slam (man) - Belgium (Vlaams-Brabant)

Today, my son asked me if slavery was ever abolished. He's 19. FML

#20883742
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41603) - you deserved it (6698)

On 09/16/2013 at 1:42pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I noticed that my car's passenger-side door has cobwebs all over it. FML

#20876882
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41577) - you deserved it (6512)

On 09/11/2013 at 10:16am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, the Internet wasn't working. One girl decided to try to diagnose the problem. It said to connect the Ethernet cable. She started making fun of the computer for spelling "Internet" wrong. I'm graduating with this idiot in less than a month. FML

#20886445
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41442) - you deserved it (2804)

On 09/18/2013 at 10:57am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, after growing my hair out for over a year and constantly being told that it makes me look like a girl, I finally cut it. The first thing my friends said when they saw me was that I now look like a "lesbian." FML

#20874059
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41380) - you deserved it (5280)

On 09/09/2013 at 2:42am - misc - by jessel_ladd92 (man) - United States

Today, at my boyfriend's brother's house, I desperately needed to poop. After finishing my business, I realized the toilet wouldn't flush. I had to pull my poop out, wrap it in TP and make an excuse to go outside to throw it in a bush. The neighbor was watching. FML

#20874714
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41054) - you deserved it (11016)

On 09/09/2013 at 6:05pm - misc - by heyhijello - United States (California)



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