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Sunday 24 March 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I learned that my parents are planning to divorce. My dad said, "I'll take Rachel." Rachel isn't even his daughter; I am. Rachel is my mom's daughter with her first husband. FML

#20567711
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40328) - you deserved it (2695)

On 03/31/2013 at 12:14am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I went on a blind date that my friend set up for me. It was going pretty good, then he said he was going to go out to smoke. 10 minutes went by and he still hadn't come back. I called my friend and she said he doesn't smoke. FML

#20566826
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40264) - you deserved it (3944)

On 03/30/2013 at 11:29am - misc - by My Life Is Just PERFECT - United States

Today, I finally got the courage to tell the girl I like how I really feel about her, due in no small part to how flirty she's been towards me lately. Turns out she's really just a skank and was trying to make my best friend "jealous". He's gay. FML

#20553905
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40221) - you deserved it (4034)

On 03/21/2013 at 4:43pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, my boyfriend tried to whimsically serenade me by throwing rocks at my apartment window and singing. He got the wrong window. Another guy answered, and now he thinks I'm cheating on him. FML

#20559286
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40187) - you deserved it (3187)

On 03/25/2013 at 10:48am - love - by Faaccckkk (woman) - United States

Today, I realized how badly medical education has ruined me when I couldn't enjoy erotic literature because of one subtle anatomy mistake the author made. FML

#20565229
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40094) - you deserved it (8863)

On 03/29/2013 at 10:19am - intimacy - by notagyno - Romania (Bucuresti)

Today, I told my husband that a guy I work with told me that I'm the most beautiful woman he has ever met. My husband replied, "He needs to get out more." FML

Today, while I was at work, I was on the verge of tears. My coworker asked what was wrong and I explained that I recently had to put my dog down. He then replied, "Cool story, bro. Tell it again." FML

#20565029
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39965) - you deserved it (3459)

On 03/29/2013 at 4:23am - work - by CoolStoryBro -

Today, my daughter got selected to pick music for a funeral. She only listens to Nikki Minaj. FML

#20560709
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39559) - you deserved it (5544)

On 03/26/2013 at 7:40am - kids - by bear - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was feeling a bit insecure about my body, and I told my boyfriend I don't know how he can even stand to have sex with me. He replied, "I know, right?" FML

#20555435
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39430) - you deserved it (18622)

On 03/22/2013 at 7:21pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I decided to turn my life around and start exercising more. I didn't even make it out the door before I tripped and fractured my ankle. FML

#20550992
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39419) - you deserved it (4576)

On 03/19/2013 at 3:35pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend, who moved in about a month ago, decided he wanted to move back out. Why? Because I don't keep my place clean enough for him. This, coming from the same man who refuses to wash or clean anything because "that's what women are for." FML

#20560431
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39345) - you deserved it (9813)

On 03/26/2013 at 12:15am - love - by ShouldBeSingleSoon (woman) - United States (Nebraska)

Today, I bought an expensive razor that's supposed to be great. My roommate asked if she could borrow it, and as her legs just looked like they needed touching up, I said sure. After a strangely long amount of time, she came back, thanked me and left. Her legs were still hairy. FML

#20557395
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39336) - you deserved it (12618)

On 03/24/2013 at 1:30am - misc - by bleach (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, my dad came out of jail. He showed me his tattoo of a bible on his chest with all his 13 kids' names on it. I'm the only one whose name is spelled wrong. FML

#20554618
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39122) - you deserved it (2924)

On 03/22/2013 at 1:41am - misc - by XoxoChula - United States



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