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Sunday 3 February 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I had to drive to my workplace in blizzard conditions. Now that my 12 hour shift is over, I can't get out of the building, as the snow has blown into large drifts in front of the doors. I have to stay overnight until my next 12 hour shift. FML

Today, my boyfriend gave me the most beautiful diamond ring I have ever seen. As I excitedly put it on my finger, he told me it wasn't an engagement ring, but I should wear it like one to keep other men away and seem "unapproachable". FML

#20488292
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31720) - you deserved it (4108)

On 01/31/2013 at 10:35pm - love - by whatsername92 (woman) - United States

Today, I gave my 5-year-old daughter a unicorn pillow pet. She ended up giving him an ill-advised name, and has been loudly proclaiming to everyone she sees that her pillow pet is Horny. FML

#20499722
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31612) - you deserved it (4381)

On 02/09/2013 at 3:03pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I learned that my big, tough, strong dog is terrified of spiders when he jumped, knocked over a table and then peed on the spider to drown it. FML

#20495511
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31603) - you deserved it (4449)

On 02/06/2013 at 8:59am - animals - by DogLover (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I finally figured out why I've been getting diarrhea so often over the past six months. It only happens whenever I do something "sneaky". My body reacts strongly to how I stress over potentially getting caught. I'm a private investigator, and I apparently need a new career. FML

#20500655
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31365) - you deserved it (3790)

On 02/10/2013 at 5:41am - work - by screwed - United States

Today, I found out my best friend has been stealing hundreds of dollars from me and my fiancé. My wedding is tomorrow morning. Guess who my best man is. FML

#20483262
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31318) - you deserved it (2528)

On 01/28/2013 at 4:01pm - love - by weddingsalwayssuck - United States (New York)

Today, I discovered the true meaning of being scared shitless. My father in a clown costume emerged from my closet. Needless to say something emerged from me. FML

Today, my roommate found an eviction notice on our door for unpaid rent. Our apartment building caught fire and we haven't been living there for well over a month because it was legally unlivable. Today was our first day back. FML

#20500469
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31272) - you deserved it (1884)

On 02/10/2013 at 1:08am - money - by fireenginemad - United States (Washington)

Today, my son threw the biggest fit in history about going to the dentist. He broke a whole stack of plates, overflowed the bathtub, let the dog loose, and kicked his father when he tried to calm him down. My son is 17. FML

#20495428
230 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31255) - you deserved it (33067)

On 02/06/2013 at 6:12am - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my 5-year-old nephew had the most amazing idea: to play a game with my keys. He took out all ten keys individually and hid them around the house. So far it's been two hours and I haven't found a single one. FML

#20485810
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31239) - you deserved it (3664)

On 01/30/2013 at 2:03am - kids - by idislikeblanks (man) - United States (California)

Today, my manager asked me for the password to my Internet so she could Skype family since she can't pay her bill. This is the same woman who just a week ago tried to evict me because my rent was an hour late. Trying to be the bigger person, I gave her the password. She changed my password. FML

#20496640
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31087) - you deserved it (16397)

On 02/07/2013 at 1:20am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, I asked my bosses for three weeks off in July to go on a much-needed vacation. Their response was to fire me on the spot. My bosses are my aunt and uncle. FML

#20489213
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30929) - you deserved it (3541)

On 02/01/2013 at 5:13pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - Romania (Cluj)

Today, I hired out a motel room so I could stay there by myself and lie to my mother and grandmother about having friends. This is the third time. FML

#20492687
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30858) - you deserved it (13849)

On 02/04/2013 at 2:45am - love - by lonelyloser - Australia (Western Australia)



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