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Saturday 12 January 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my husband and I finally agreed on something: marriage counseling. FML

#20455127
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26987) - you deserved it (5665)

On 01/12/2013 at 10:28am - love - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, while living in Florida, I had a conversation with my mother explaining that it might be best for me to come back home. Her response, "Don't worry, they have plenty of homeless shelters down there if you need a place to stay." Thanks Mom. FML

#20458436
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26976) - you deserved it (3267)

On 01/14/2013 at 1:51am - misc - by living_thedream (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I was reading a book in bed when my dad came to check whether or not I was asleep. To avoid any conversation, I pretended that I was. Turns out he was just checking whether he and my mom could have sex while I was fast asleep. I couldn't plug my ears in time. FML

#20468586
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26861) - you deserved it (8917)

On 01/19/2013 at 9:55pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada

Today, I came out to my parents. They laughed in my face. FML

#20445704
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26617) - you deserved it (5997)

On 01/07/2013 at 1:09am - misc - by areyoukiddingme (woman) - United States

Today, after recently breaking up with my boyfriend, I unknowingly washed my laundry using his washing tabs. My whole wardrobe now smells like my ex. FML

#20467750
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26603) - you deserved it (15695)

On 01/19/2013 at 11:50am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Warwickshire)

Today, at an open mic comedy club, my jokes went down so poorly that someone decided to hurl a chair at me on-stage. FML

#20466782
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26510) - you deserved it (14123)

On 01/18/2013 at 7:26pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - Iceland

Today, I got home only to discover my dog was missing. After spending ages roaming the freezing streets calling his name, I returned to find him stuck behind the couch with my chewed-up new shoes in his muzzle. FML

#20447616
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26372) - you deserved it (5837)

On 01/08/2013 at 5:40am - animals - by Coldandshoeless (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my wife has the flu, while I have strep throat. We have a two-year-old toddler and have no clue as to who's more contagious and who should take care of her as to not get her sick. Yay for the entire day of surgical masks and Sesame Street. FML

#20448554
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26349) - you deserved it (2329)

On 01/08/2013 at 7:26pm - health - by Curly (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my mom wished me "Happy Conception Day." FML

#20462817
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25812) - you deserved it (4007)

On 01/16/2013 at 4:08pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my roommate came back drunk from rushing fraternities. Normally I wouldn't have minded, had he not immediately pissed and thrown up everywhere after entering the room. If only I had moved my guitar and the suitcase full of clothes I had left out after returning from break. FML

Today, I was walking my dog when he decided that he was too lazy to continue walking. It ended up with me looking like a crazy dog lady carrying my medium-sized dog home. FML

#20448490
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25698) - you deserved it (4616)

On 01/08/2013 at 6:56pm - animals - by life// (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, after a very heartfelt conversation with my mother, I promised her that I'd quit smoking. I walked in on her smoking my cigarettes an hour later. Her excuse was that she didn't want my money to have gone to waste. FML

#20468389
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25435) - you deserved it (3551)

On 01/19/2013 at 7:46pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom

Today, the girl of my dreams asked me if I wanted to go biking with her. "Just the two of us," she said. I had to turn her down because I'm 17 years old and never learned how to ride a bike. FML

#20457168
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25314) - you deserved it (34254)

On 01/13/2013 at 1:25pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)



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