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Friday 7 December 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I went on a blind date. My date turned out to be very hot, and I had high hopes. That is, until she ran her hand through her hair as she approached, sending some kind of horrifying, miasmic mist of dandruff and dead skin floating through the air behind her. FML

#20197946
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16948) - you deserved it (6444)

On 12/09/2012 at 4:52pm - love - by HOLY SHIT, A WALKING SNOWGLOBE (man) - United Kingdom (Barking and Dagenham)

Today, while I was at a urinal, a man came up to use the one next to me. He then said, "I guess this is where all the dicks hang out." He then stared at me until I left. FML

#20190054
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16720) - you deserved it (1263)

On 12/03/2012 at 9:14pm - misc - by reedcarter -

Today, I got punched in the face after a stranger asked for a light, didn't realize it was a butane lighter and burnt the tip of his nose lighting his cigarette. Now my nose looks worse than his. FML

#20193519
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16584) - you deserved it (2748)

On 12/06/2012 at 6:30am - misc - by chinousmc - United States (Florida)

Today, I was yelled at by a customer, who was upset over having waited twenty minutes for a waiter to come take her order. Maybe it would be understandable, if she was sitting in an actual restaurant, and not a serve-yourself coffee house. FML

#20194179
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16570) - you deserved it (824)

On 12/06/2012 at 6:50pm - work - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I bought some expensive fabric softener since I'm not too keen on my detergent's smell. Only after washing two weeks worth of laundry did I discover that mixed together they realistically mimic the smell of fresh puke. FML

#20189162
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16294) - you deserved it (3116)

On 12/03/2012 at 6:40am - misc - by backtothelaundrettethen (woman) - Germany

Today, while getting a hernia exam, I accidentally ran my fingers through my doctor's hair. FML

#20188881
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15396) - you deserved it (5595)

On 12/03/2012 at 12:06am - health - by WTFFAIL (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I had to show my husband a video on how to brush your teeth. FML

#20188897
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15322) - you deserved it (2201)

On 12/03/2012 at 12:18am - health - by Gahh... (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I sent an email to my boss saying I'd fixed a glitch in our mail servers. He called me later, angrily shouting that I'd done a piss-poor job of fixing it, because my email had spammed his inbox with several hundred duplicate messages. FML

#20399685
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15149) - you deserved it (9571)

On 12/14/2012 at 6:16pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Somerset)

Today, after weeks of begging, I finally got an interview at my dream job. Turns out, they only agreed to interview me because they thought I was someone else. FML

Today, I walked into school confident about the new hair color I'd had done over the weekend. My drama teacher apparently dyed her hair the same color; everyone noticed and thought I'd copied her. FML

#20190350
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14370) - you deserved it (1302)

On 12/04/2012 at 12:01am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I bought my son a nice car for his 18th birthday. When I gave it to him, he just got mad and told me that if I really wanted to spend that much money on him, I should've used it to help him pay for college. FML

#20192045
269 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12969) - you deserved it (45152)

On 12/05/2012 at 6:27am - kids - by Anonymous - Israel

Today, my boss was telling everyone that he knew a guy who went to a college at which multiple people were shot and killed recently. Being extremely socially awkward and uncomfortable, I blurted, "That's awesome." Now everyone in the office is terrified of me. FML

#20191114
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10853) - you deserved it (20891)

On 12/04/2012 at 4:34pm - work - by Adan - United States (Washington)

Today, during a conversation, my boss said, "What, what?" Before I could stop myself, I replied, "In the butt." FML

#20191552
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9722) - you deserved it (19805)

On 12/04/2012 at 9:43pm - work - by whitecollar - United Kingdom (York)



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