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Saturday 24 November 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I had some soup that my dad made. I took one sip and found he had put tons of hot sauce in it. I rushed to drink from a soda can sitting on the counter, only to find that my mom had used it as an ash tray the night before. I can still taste the hot sauce, and the ash. FML

#20179829
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24099) - you deserved it (2772)

On 11/26/2012 at 3:13pm - misc - by Autocorrected - Philippines (Manila)

Today, I brought a boy over to my house to help with a history project. My mom suddenly swooped in and bombarded him with questions about his and my sex life, and how she wants to have exactly four grandchildren. FML

#20186150
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23878) - you deserved it (1804)

On 12/01/2012 at 1:06am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend dumped me by throwing my stuff out of his place, and accusing me of cheating while yelling, "Cheater, cheater! Pumpkin eater!" When I tried explaining that I have no clue what he's talking about, he started exclaiming, "Liar, liar! Pants on fire!" FML

#20180296
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23810) - you deserved it (2903)

On 11/26/2012 at 8:41pm - love - by imnotacheateryouimmaturefuck (woman) - United States (California)

Today, after being single for a while now, I unwillingly went on a blind date with a guy my friend convinced me would be perfect for me. He took me to McDonald's; his father was with him the whole entire time. He is 27. FML

#20180462
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23782) - you deserved it (1952)

On 11/26/2012 at 10:13pm - love - by N - Denmark (Hovedstaden)

Today, while working at my local supermarket, I found a boy lost and wandering about, so I took him to the front desk. My reward from his mother was a slap around the face and harsh words for supposedly having kidnapped him. FML

#20183959
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23629) - you deserved it (1488)

On 11/29/2012 at 1:08pm - work - by bitch i'm a gerontophile (man) - Taiwan

Today, I heard a teenage boy ask his friend, "So, is it, like, November in Australia too?" This is the future of America. FML

#20179140
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23461) - you deserved it (2343)

On 11/26/2012 at 12:27am - kids - by toritoratora - United States (California)

Today, I went out and bought a copy of Black Ops 2. I got home and opened the case, only to see the game disk was missing. When I went back to the store to complain, the guy at the desk accused me of trying to pull an old scam on him. FML

#20175155
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23414) - you deserved it (2306)

On 11/23/2012 at 12:20pm - money - by FUCK A FUCKING DUCK (man) - Bahamas (New Providence)

Today, while at school, a bra fell out of my coat. After the initial shock, people started congratulating me on finally getting a girlfriend. I didn't have the heart to tell them it was my mom's. FML

#20175088
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23259) - you deserved it (3239)

On 11/23/2012 at 10:56am - misc - by Tymer (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, as I was about to walk across the street, a girl in front of me who clearly wasn't paying attention to the traffic, almost got run over. I grabbed her arm and jumped back. She was fine. I fell and fractured my arm and wrist. FML

#20182568
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23186) - you deserved it (1954)

On 11/28/2012 at 12:43pm - health - by williebees - United States (Texas)

Today, I ran into an old friend, and she remarked how she couldn't believe we hadn't seen each other in a year. Except not only did I attend her baby shower a few weeks ago, I spent hundreds of dollars on a unique gift. FML

#20174439
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23153) - you deserved it (2374)

On 11/22/2012 at 9:49pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my cat went into labor. This is surprising since 6 years ago, we paid to have her spayed. FML

#20174337
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23084) - you deserved it (1650)

On 11/22/2012 at 8:34pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Alabama)

Today, my boss called me Dave. Now everyone actually thinks my name is Dave. It's Nathan. I've been working there for 2 years. FML

#20181011
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23017) - you deserved it (1948)

On 11/27/2012 at 8:16am - work - by nato (man) - United States

Today, my grandmother and I turned up to a family function wearing the same outfit. FML

#20184947
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22905) - you deserved it (5315)

On 11/30/2012 at 1:30am - misc - by Awks - Australia (Victoria)



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