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Friday 23 November 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I decided to go meet up with a guy that I met online for the first time. All he could talk about was how he expects me to "clean, cook, and submit" my body for sex at least twice a day when we get married. FML

#20173484
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22206) - you deserved it (5502)

On 11/22/2012 at 4:39am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my girlfriend looked me straight in the eye and said, "I know about the sea turtles." I asked her what she was talking about and she said, "Next time, shut up or I'll show you pain." I have no idea what she's talking about. FML

#20170012
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22029) - you deserved it (2066)

On 11/19/2012 at 8:15pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my boss asked me if I had any special plans for Christmas. After I told him I was planning a trip to Canada, he snapped, "Well, you can forget it. I need you at the office." FML

#20173791
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22024) - you deserved it (1481)

On 11/22/2012 at 12:35pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I told my boss that I quit, and handed in my two week's notice. A couple of hours later, I found my letter of resignation had been photocopied and copies hung all around the office with "Best day ever" written on the bottom. FML

#20176308
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21975) - you deserved it (4772)

On 11/24/2012 at 6:54am - work - by sad face - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I walked into my house with my friend, only to discover my husband half-naked and yelling at the TV screen over a soccer game. By half-naked, I mean he was only wearing a shirt. FML

#20169569
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21935) - you deserved it (2376)

On 11/19/2012 at 2:44pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my 5 kids were singing their favorite Christmas carols in the van, each trying to sing louder than the others. It would have probably sounded better if they were all singing the same one. FML

#20183806
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21754) - you deserved it (4077)

On 11/29/2012 at 9:22am - kids - by Dave (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I ran across the street due to a line of cars waiting for me to cross. Just as I reached the other side, my iPhone slipped out of my hand and fell into the road, just in time to get run over by multiple cars, one after the other. FML

#20181219
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21485) - you deserved it (6781)

On 11/27/2012 at 1:45pm - misc - by unknown - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, I have a final for my precalculus class. After hours of studying this week, I felt pretty optimistic. Until I got to class and realized that I'd forgotten my calculator. FML

#20172402
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21414) - you deserved it (6658)

On 11/21/2012 at 1:16pm - misc - by anonymous - United States (Arizona)

Today, my dad went through all the trouble of sneaking onto my laptop and photoshopping a bong into my Facebook profile picture, apparently just so he could win a €20 bet with my mom, that hinged on her grounding me by December. FML

#20178213
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21410) - you deserved it (1498)

On 11/25/2012 at 1:55pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Europe

Today, my cat peed on my bra. I didn't realize this until after I arrived at work for my 12-hour shift. Now I'm trying to wash my bra out in the sink and stuff paper towels down it to soak up the moisture. Only 10 more hours to go, and the smell of cat pee is still lingering. FML

#20185014
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21337) - you deserved it (4163)

On 11/30/2012 at 3:33am - work - by onlyslightly (woman) - United States

Today, a customer at the Walmart I work at had a hissy fit and began throwing merchandise everywhere, including at my face, because we are Canadian and don't have a show called "Extreme Couponing" for "devoted shoppers" like her. FML

#20181556
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21225) - you deserved it (1604)

On 11/27/2012 at 6:46pm - work - by ohgodwhy - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was woken up by my elderly neighbor banging on my door at 2am. She needed "urgent" assistance as she had forgotten how to turn her TV off. I'd just fallen asleep. FML

#20184989
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21082) - you deserved it (1621)

On 11/30/2012 at 2:29am - misc - by Rachael (woman) - Australia

Today, while working as a massage therapist, a client had me work on a very specific knot in his shoulder. He also happened to have a very detailed, very realistic tattoo of the crucifixion on his shoulder. I just spent 45 minutes violating Jesus. FML

#20173351
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21017) - you deserved it (3710)

On 11/22/2012 at 1:50am - work - by Anonymous - United States



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