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Thursday 22 November 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I woke up to a disappointed boyfriend. He told me he spent an hour last night farting on my pillow to see if I would wake up with pink-eye. He's 23 years old. FML

#20170920
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25591) - you deserved it (3064)

On 11/20/2012 at 12:23pm - love - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I had some soup that my dad made. I took one sip and found he had put tons of hot sauce in it. I rushed to drink from a soda can sitting on the counter, only to find that my mom had used it as an ash tray the night before. I can still taste the hot sauce, and the ash. FML

#20179829
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25520) - you deserved it (2928)

On 11/26/2012 at 3:13pm - misc - by Autocorrected - Philippines (Manila)

Today, I came home to my mother-in-law wearing the gold chain which I usually keep in a hidden drawer. I searched my drawer only to find out my chain was missing. I asked my mother-in-law if she took it and she keeps denying the fact that she stole it from me. My husband is on her side. FML

#20183636
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25495) - you deserved it (1486)

On 11/29/2012 at 3:01am - misc - by elizabeth - United States (Nevada)

Today, after being single for a while now, I unwillingly went on a blind date with a guy my friend convinced me would be perfect for me. He took me to McDonald's; his father was with him the whole entire time. He is 27. FML

#20180462
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25489) - you deserved it (1959)

On 11/26/2012 at 10:13pm - love - by N - Denmark (Hovedstaden)

Today, my cat went into labor. This is surprising since 6 years ago, we paid to have her spayed. FML

#20174337
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25479) - you deserved it (1821)

On 11/22/2012 at 8:34pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Alabama)

Today, I went to a restaurant with my boyfriend. After dessert, he went to the bathroom so I quickly called the waiter over and paid the bill, thinking it was a nice gesture. When he returned, he broke up with me for "emasculating" him. FML

#20180957
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25252) - you deserved it (4169)

On 11/27/2012 at 6:36am - love - by Clementine (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I ran into an old friend, and she remarked how she couldn't believe we hadn't seen each other in a year. Except not only did I attend her baby shower a few weeks ago, I spent hundreds of dollars on a unique gift. FML

#20174439
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25228) - you deserved it (2578)

On 11/22/2012 at 9:49pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, after almost four years of having avoided her due to her hatred of my husband, my mother invited us both to a family dinner. My husband wanted to give her another chance, so we went. Less than an hour after arriving, I caught her hocking a loogie and spitting it into our food. FML

#20182910
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25155) - you deserved it (1579)

On 11/28/2012 at 6:04pm - love - by some things never change (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, while at school, a bra fell out of my coat. After the initial shock, people started congratulating me on finally getting a girlfriend. I didn't have the heart to tell them it was my mom's. FML

#20175088
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25146) - you deserved it (3440)

On 11/23/2012 at 10:56am - misc - by Tymer (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my boss called me Dave. Now everyone actually thinks my name is Dave. It's Nathan. I've been working there for 2 years. FML

#20181011
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25141) - you deserved it (2135)

On 11/27/2012 at 8:16am - work - by nato (man) - United States

Today, I heard a teenage boy ask his friend, "So, is it, like, November in Australia too?" This is the future of America. FML

#20179140
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25039) - you deserved it (2475)

On 11/26/2012 at 12:27am - kids - by toritoratora - United States (California)

Today, I was working the dart game at my local amusement park when a couple paid to play. They were highly intoxicated, and they thought the object of the game was to hit me with the darts. FML

Today, whilst at a red light in my car, a homeless man with a spray bottle and a dirty rag came over to clean my windows. He started with the driver's window, which was wide open, and whatever was in his spray bottle smelled suspiciously like urine. FML

#20172058
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24942) - you deserved it (1958)

On 11/21/2012 at 4:54am - misc - by WamBamSam - United Kingdom (Worcestershire)



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