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Tuesday 30 October 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I was woken up by my husband attempting to breastfeed off my lactating nipples. FML

#20139029
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25601) - you deserved it (3147)

On 10/29/2012 at 6:22pm - misc - by Indianagirl94 (woman) - United States

Today, I was planning on enjoying my one day off work from the hospital, at home. I got a call saying I had to come in because my department was short-handed. I went in to find almost everyone there. Turns out it was a prank by my coworkers. FML

#20148851
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25561) - you deserved it (1694)

On 11/05/2012 at 12:33pm - work - by Anonymous - Australia

Today, I'm so broke, I asked my parents if they'd pay for me to go to the eye doctor and consider it my Christmas present. FML

#20149436
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25378) - you deserved it (2268)

On 11/05/2012 at 8:01pm - money - by EB - United States

Today, my company had a Halloween party. I was so excited seeing as our company never does anything, so I pulled out all the stops with my costume. I was the only one who got dressed up. FML

#20144153
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25247) - you deserved it (3462)

On 11/02/2012 at 8:17am - work - by PieterseMJ - South Africa (Gauteng)

Today, after weeks of wondering if my cat has a fetish for licking my bed covers, I finally witnessed him licking up an ant off of the covers. Turns out that my bed is infested with ants. FML

#20138030
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25135) - you deserved it (5110)

On 10/29/2012 at 12:23am - animals - by lifelike (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I'm at home, sick with walking pneumonia and a raging UTI. Every time I cough, I piss myself. I'm now having to lie on a bath towel and garbage bags until the meds kick in. FML

#20145285
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25019) - you deserved it (1616)

On 11/03/2012 at 1:34am - health - by jdch_99 - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I had surgery on my arm. My mom has recently had the same surgery and my dad is having his first rib removed and won't be able to move his arm. My family combined now has three functioning arms. FML

#20142449
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24999) - you deserved it (1749)

On 11/01/2012 at 1:08am - health - by Anonymous - United States (Arizona)

Today, my girlfriend and I were going through some troubles in our relationship, and she said to me, "No offense, but I really hope no other relationship I have in the future will be like this one." Some offense taken. FML

#20141147
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24998) - you deserved it (2988)

On 10/31/2012 at 12:22am - love - by anon (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my manager made me stay at work for an extra four hours, making me miss an urgent specialist appointment I'd scheduled months ago. Why? Because her neighbor's dog was having puppies, and she wanted to go home early and see them. FML

#20143987
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24899) - you deserved it (2624)

On 11/02/2012 at 1:53am - work - by whytetrash - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was cleaning out my roof's gutter, which was full of leaves. There was an especially big pile, and when I started scooping it up, I felt something squishy. Turns out those leaves were covering the remains of a rotting squirrel. I can't stop smelling it. FML

#20141617
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24436) - you deserved it (1833)

On 10/31/2012 at 1:23pm - animals - by orilykid (man) - United States (California)

Today, at archery practice, I jokingly said that I'd kiss the next person to get a bullseye. They all made a point of missing their targets, some even shooting their arrows way off to the side. FML

#20146224
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24228) - you deserved it (7546)

On 11/03/2012 at 8:19pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, before leaving my house, I OCD-checked all of my doors 16 times to make sure that they were locked. When I got home, my house had been broken into. Turns out I accidentally unlocked my front door when trying to lock it for the last time. This is why I have OCD. FML

#20141026
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24070) - you deserved it (9949)

On 10/30/2012 at 11:02pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, we got new seats in class today. The guy placed next to me, turned, looked me dead in the eye, and said, "The balls are the warmest place on the body" while his hands were in his pants. I'm stuck next to him for the rest of the semester. FML

#20140711
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23954) - you deserved it (1785)

On 10/30/2012 at 8:29pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)



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