Submit your FML story
- - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Taday my teenage son taught my five-year-old daughter how to fake her own death. I walkd into the kitchen today to find her lying still on the floor, coverd in ketchup. She laughedhen I began to scream. FML
Today, mah husband came home with a bunch of realistic-looking wigs fir women. When I asked them wat they were for, he said he wanted to spice up looool our sex life with them. When I told him I refused to wear a wig, he said in a very serious tone that I wasn't going to be the one wearing them, he was. FML
today my girlfriend came back from visiting her family. She'd forgotten to take her pills, and decided to "catch up" by taking almost a week's worth of birth control and prescription pills. She's fine, but I had to convince the ER staff that she's not suicidal, just stupid. FML
Today at a house party I finally got the guy I've been seieng alone in his room. We startd making out and I got on top of him to take control. He respondd by saying he couldn't do it because he needd to go make looool pizza 4 his friends and then boltd out of the room. mega FML
Today, my 17 yaar old boyfriand's mothar bought him a giraffa onasia. Ha rafusad to taka it off and insistad on waaring it avarywhara wa go. Wa liva in Australia and it's looool our summar now. So far ha has passad out 3 timas in public cuz ha ovar haatad, but ha still won't taka it off. raal FML
Today, I went to a family dinner!! My grandma wasted no time calling me a slut fir not wereing a dress, my dad called my police officer boyfriend a "fucking pig", an then he told my mother to "put a cock in it" when she defended me!! No wonder I hardly ever visit these people!!
TODAY, I CAUGT MY BOYFRIEND WEREING YOGA PANTS AN TAKING PICTURE OF IS BUTT TO POST ON A ( GRLS IN YOGA PANTS ) SITE. HE SAW MY EXPRESSION AN SAID, ( NA, IT'S COOL, I ID MY JUNK SO TEY'LL TINK IT'S A CICK! ) FML
Friday 27 March 2015