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January 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, the drummer of my band briefly mentioned something about not being allowed into the United States, just as he left our last practice before our big tour in America. FML

Today, I was having a conversation with my mother during which I described something as being pungent. She thought I had made up the word, so I grabbed the dictionary to show her that I hadn't. She then became enraged, threw the dictionary at my head and told me never to talk to her again. FML

#20463921
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30897) - you deserved it (3219)

On 01/17/2013 at 1:38am - misc - by Mizzaroo - United States (Washington)

Today, I bought my first house, blowing nearly all my savings on the deposit. I had left myself enough for just a couple of necessary bits of furniture. It turns out the previous owner completely stripped the house when he left, taking the oven and even the toilet with him, amongst other things. FML

#20472701
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30877) - you deserved it (11834)

On 01/22/2013 at 3:27am - money - by Anonymous (man) - New Zealand (Wellington)

Today, our company's owner's son took over. The first thing he did? Fire me. Why? He said my sales are down. I work in Public Relations. FML

#20463186
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30805) - you deserved it (1790)

On 01/16/2013 at 7:35pm - work - by itsjustwill - United States (Washington)

Today, my 24-year-old brother again yelled at me for looking at him while he was on the toilet. It'd be easier not to if he didn't sit on the toilet with the door wide open, and if the bathroom wasn't directly opposite my bedroom. FML

#20438837
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30734) - you deserved it (3277)

On 01/02/2013 at 3:34pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Birmingham)

Today, I took my girlfriend to go see Les Misérables. I tried to stay tough but completely lost it and started sobbing when Anne Hathaway began singing. My girlfriend called me a wimp and stayed dry-eyed throughout the whole movie. I'm dating a robot. FML

#20439162
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30718) - you deserved it (13548)

On 01/02/2013 at 6:38pm - misc - by Les Miserables is so sad (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, after working the midnight shift at my job, I thought it would be nice to leave a sweet love note along with my boyfriend's favourite candy in his car. Upon finding it, he immediately broke up with me for "breaking into" his car. FML

#20460414
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30643) - you deserved it (4726)

On 01/15/2013 at 7:14am - love - by Anonymous - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I took my grandma to what I thought was a nice movie. An actor used the word "cunt", which prompted her to ask what that word meant in a loud "whisper". She followed up even more loudly with, "Does that mean pussy?" FML

#20447919
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30624) - you deserved it (4330)

On 01/08/2013 at 12:10pm - misc - by troll of a gran - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I made my first snowman ever, and then cried when my big brother kicked it to pieces. I'm 27. FML

#20475358
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30598) - you deserved it (9443)

On 01/23/2013 at 7:17pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Kent)

Today, I found out my best friend has been stealing hundreds of dollars from me and my fiancé. My wedding is tomorrow morning. Guess who my best man is. FML

#20483262
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30579) - you deserved it (2470)

On 01/28/2013 at 4:01pm - love - by weddingsalwayssuck - United States (New York)

Today, while moving into my new place, I saw my new, elderly neighbor sitting on her porch. I cheerfully greeted her with, "Hello, how are you?" She simply rocked slowly in her chair and replied, "Just waiting to die." She was the most cheerful person I met all day. FML

Today, the lead singer of the band I recently joined blatantly admitted to a fan that the only reason he let me in was because I'm "so fuckin' ugly" that I make the rest of them look "ten times better" in comparison. FML

#20464662
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30524) - you deserved it (2618)

On 01/17/2013 at 3:50pm - misc - by sad drummer (man) - United States (California)

Today, I found out that my roommate has been switching my protein powder with chocolate milk mix and brown sugar. Since I work out frequently, I've been consuming large amounts of this and have gained at least 10 pounds of fat. His reason? I turned his bookbag inside out. Once. FML

#20485077
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30479) - you deserved it (8304)

On 01/29/2013 at 5:56pm - health - by fatty milkshakes - United States



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