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Today, it was my first day working as a pharmacist. I quickly discovered that customers not only think that it makes me qualified to offer free medical advice, but they also have no qualms about showing me their various lumps, bumps, and vaginal leakages. FML

#21377662
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (182) - you deserved it (3128)

On 03/19/2015 at 9:19am - work - by MyPoorEyes (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, while at the office, a surprise Valentine's gift arrived for me, the first I've ever received. It was a box of heart-shaped cookies. From my mother. I'm 39. FML

#21355623
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27519) - you deserved it (3127)

On 02/13/2015 at 10:49pm - love - by FMAhole - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I found out that my best friend is moving to Arkansas, and my girlfriend is going with him. FML

#12386734
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40046) - you deserved it (3126)

On 08/08/2010 at 4:49am - love - by LadyGagasLOVER (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my dad's work phone went off, and I thought I should go tell him since he's on call. Turns out no matter how you do it, a 47 year old man at one in the morning will think you are a burglar trying to attack him. FML

#16479065
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26850) - you deserved it (3126)

On 06/03/2011 at 2:25am - misc - by anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, my husband's recent obsession with The Sopranos since James Gandolfini died went a step further into the ridiculous, when he tried to encourage some ducks to land in our swimming pool by throwing loaves of bread into it, while bellowing at them with a 'Noo Joisey' Wise Guy accent. FML

#20770230
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31767) - you deserved it (3126)

On 07/08/2013 at 7:57am - misc - by Not Mrs Soprano (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, on my first day as a lifeguard, a man had a heart attack in the pool. I jumped in, pulled him out, and even went to the hospital with him. He seemed genuinely offended, saying "You should've let me die." FML

#21198585
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44716) - you deserved it (3126)

On 07/04/2014 at 3:04pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - Netherlands

Today, I flew across country to college. My luggage did not. FML

#21262400
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36556) - you deserved it (3126)

On 09/21/2014 at 11:51am - misc - by Need Clothes Now (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me telling me I have problems communicating and that I didn't understand her. When I asked her why she didn't talk to me about this before she said "I didn't want to talk about it." FML

#2987293
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50184) - you deserved it (3125)

On 06/18/2009 at 3:24am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)

Today, I woke up to my boyfriend pulling off scabs and eating them. My scabs. FML

#19448273
267 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37830) - you deserved it (3125)

On 04/11/2012 at 5:53am - health - by Scabby (woman) - United Kingdom (Manchester)

Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm. FML

#19594950
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32572) - you deserved it (3125)

On 05/08/2012 at 10:05pm - intimacy - by laury - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was leaning over cleaning a table at work, when my pretty coworker came up behind me and slapped me on the butt. I was so startled that I slipped and smashed my face into the table. Now she can't look at me without laughing. FML

#20430634
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27662) - you deserved it (3125)

On 12/29/2012 at 8:01pm - work - by nose hurts (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my first date in years cancelled on me because she has to "wash the horse's hair." The date was arranged for 9:30pm. FML

#20857695
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38377) - you deserved it (3125)

On 08/28/2013 at 9:25am - misc - by AtLeastHaveADecientExcuse -

Today, I went skiing. On the first run of the day, a little girl came out of nowhere and crashed into me. I was fine, but she was hurt, so I called the ski patrol. She told him that I deliberately hit her, and got me kicked out. I was there for 10 minutes. I paid for all day. FML

#21010566
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45159) - you deserved it (3125)

On 12/30/2013 at 3:28pm - health - by bad luck skier - United States (New York)



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