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Monday 26 March 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I got into my car and it wouldn't start. I noticed I had left the lights on and assumed the battery was dead. Then, I couldn't get my key out of the ignition. So, I called AAA only to have the guy put my car in park and start the engine. FML

#19386625
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4726) - you deserved it (20454)

On 04/01/2012 at 2:44am - misc - by oooooopss - United States (Oregon)

Today, I was not yet wearing my bouncer uniform when a fight broke out at a club. I intervened, only to have the cops who showed up tase me because they thought I was part of it. FML

#19353440
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16765) - you deserved it (2846)

On 03/26/2012 at 8:17pm - work - by ramis182 - United States (Washington)

Today, my best friend stopped by my house, borrowed a movie, and left. That was the extent of our communication for the day. Today is my birthday. FML

#19355231
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21099) - you deserved it (1416)

On 03/27/2012 at 12:27am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, in the midst of sleep, my boyfriend hurled my cellphone across the room and into the wall because he couldn't be bothered to pick up or hang up an incoming call. FML

#19395712
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13325) - you deserved it (2060)

On 04/02/2012 at 3:42pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, while playing badminton, I was so distracted by my ex winking at me that I didn't notice the shuttle cock that hit me in the eye. FML

#19375546
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5953) - you deserved it (13740)

On 03/30/2012 at 10:35am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom

Today, a guy in a fancy car tailed me for twenty minutes, just so he could take a picture of my license plate and tell me there's a $300 fine for flicking cigarette ashes out your window. FML

#19394810
220 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7297) - you deserved it (17120)

On 04/02/2012 at 12:17pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada

Today, the only person to wish me a happy birthday was a survey website. I took their stupid survey out of appreciation. FML

#19391757
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14279) - you deserved it (1271)

On 04/01/2012 at 10:33pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, while I was sleeping, I managed to knock down the curtains by my bed. That would explain the gash on my head and blood on my bed. FML

#19348769
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13137) - you deserved it (1235)

On 03/26/2012 at 12:31am - misc - by Ringo McDingo (man) - United States

Today, a man on the subway serenaded me. That's not the issue. He was cross-eyed, making it hard for me not to laugh in his face. FML

#19349912
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5847) - you deserved it (19799)

On 03/26/2012 at 6:53am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I slipped in a pile of vomit someone left for me on the train platform on the way to work, spraying puke all over both of my legs. It's only 6:30am. It's going to be a long day. FML

#19359606
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15867) - you deserved it (1127)

On 03/27/2012 at 8:37pm - work - by takhay (man) - Japan (Tokyo)

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I brought a girl home. My dad's first reaction was to pull out the camera and snap away. She now won't reply to my texts or calls. FML

#19374063
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16831) - you deserved it (1605)

On 03/30/2012 at 1:00am - misc - by jasonnn (man) - Australia

Today, I was kicked out of my review lecture at community college, for "being a disturbance and refusing to stop whistling." I wasn't even given a chance to explain that I have a cold. FML

#19382867
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15189) - you deserved it (1433)

On 03/31/2012 at 2:53pm - misc - by Alyssa - United States (North Carolina)

Today, because I was the only manager scheduled, I went into work despite feeling sick to my stomach. While sitting down with a customer, I got the urge to throw up and tried to hold it back. Instead I vomited in my mouth, instinctively swallowed and started choking in front of the customer. FML

#19385942
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18140) - you deserved it (1973)

On 04/01/2012 at 12:32am - work - by Kristat (woman) - United States



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