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October 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my otherwise lovely boyfriend of a month showed his true colors. He freaked out when he learned that I use tampons instead of pads. He yelled that using them is like cheating on him, because his penis is the only thing that should ever enter me. FML

#20925494
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55058) - you deserved it (5211)

On 10/18/2013 at 7:01pm - love - by O-|---<=~ (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was on a dinner date with a guy I really like. I guess I was on my phone too much because halfway through the date he sent me a text saying how much my half of the bill would be. FML

#20904456
319 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16568) - you deserved it (109896)

On 10/02/2013 at 8:43am - love - by Lilly (woman) - United States (Arkansas)

Today, and for the fifth week in a row, my dad has been moping around and acting pissy about everything because his psycho girlfriend won't talk to him. He now claims his life is over. I'm being raised by a teenage girl. FML

Today, I introduced my girlfriend to my mom. The first thing my mom did was look at her breasts and mention that no matter what happens, hers were the first that I suckled on. FML

#20909928
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50643) - you deserved it (3581)

On 10/06/2013 at 5:54pm - love - by UHM (man) - United States

Today, someone stole my card number and tried to use it. Every transaction got declined, not because the bank knew it was a fraudulent charge, but because I'm so poor that he couldn't make even a single purchase. FML

Today, some ass-bandit broke into my house by smashing a window, just so he could steal the ancient VHS cassette player that my wife wouldn't let me throw away. Thanks, scumbag, but the front door was unlocked. FML

#20919168
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44825) - you deserved it (3921)

On 10/13/2013 at 5:50pm - money - by and she blames me -_- (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I accidentally texted a picture of my cock to my dad. FML

#20907559
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26682) - you deserved it (79602)

On 10/04/2013 at 7:36pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was playing soccer when a player kicked the ball at my crotch. In pain, I kneeled down. The referee came up to me and whispered, "The smaller they are, the more it hurts." FML

#20911508
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42671) - you deserved it (3702)

On 10/07/2013 at 8:21pm - misc - by Agax (man) - United States (California)

Today, my new deodorant caused an allergic reaction, covering my armpits in a painful rash. I've had to awkwardly waddle around all day with my arms splayed outwards to get any relief. One customer at work sarcastically mentioned that it's nice that they're hiring penguins these days. FML

#20909610
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39490) - you deserved it (3341)

On 10/06/2013 at 1:40pm - health - by _/ | \_ (woman) - Singapore

Today, I realized how bad my OCD is when I accidentally got a paper cut and I was annoyed by the fact that the cut wasn't in a straight line. FML

#20927328
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42061) - you deserved it (6274)

On 10/20/2013 at 10:34am - health - by Teiu88 (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, some kid asked me if I was Mexican. After I explained to him that I was actually Venezuelan, he simply snorted and said, "That's the same f*cking thing. If you speak Spanish then you're Mexican." FML

#20939700
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46842) - you deserved it (5325)

On 10/30/2013 at 10:59pm - misc - by Rinelric1998 (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, while in bed, my boyfriend pointed to my stomach and said, "Bad fat", then pointed to my boobs and said, "Good fat." FML

#20906869
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52020) - you deserved it (7217)

On 10/04/2013 at 4:20am - misc - by f.a.t. (woman) - Australia

Today, my wife's pregnancy hormones got so bad that she freaked out and threw a tantrum, accusing me of always making important decisions for her. All I did was get her some food from Taco Bell as a surprise. FML

#20912485
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54861) - you deserved it (5102)

On 10/08/2013 at 1:57pm - intimacy - by hubby - United States



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