By Anonymous - 15/02/2011 19:28 - United States

Spicy
Today, while sitting on the couch, my boyfriend came over, pulled his penis out of his fly, and started stabbing me in the face with it while humming the Jaws theme. FML
I agree, your life sucks 51 199
You deserved it 14 274
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Same thing different taste

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Top comments

gregoriit 4

i would say you life sucks, but no sucking seems to be going on, so am not sure what to press. =(

156 4

Comments

hahayousucks 3

lol jaws dies... so slap it around a few times, it'll die

18 5
meowmeowwkitty 0

def not a FML if he's hot, get someee

0 0
meowmeowwkitty 0

or if you love him ofcourse ;)

0 6
actingbro 3

I like 143's point of view, it's kinda hot

3 8
DearlyBeloved20 3

Yeah the shark will swallow you whole

1 7
Pawned71 0

throw a harpoon at it before it eats u!!!!

10 1
TayonaC 10

ok now that wasn't funny

0 8
rawrgle 7

You better eat the shark before it eats you.

10 1
gregoriit 4

i would say you life sucks, but no sucking seems to be going on, so am not sure what to press. =(

156 4
SkateElement44 0

Why was she out of the kitchen? Did someone put a couch in there?

19 46
yesiyes 0

LOOOOL,hes a keeper! :D

3 5
NickK49 0

Where did that come from 169?

1 0
yesiyes 0

ok?151 soundss kindaaa creepy.. :O dammit i dont get the fisherman humor-___-

0 0
ImaginaryFoe 0

I have to agree. Unless you were having the shittiest day ever, this is funny and sweet, in a sick way. If your senses of humour are so incompatible that you feel this is an FML, you're probably not going to last long as a couple.

25 5
Lallafa 0

I wish I could give this post more thumbs up...

1 2
Rei_Ayanami 18

Normally I would find that rather ignorant, but it's actually quite funny.

17 21
lemoncows 2

you're so ignorant you can't even use the term ignorant correctly.

11 5
Rei_Ayanami 18

Allow me to rephrase my comment, "Normally I call somebody who did that ignorant" of course meaning ignorant to what people will and will not tolerate.

7 11
obviouslyimdrunk 0

but his hand was on his.....mmkay

6 0
punkrulz 1

I would imagine there is a good chance he has two hands... or could wash them after the hilarity has ensued. Personally I'm sure everyone touches their privates at some point during the day but what do I know. I wanna high five this guy too!

0 2
TheDeadlyBones 0

hey!!! maybe this guy wants to high five that guys mmkay hand!!! or his mmkay itself!!! who knows!!! XP

1 0
DocBastard 38

Would you say your boyfriend was a Great White or a guppy?

16 4
iliketurdles 7

what if he's black? I know, I'm terrible but I'm sorry, I couldn't help my self.

2 1
TaylorTotsYumm 10

And if he's Asian.. Lemon shark.

7 1
iloveboyswittats 10

Captain obvious

0 0
Kelita 0

WELL op did say FML at the end soooo I'm guessin he's a guppy.....

7 1
ZTB13 4

It's not the size of the shark... It's the motion if the ocean.

19 1