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Thursday 21 March 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I finally got to meet my boyfriend's parents; it turns out that his mum is my therapist. I've just spent an entire morning telling her how confused I am about my sexuality. FML

#20553373
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49651) - you deserved it (6371)

On 03/21/2013 at 6:25am - misc - by me (woman) - United Kingdom (West Sussex)

Today, I was walking by the side of the interstate because my car broke down. A nice young man stopped and asked if I was tired of walking. I said yes, to which he replied, "Try jogging asshole" then laughed and drove off. It was raining balls. FML

#20553491
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40373) - you deserved it (3622)

On 03/21/2013 at 9:31am - misc - by WetWalking - United States (Texas)

Today, while making love to my boyfriend for the first time, I moaned his name. He freaked out over how I wasn't over my ex, and angrily left. They have the same name. FML

#20555878
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59979) - you deserved it (8585)

On 03/23/2013 at 12:43am - intimacy - by nraecher (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, it was raining heavily so I wore my black poncho as I walked to work. On the way there I noticed an old and seemingly homeless man following me. I turned around to confront him. He picked up a stick and screamed "Expecto Patronum!" Apparently I look like a dementor. FML

#20558527
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34451) - you deserved it (6313)

On 03/24/2013 at 8:23pm - misc - by Anna L. - United States (Texas)

Today, my cat learned how to open doors. Ever since then she's been running up to my room, opening my door, and running away. My cat is playing ding-dong ditch. FML

#20559057
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36740) - you deserved it (4809)

On 03/25/2013 at 3:18am - animals - by Apes (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was freshening up my makeup in the car before a date. An old lady walked by and said through my open window, "Don't bother. There's no helping you, honey." FML

#20559530
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41448) - you deserved it (4384)

On 03/25/2013 at 2:36pm - love - by f-ugly - United States

Today, I finally built up the courage to quit my job. I waited an hour to speak to the boss; I finally sat down with her, and she told me I had to be let go because I'm not "reliable enough." The only time I missed work was when I had the stomach flu. I was fired before I could even quit. FML

#20554644
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34110) - you deserved it (3305)

On 03/22/2013 at 2:13am - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my husband showed up late to my mother's funeral. He swaggered in, happily finishing off a half-eaten taco. His excuse for why he was so cheerful: "She was an in-law, honey." Good to know I married a piece of shit in disguise. FML

#20556485
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42772) - you deserved it (5246)

On 03/23/2013 at 1:30pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen)

Today, I walked into the room naked while my wife was on the computer to surprise her. She smiled, put down her laptop and left for the bathroom so I started jerking it in anticipation. It was really feeling good until my wife's best friend, who was on Skype, started giggling. FML

#20550602
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52165) - you deserved it (23206)

On 03/19/2013 at 8:31am - intimacy - by fredo (man) - United States (Iowa)

Today, I was complaining to my husband about a busty but vapid celebrity, and he replied, "She doesn't need brains, honey, she has boobs. You wouldn't understand." FML

#20557361
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35491) - you deserved it (6290)

On 03/24/2013 at 1:14am - love - by Beestings (woman) - United States

Today, I woke up with a giant red rash all over my face, so puffed up that I could hardly open my eyes. The doctor said it was probably from some of the compounds found in most makeup. I'm just getting into theatre and have auditions coming up. FML

#20549343
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33502) - you deserved it (3844)

On 03/18/2013 at 2:42pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, while at my boyfriend's house, I needed to use the bathroom. I decided to be a good girlfriend and leave the seat up for him. He later yelled at me for not putting the seat down because he needed to take a dump. FML

#20557546
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36304) - you deserved it (8547)

On 03/24/2013 at 3:35am - love - by whatchagonnado - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, a few months after my co-worker had stopped wearing her engagement ring, I decided to put on the moves and start flirting with her. I soon found out that her fiancé had died, and that she's nowhere near over him, despite her brave face. I feel like a total asshole. FML

#20558292
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48251) - you deserved it (24843)

On 03/24/2013 at 5:33pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)



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