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Wednesday 30 January 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, at my retail job, a woman came to my till with her purchases. After I scanned all her items, she handed me two small bags. One was filled with nickels and dimes. The other was filled with cents. Her total was $28.53. The coins amounted to $22.30. FML

#20490092
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24837) - you deserved it (1953)

On 02/02/2013 at 9:53am - work - by fuckedbyretail (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, after having lost my phone three days ago, I paid a $150 non-refundable fee to have my phone replaced and mailed to me by Tuesday. A half hour later, I found my original phone. FML

#20491153
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17612) - you deserved it (9662)

On 02/03/2013 at 2:14am - money - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I walked in on my mom drenched in tears, barely able to speak. I ran to get her some tissues and a nice cup of tea to calm her down. After a few minutes of sitting in silence, I asked her if she wanted to talk about what happened. She watched an episode of Gossip Girl. FML

#20491267
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22514) - you deserved it (1819)

On 02/03/2013 at 4:58am - misc - by wetqueefa (man) - United States (California)

Today, at a friendly get-together, my friend's husband had too much to drink and got into a fistfight with my husband. I'm seven-and-a-half months pregnant, and the friendly get-together was my baby shower. FML

#20493991
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24144) - you deserved it (2419)

On 02/05/2013 at 12:22am - misc - by anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I asked my bosses for three weeks off in July to go on a much-needed vacation. Their response was to fire me on the spot. My bosses are my aunt and uncle. FML

#20489213
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26045) - you deserved it (3061)

On 02/01/2013 at 5:13pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - Romania (Cluj)

Today, my mum came to my ballet class. She spent the whole lesson sitting at the back yelling at me to "stop sticking your butt out". My ballet instructor had to ask her several times to pipe down. FML

#20495701
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21013) - you deserved it (1266)

On 02/06/2013 at 1:57pm - misc - by embarassinggg (woman) - United Kingdom (East Sussex)

Today, during a date, I discovered that if I cough with my mouth closed, snot will spray from my nose all over the place like some kind of mucus cannon. FML

#20484952
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22644) - you deserved it (4449)

On 01/29/2013 at 4:23pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I spun off the road and into a ditch. The insurance company told me I'd have to wait an hour, as they had other cars to tow first. I had to pee so badly that I resorted to using the only thing I had in my car: a plastic bag. That's when I got a knock on my window from the tow truck driver. FML

#20489830
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20851) - you deserved it (3843)

On 02/02/2013 at 1:57am - misc - by merp. (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I ran into a former co-worker who I hadn't seen in years. She was raving at how I hadn't aged a bit, but before I could thank her she said, "But, you know, chubby people age better." FML

#20492811
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20890) - you deserved it (2189)

On 02/04/2013 at 7:17am - work - by Colleen Nichols - United States (New Jersey)

Today, working as a nurse, I saw a patient in for follow-up after a partial leg amputation. I checked her blood pressure and gave her the reading, which prompted her husband to ask what it meant. She replied, "I'm alive." Before I could stop myself, "And kicking" spilled out of my mouth. FML

#20493802
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19776) - you deserved it (6203)

On 02/04/2013 at 10:30pm - health - by facepalm - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I almost died. How? I nearly suffocated after passing out while chewing an entire pack of gum. I should really drink less. FML

#20484025
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6069) - you deserved it (29181)

On 01/28/2013 at 11:23pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was on the treadmill at the gym, when I felt my pants start slipping. I tried to pull them up, but lost my balance and fell face-first onto the floor. When I go to my wedding tomorrow, half the guests will probably think I've exchanged my fiancé for Chris Brown. FML

#20489307
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22966) - you deserved it (2888)

On 02/01/2013 at 6:31pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Brazil

Today, my dad and his new wife got their wedding pictures done. Out of over 150 pictures, I was only in one. The family dog was in all of them. In the one picture of me, I was holding the dog's leash while he took a dump. FML

#20486408
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29257) - you deserved it (1572)

On 01/30/2013 at 4:05pm - animals - by puppydrama - United States



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