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Sunday 11 November 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, after dealing with infidelity in my marriage, I found myself looking for advice. This led me to the comments section of a tabloid article talking about Kristen Stewart and Rob Pattinson. I'm a 30-year-old man taking marriage advice from a bunch of vampire-obsessed tweens. FML

#20156173
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16764) - you deserved it (5140)

On 11/09/2012 at 11:07am - love - by loser (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I threw up after drinking a smoothie my mother made me. She then called me "ungrateful" and "immature" for not liking what she spent a long time making for me. I later found out that not only did she use expired yogurt, it was also a mango smoothie, which I'm allergic to. FML

#20153910
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22857) - you deserved it (1349)

On 11/07/2012 at 6:28pm - health - by anon - United States

Today, I had to stand next to my wife at the supermarket, beet-red and pretending not to exist; about half an hour into our shopping, she completely lost her shit at the advertising on the loudspeaker, turned to another patron, and screamed into his face to shut the fuck up. FML

#20164356
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16457) - you deserved it (1985)

On 11/15/2012 at 2:47pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Ireland

Today, my husband surprised me by cooking a romantic dinner. I asked him why the sudden gesture. His response? "The cable was out." FML

#20154549
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17673) - you deserved it (3978)

On 11/08/2012 at 12:49am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was singing in the shower, when some suds from my shampoo fell into my mouth and down my throat. I retched and sputtered for about two minutes before finally throwing up. FML

#20166301
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17822) - you deserved it (6869)

On 11/17/2012 at 3:45am - health - by woman - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my grandmother said to me, "You look just like your mother did at your age. Except you're fatter of course." FML

#20148363
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19321) - you deserved it (4242)

On 11/05/2012 at 12:39am - misc - by poro123 - United Kingdom

Today, I went to Target with my dad, and he told me to get in the shopping cart. I thought he was being cool and wanted to push me around. He snorted and said he was thinking about crashing me into a car and suing the driver. FML

#20167613
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17130) - you deserved it (2045)

On 11/18/2012 at 2:04am - misc - by creys - United States

Today, I awoke in the midst of the night to find my half-naked dad drunkenly arguing with the microwave. FML

#20168543
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17842) - you deserved it (1441)

On 11/18/2012 at 7:47pm - misc - by mountains - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, knowing that I have been in a lot of stress lately, my friend tried to teach me how to meditate. Eventually, I ended up in a deeply relaxed state in which my mind was completely clear. When I snapped out of it, I realized I'd peed myself. FML

#20163308
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20451) - you deserved it (2985)

On 11/14/2012 at 4:55pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I was planning on enjoying my one day off work from the hospital, at home. I got a call saying I had to come in because my department was short-handed. I went in to find almost everyone there. Turns out it was a prank by my coworkers. FML

#20148851
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21822) - you deserved it (1418)

On 11/05/2012 at 12:33pm - work - by Anonymous - Australia

Today, my older brother thought it would be hilarious to sneak up and scare me in the grocery aisle at the store. I screamed and jumped, knocking half the shelf's contents all over the floor. We're now banned from the only grocery store in town. FML

#20166242
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20746) - you deserved it (2615)

On 11/17/2012 at 1:42am - misc - by sarahhbear - United States (Texas)

Today, I had a booth at a very expensive craft show. My grandma came to show her support. While there, she managed to knock over my display, get in the way of potential buyers and take down a rather old lady when she supposedly stumbled. This all happened in the first five minutes she was there. FML

#20167730
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19250) - you deserved it (1581)

On 11/18/2012 at 5:02am - work - by soldnone - Canada (Ontario)

Today, as my girlfriend and I were finishing up a romantic dinner, she gazed into my eyes for a moment and said, "You know, sometimes you look like a character from Sesame Street." FML

#20153942
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16228) - you deserved it (1721)

On 11/07/2012 at 6:48pm - misc - by derve - United States



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