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Saturday 10 November 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I came home to find that my girlfriend had repainted my bedroom. As she had offered to do it, it shouldn't have been a problem. However, she decided to return the several unopened cans of off-white paint that I'd bought for something "more neutral." Like "Sunset Orange." FML

#20165039
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13908) - you deserved it (1810)

On 11/16/2012 at 12:51am - misc - by spaceforrent - United States

Today, just as I was about to orgasm, my boyfriend whispered, "Cum, my preciousssss" into my ear, in his scarily accurate Gollum voice. I think my clitoris just about withered away in despair. FML

#20165510
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31267) - you deserved it (3170)

On 11/16/2012 at 2:42pm - intimacy - by thanks, fuckface (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my dog and I were sitting on the couch. I went to the bathroom, came back, and saw him walk over the remote, which caused the TV to change to the Hustler channel, just a few moments before my girlfriend walked through the door. FML

#20157085
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18844) - you deserved it (2995)

On 11/10/2012 at 1:51am - animals - by Sam l. - United States

Today, I was bitched out by my supervisor because of my lack of "customer service" skills. I work at a jail and all my "customers" are criminals. FML

#20152272
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20537) - you deserved it (3826)

On 11/07/2012 at 12:48am - work - by jailofc (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, after finishing a test, I decided to draw to pass the time. My teacher looked at the drawing and gave me a referral to the principal for drawing an "anti-Semitic picture." I'd drawn Superman. FML

#20163905
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14089) - you deserved it (972)

On 11/15/2012 at 1:01am - misc - by Superman (man) - United States (California)

Today, my father told me to take the car and get some groceries. An hour and a half later, coming home with the groceries, I see the cops all around my house because my dad had called them, thinking that I had run away and stolen the car. FML

#20159802
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21247) - you deserved it (1222)

On 11/11/2012 at 11:30pm - misc - by me - United States (Indiana)

Today, while at work, a customer gave me a $20 tip. I explained to him we aren't allowed to accept tips, but he insisted. When I called the manager to report it, he pocketed my tip. FML

#20157115
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11680) - you deserved it (25163)

On 11/10/2012 at 2:23am - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, yet again, my boss whined to me like a baby over being "friend-zoned" by his secretary. Not only does he basically stalk her and make her eat lunch with him every day, she's a lesbian in a committed relationship. He suspended me after I lost it and told him to see a fucking therapist. FML

#20165849
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21111) - you deserved it (3774)

On 11/16/2012 at 8:06pm - work - by wow @ creepy fuckers (man) - United States

Today, after a year of living with my boyfriend at our new place, he told me that he wants to sell our house and live in a trailer, so he can be closer to his mom. FML

#20155172
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15112) - you deserved it (1460)

On 11/08/2012 at 4:22pm - misc - by Anonimo (woman) - Italy (Sardegna)

Today, I was at the library using a computer to order a package. A man sat down next to me mumbling to himself while staring at me. As I got up to go to the printer, he pointed at me and screamed, "I will burn you alive and enjoy it!" All of my info including my address was still on the computer screen. FML

#20161493
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20520) - you deserved it (4397)

On 11/13/2012 at 2:36am - misc - by sarahcurtis213 - United States

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because she found out I share a birthday with a fictional character who is "untrustworthy" and has a "dark side", so therefore I can't be trusted either. FML

#20163899
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18190) - you deserved it (1365)

On 11/15/2012 at 12:48am - love - by B-Rad (man) - United States

Today, I had to take my little brother to the pool. He acted like a brat the whole time, and when I told him we were leaving, he ran away, slipped, and hit his face on the tile floor. He told my dad and step-mom I punched him. They believed him, and I'm grounded for two months. FML

#20167155
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25720) - you deserved it (1540)

On 11/17/2012 at 7:41pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my girlfriend admitted to me that she has been sleeping with someone on her girls basketball team, which at first turned me on. Then I found out he's the team manager. FML

#20164114
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19186) - you deserved it (5927)

On 11/15/2012 at 8:37am - love - by SweetStuff88 (man) - United States



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