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Saturday 3 November 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I had to go to my daughter's school because she hasn't been going to class. Her teacher seemed surprised to see me with my husband when we arrived. Apparently I "died" recently and my daughter has had extra responsibility around the house, hence why she doesn't come to class. FML

#20154716
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31279) - you deserved it (2445)

On 11/08/2012 at 6:09am - kids - by Shauna (woman) - United States

Today, I sampled some of the food my fiancée's mom is making for our wedding. Everything tasted terrible, and I almost vomited. Turns out she never actually went to culinary school as she claimed, but had just watched Julie and Julia. It's too late to book another caterer for the wedding. FML

#20145916
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26745) - you deserved it (5403)

On 11/03/2012 at 3:42pm - health - by WeddingWoes (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I broke up with my girlfriend, saying I had a lot on my plate. She responded by throwing an empty plate at my windshield. FML

#20138170
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12119) - you deserved it (27473)

On 10/29/2012 at 1:46am - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, after a year of living with my boyfriend at our new place, he told me that he wants to sell our house and live in a trailer, so he can be closer to his mom. FML

#20155172
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23478) - you deserved it (2464)

On 11/08/2012 at 4:22pm - misc - by Anonimo (woman) - Italy (Sardegna)

Today, my girlfriend decided to invite her best friend over for a threesome. This would've been the best day ever, had I not been at work while it was taking place. FML

#20150477
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41060) - you deserved it (4055)

On 11/06/2012 at 1:07pm - intimacy - by sadness1992 - United States (California)

Today, while I was sitting on the toilet, my toddler swung the door open. We just bought the house, and we have no curtains. Our new neighbor, who I haven't met, was mowing her yard. I stood half-naked to close the door, and our eyes met. I froze. She waved. FML

#20154142
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23315) - you deserved it (2417)

On 11/07/2012 at 8:41pm - misc - by ohcrap (man) - United States

Today, I looked up the side effects of the antidepressants I've recently started taking. Inability to orgasm is one of them. I can either not be depressed, or I can have an orgasm. FML

#20148960
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32455) - you deserved it (4108)

On 11/05/2012 at 2:25pm - intimacy - by HappinessOrOrgasms (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I was at a barbeque with my family, my boyfriend, and some mutual acquaintances. Someone jokingly called my boyfriend a pussy, to which he loudly replied, "I guess I am what I eat!" My mother was sitting across from us. FML

#20141794
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28231) - you deserved it (3915)

On 10/31/2012 at 4:24pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my crazy bitch of a boss fired me for inappropriate conduct. Apparently my "fake Nazi accent" is "offensive to our Jewish coworkers." I'm German. I have no way to change the way I speak, or to pay this month's bills. FML

#20155705
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34851) - you deserved it (1889)

On 11/08/2012 at 11:02pm - work - by Screwed - United States (Maryland)

Today, my newly ex-fiancé, the father of my 5-year-old child, moved out of state with no warning. I just spent my last $500 paying off his car, and the rent is due tomorrow. FML

#20144316
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25835) - you deserved it (5866)

On 11/02/2012 at 12:35pm - love - by lilithfaye (woman) - United States

Today, I texted my boyfriend saying that I couldn't wait for him to get home and see my costume, and that I had dressed up as a naked lady. He texted back asking if I could dress up as someone who was making dinner instead. FML

#20142541
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34625) - you deserved it (7119)

On 11/01/2012 at 3:54am - intimacy - by okay._. - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend of two years proposed to me. It would have been great if he weren't drunk with a naked girl next to him. FML

#20146861
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31079) - you deserved it (2205)

On 11/04/2012 at 4:50am - love - by bigbum - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was woken up by my husband attempting to breastfeed off my lactating nipples. FML

#20139029
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25603) - you deserved it (3150)

On 10/29/2012 at 6:22pm - misc - by Indianagirl94 (woman) - United States



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