Sex, Awkward and Intimacy: Keep going!

Keep going!

By Taraa3 - 10/10/2009 10:19 - United Kingdom

Today, my boyfriend came to wake me up with some flowers and breakfast in bed. We started getting intimate, after a short while, there was a knock. We looked out of the window and there was the window cleaner with his thumbs up and grinning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 312

You deserved it 5 066

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Same thing different taste

That was quick

By Anonymous - 09/09/2012 12:03 - United States - Altamonte Springs

Today, while trying to rouse my sleeping boyfriend for some morning sex, he came. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 550

You deserved it 6 818

By English_Nut117 - 30/10/2013 19:17 - Canada - Georgetown

Today, my boyfriend came onto me in a romantic gesture. We ended up having sex, forgetting that the window repair guy was supposed to come today and do some work on our third floor apartment windows. I still don't know how much he saw. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 664

You deserved it 15 189

Enjoy the show

By Anonymous - 30/09/2023 08:00

Today, my boyfriend and I were having early morning sex and I was getting pretty loud. Suddenly, I got a text from Amazon saying my overnight package had just been delivered. You have to walk by my room to get to the front door, and my window was wide open. The text came with a grinning emoji. FML

I agree, your life sucks 374

You deserved it 393

By annoyedgf - 11/07/2015 12:44

Today, I woke up to my boyfriend standing at the end of the bed staring at a large wet spot. Boy do I know how to pick 'em! FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 996

You deserved it 3 371

By Eet- - 13/10/2011 19:20 - United Kingdom

Today, I awoke to rose petals leading me to the front garden. Curious, I followed them, thinking my boyfriend planned something romantic. As I walked out the door, I was hit in the face with a paper plate full of whipped cream and sprinkles, and then locked outside. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 197

You deserved it 4 246

Surprise indeed

By Anonymous - 18/10/2010 14:24 - Netherlands

Today, I decided to surprise my boyfriend because he's been working extra hard these last two months. I went to his house only to find him in bed with another girl. Standing there, with fifteen roses in my hands, all he could say was, "Thank you, can you put them in a vase?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 152

You deserved it 3 700

By breeeeeh - 21/06/2013 22:18 - France - Brou-sur-chantereine

Today, I woke up to a stranger in my bed. Just as my parents responded to my screaming, I remembered that I'd helped my boyfriend sneak in through my window last night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 679

You deserved it 69 921

Make your mind up!

By nextcontestant16 - 19/11/2012 15:12 - United States

Today, I decided to surprise my boyfriend by waking him up with a blowjob, because he had always told me that it was a sexy fantasy of his. When he finally woke up, he got pissed off, rudely accused me of interrupting his beauty sleep, then soundly lay back down and fell asleep again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 551

You deserved it 5 099

By Anonymous - 15/01/2011 05:52 - United States

Today, after work, I came home to my boyfriend sleeping on the couch. Feeling romantic, I started to undo his pants. My reward was him waking up and kneeing me in the eye. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 855

You deserved it 27 885

Easily scared

By Anonymous - 17/02/2022 17:59 - France

Today, I was having some sexy time with my boyfriend, when suddenly he jumped out of the bed, screaming. Not having my glasses on, it took me few seconds to understand that a voyeurist cockroach was in the bed with us. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 269

You deserved it 163

insertfmlhere 0

Saturday 10 October 2009 16:09

Maybe he'll come inside and wash your bed after you finish, except that could be a bad bed cleaner...

misspeg 0

Saturday 10 October 2009 16:32

hmm not really a fml. I think the window cleaner was actually being quite polite b4 it got any further!

Comments

insertfmlhere 0

Saturday 10 October 2009 16:09

Maybe he'll come inside and wash your bed after you finish, except that could be a bad bed cleaner...

B4SK3TB4IL 0

Thursday 9 September 2010 4:55

FAKE

zelhackin 0

Sunday 29 May 2011 8:54

What an moron he had a free show and he ruined it

sneek_fml 1

Friday 22 July 2011 10:18

how much u wana bet he had his pants down some people are like that

possesed0ne 0

Saturday 10 October 2009 16:16

first!

life_sucks_bad 0

Saturday 10 October 2009 18:56

fail

deference 0

Tuesday 27 October 2009 10:57

epic?

stupiddumbblonde 0

Saturday 10 October 2009 16:16

third. OP that sucks...you should preform in front of an audience?

possesed0ne 0

Saturday 10 October 2009 16:17

second too!!!

Kingfmltrust 0

Saturday 10 October 2009 16:23

wow

possesed0ne 0

Saturday 10 October 2009 16:25

in soviet Russia, window clean YOU!

kkns 2

Thursday 7 April 2011 2:41

hahaha

Basiil 0

Saturday 10 October 2009 16:29

lol. he is obviously a person who did have sex before. oh wait ;x

misspeg 0

Saturday 10 October 2009 16:32

hmm not really a fml. I think the window cleaner was actually being quite polite b4 it got any further!

kukopia 0

Tuesday 13 October 2009 16:23

Agreed

katrinaa_13 0

Saturday 10 October 2009 17:09

ROFLL, ooh sucks to be you. (N)

michaelcarell 0

Saturday 10 October 2009 17:40

Threesome!

sneek_fml 1

Friday 22 July 2011 10:20

hell ya!!

Keywords

Relatable Public freakouts Health Music Scams Geek Poopoo peepee Awkward Jewelry Bikes Transportation Cops Kids Fight Family AITA Mother in law Miscellaneous Relationship advice Social Media Love Art Work Students Sleep Noise Animals Birds Mental health Medication

The Top

Today, I tried to nicely talk to my daughter about her rapid weight gain. Having a family history of weight-related illness, I felt it was necessary. I offered to get thyroid tests, teach her to buy healthy food, and start routine exercise. She told everyone I called her a cow and had fat-shamed her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 883

You deserved it 192

Today, my mother, who thinks I'm a virgin, called me while I was having sex with my boyfriend. I have to answer every time she calls or she freaks out. I ended the conversation quickly and hung up. Or so I thought. She listened in to the rest of our 20-minute lovemaking session, and I have some explaining to do. FML

I agree, your life sucks 791

You deserved it 1 708

The Top

Today, I have been on the toilet all day due to chocolate laxatives from trick-or-treating. Today, it is my birthday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 528

You deserved it 311

Today, I went to the mall with some friends. We all kept smelling this god awful B.O. smell and had no idea where it was coming from. On the car ride home, we all figured out it was actually me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 408

You deserved it 12 097

Today, after I left a very abusive relationship a year ago, I decided I wanted to start dating again, since I'm in a much better place, and I really worked hard through therapy. I told my parents, who then told me that I'm too lazy and needy for a relationship. Progress doesn't matter I guess. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 324

You deserved it 174

Dating is hard.

I agree, your life sucks 331

You deserved it 95

Today, I became the town racist for saying "black" instead of "African-American". I'm black. FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 764

You deserved it 5 560

Today, I realized the only way I can get hard is if my partner rubs my back and hamstrings for an unreasonable amount of time. My boyfriend thinks I’m being manipulative. FML

I agree, your life sucks 844

You deserved it 369

Keep going!

Same thing different taste

That was quick

Enjoy the show

Surprise indeed

Make your mind up!

Easily scared

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