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January 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, while sledding with my daughter, I tried getting her to go down a steeper slope than she's used to. She was worried she'd crash, so I went first to show her how it's done. I lost control halfway down the hill, bailed, and rolled into a tree. My wife has it on video. FML

Today, my dad and his new wife got their wedding pictures done. Out of over 150 pictures, I was only in one. The family dog was in all of them. In the one picture of me, I was holding the dog's leash while he took a dump. FML

#20486408
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36536) - you deserved it (2594)

On 01/30/2013 at 4:05pm - animals - by puppydrama - United States

Today, I went to the grocery store with my boyfriend. I wasn't feeling well so I wasn't paying too much attention to his usual antics. Since he thought I was ignoring him, he decided to grab me roughly by the stomach to give me a hug. I ended up puking right in the middle of the aisle. FML

#20484554
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29251) - you deserved it (2938)

On 01/29/2013 at 9:51am - health - by oh no (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, my roommate of a year and good friend of several more decided to move out. When I came home from a long work shift, I found all the cupboards emptied out of everything, including all the new stuff I bought to replace what she was going to take with her. FML

#20438571
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31894) - you deserved it (2432)

On 01/02/2013 at 12:38pm - misc - by Megz (woman) - United States (Iowa)

Today, I was walking towards a party where I knew my cheating ex would be. I passionately rehearsed how I would have a go at him big time when I met him. Guess who was walking right behind me and heard it all. FML

#20465975
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13395) - you deserved it (38898)

On 01/18/2013 at 7:55am - love - by Shuttie (woman) - Denmark (Syddanmark)

Today, my boyfriend tried to hypnotize me into breaking up with him. FML

#20485216
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29234) - you deserved it (3012)

On 01/29/2013 at 7:28pm - love - by theawfulpresent (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I got an offer to study at a good university. My father has been pushing me to apply for years, so I ecstatically broke the news. Instead of congratulating me, he just grunted and delivered the more important news that he's divorcing my mum. Moment ruined. FML

#20443641
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22033) - you deserved it (1491)

On 01/05/2013 at 12:09pm - misc - by Sad nerd (woman) - United Kingdom (Hampshire)

Today, while getting intimate with my girlfriend, I felt a sharp pain in my stomach, and had to run to the bathroom to evacuate my bowels. She heard the horrible sounds, and I doubt I'll ever be able to seduce her again. FML

#20480710
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29929) - you deserved it (3459)

On 01/27/2013 at 1:03am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, I went on a first date with the guy I really like. During our dinner, he said he needed to go to the bathroom. You guessed it: he didn't come back. FML

#20438667
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34738) - you deserved it (3131)

On 01/02/2013 at 1:59pm - love - by great. -

Today, my mom barged into my room at three in the morning, demanding to know where I'd been. I'd been in my room sleeping since ten o'clock. In that time she had called the police, all of my friends, and my ex-boyfriend, asking if I was with them. FML

#20479024
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33547) - you deserved it (2122)

On 01/26/2013 at 12:14am - misc - by Sarah - United States

Today, a cyclone hit my city. Though everywhere else is flooding, my house is fine. Well, that was until the toilet decided to overflow and regurgitate the entire town's sewerage. So now my only bathroom is covered in sewage, and I can't go anywhere else because of the flooding. FML

#20481750
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27170) - you deserved it (1891)

On 01/27/2013 at 6:47pm - health - by shitday - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I went on a run with my crush. She expressed how happy she was to have a decent running partner, because the last one kept complaining he thought he might throw up. We got to the top of the hill and I puked right in front of her. FML

#20463224
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32604) - you deserved it (4105)

On 01/16/2013 at 7:53pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Hawaii)

Today, I was chatting with my choir leader. I told him that I have been thinking about taking singing lessons. His immediate reaction was, "Thank god, finally!" FML

#20474677
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24463) - you deserved it (6070)

On 01/23/2013 at 10:44am - misc - by sdd (woman) - Switzerland (Bern)



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