Today, in bio class, we were studying the reproductive system. I don't like talking about this stuff, and I twitched every time my teacher said "penis" or "vagina." When I told my family, they laughed and kept repeating those words just to see me twitch. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7430) - you deserved it (21731)
On 02/28/2012 at 4:03pm - misc - by itshilarious - United States (New York)
Today, I tried to treat a cut on my butt hole with Neosporin. I couldn't see it properly, so I had to use the front-facing camera on my phone. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14404) - you deserved it (4505)
On 02/01/2012 at 11:57pm - health - by 11niko (man) - United States (Washington)
Today, I'm forced to eat half a package of saltine crackers in my room for dinner. I can't go downstairs to the kitchen because my two roommates are going at it on our kitchen table. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21240) - you deserved it (2783)
On 02/16/2012 at 2:13am - intimacy - by robzzz (woman) - Canada
Today, my husband and I worked together on a very difficult yard project. Afterwards, I thanked him and offered him a special treat. He was disappointed to find I meant sex, not cookies. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23519) - you deserved it (3792)
On 02/04/2012 at 2:40pm - intimacy - by me - United States (Texas)
Today, it was our class field trip. I got five dollars from ten different people because they wanted me to sit away from them. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21158) - you deserved it (3210)
On 02/01/2012 at 1:53pm - misc - by Arniii - United States
Today, the captain of my school's girls wrestling team asked me out. I politely declined. She angrily locked me in the trunk of my own car. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26135) - you deserved it (4048)
On 02/26/2012 at 1:12am - love - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my mom was freaking out about me handling a CD-ROM with my bare hands. When I asked her what all the commotion was about, she said she was worried that I would catch "one of those computer viruses" she'd heard about on the news. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33900) - you deserved it (1911)
On 02/02/2012 at 6:32am - misc - by aliezzedine (man) - Lebanon
Today, I have to follow through with the bet I lost over the Super Bowl game. I don't have a problem running a lap nude around my block, but the cops in the police station right across from my house probably will. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7106) - you deserved it (20548)
On 02/07/2012 at 12:58pm - misc - by MillyMan (man) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I was showing off my sexy new lingerie set to my boyfriend. While we were getting frisky, he got really into things and ripped it completely off my body, destroying it. It cost me $110. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20173) - you deserved it (14972)
On 02/18/2012 at 7:29pm - intimacy - by Lilah - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, my boyfriend and I had sex. He swore it wouldn't be 2 minutes long this time. He was right. It was 3 minutes. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22448) - you deserved it (3653)
On 02/11/2012 at 12:57am - intimacy - by anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I found out my wife cheated on me with a guy from her work three times, two months before I proposed to her. She decided to tell me three months into our marriage. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24316) - you deserved it (1504)
On 02/27/2012 at 9:12pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States
Today, my boyfriend's father suggested that, ideally, I should aim to have my baby in early July, or wait until he gets back from Europe in October. I'm due September 4th, and he will be "incredibly disappointed" if he misses the birth of his first grandchild due to my "selfishness". FML
I agree, your life sucks (23765) - you deserved it (1891)
On 02/19/2012 at 3:55am - health - by preggo - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I showed off my new tattoo to my friends. Too bad it says "Walk Earless" now instead of "Walk Fearless." That's right, I'm now supporting Van Gogh. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10291) - you deserved it (22658)
On 02/05/2012 at 12:54am - misc - by inked - United States (Alabama)
Friday 24 May 2013
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML Follow the FML blog 
Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
FML Everywhere: Français - Italiano - Español - Türk - Pусский - Svenskt - Indonesia
