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Today, I happily announced to my parents that I'm pregnant. My dad later handed me a printout containing a list of nearby abortion clinics. FML

#21461568
0 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17451) - you deserved it (1510)

On 08/28/2015 at 1:06am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, on my daughter's 9th birthday, I have to let her know that her dog died in his sleep overnight. Happy birthday. FML

Today, my bitch of a sister broke my new phone, which took me months of work to earn. Her excuse? If I didn't want her to break it, I shouldn't have let her use it. FML

#21461274
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19435) - you deserved it (1735)

On 08/27/2015 at 8:43am - kids - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Bexley)

Today, after twelve straight hours of work, my fourteen year old son surprised me with a broken window and a cracked TV. He said, "I was swatting away a fly." FML

#21461075
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18144) - you deserved it (1243)

On 08/26/2015 at 8:28pm - kids - by tortureromoretorture - United States (New York)

Today, I had my daughter babysit her 2-year-old brother while I went out with my husband. I told her not to let him out of her sight. She certainly did as I said; when I tuned into our internet-enabled baby monitor, I heard her and some guy having sex in the room. FML

#21460833
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21045) - you deserved it (2195)

On 08/26/2015 at 4:04am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, a fifth grader gave me a note from his "father" excusing him from PE. It was riddled with spelling errors and shockingly poor grammar, so I rejected it as a blatant fake. Several hours later, I was informed by his very angry father that it wasn't actually fake. FML

#21460557
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23309) - you deserved it (3208)

On 08/25/2015 at 3:22pm - kids - by shit.jpg (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, while in line at the supermarket, I told the lady behind me that she had a cute baby. She shot me a disgusted look and straight up accused me of being a pedophile. FML

#21460397
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22089) - you deserved it (1462)

On 08/25/2015 at 2:49am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, at my sister's wedding, I got my 15 month old son to 'sign' the big guest book. I gave him a pen and was hoping for a cute little squiggle or something. But no, he managed to draw something that looked uncannily like a big swastika. FML

#21459659
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12654) - you deserved it (12118)

On 08/23/2015 at 12:46pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, the nine year old girl I was babysitting got the hiccups, so I told her to drink some water upside down to cure them. She ended up vomiting on the floor. FML

Today, I screamed like a little girl and scrambled to climb atop the toilet seat when I saw a cockroach running around our bathroom. My 5-year-old nephew came in, slapped it to death and said not to be scared, because he'll always protect me. FML

#21458825
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23517) - you deserved it (6101)

On 08/21/2015 at 11:25am - kids - by MyBallsForSaleOnEbay (man) - Malta

Today, my niece started crying because she thought that someday she'll look like me. FML

#21458278
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22451) - you deserved it (1727)

On 08/19/2015 at 11:25pm - kids - by ambiiii - United States (Texas)

Today, I told my daughter that we're going to the beach. Today, my daughter also tried to dig up our deceased dog that we buried in our back yard last week so it can come along. FML

#21458250
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21940) - you deserved it (1533)

On 08/19/2015 at 10:38pm - kids - by GlueAndCarrots - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my husband and I told my parents that I finally managed to conceive. My mom burst into tears of joy and said how great it was that she's finally going to be a "real" grandma, all within earshot of our adopted and now-devastated daughter. FML

#21457997
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34336) - you deserved it (1738)

On 08/19/2015 at 11:00am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - South Africa



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