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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Man or woman?

Today, my upstairs neighbor woke me with her sex moans, reminding me how single I'll be on Valentine's. FML

#21525773
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8443) - you deserved it (803)

On 02/13/2016 at 10:43am - intimacy - by me_jpg - United States

Today, I found out the only reason I passed maths was because my mum hooked up with my teacher. FML

#21525739
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8767) - you deserved it (1003)

On 02/13/2016 at 5:48am - intimacy - by helloitsme - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I came to the realization that I dream more about my vibrator than I do about my boyfriend. FML

#21525488
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14548) - you deserved it (2629)

On 02/12/2016 at 12:46pm - intimacy - by wet dreams - United States (Georgia)

Today, I experienced one of those moments in life you never forget. I walked into a homeless man masturbating in a parking garage stairwell. FML

#21525394
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16328) - you deserved it (1158)

On 02/12/2016 at 4:00am - intimacy - by scarredforlife (woman) - New Zealand (Wellington)

Today, I found out how painful it is to static shock the tip of your dick. FML

#21525225
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14848) - you deserved it (4343)

On 02/11/2016 at 4:51pm - intimacy - by Electro (man) - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, after long day at work, I stopped by my parents' house to say hi. After 30 minutes into the visit, my dad turns to me and asks, "Did you really have to stop by while I was balls deep?" Apparently I interrupted my parents' sex time. FML

#21525176
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15770) - you deserved it (1862)

On 02/11/2016 at 1:59pm - intimacy - by CmS_1733 (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I asked my husband if he could at least try to give me an orgasm. His response? "Um... why?" FML

#21525139
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19572) - you deserved it (2124)

On 02/11/2016 at 12:06pm - intimacy - by not satisfied - United States (Missouri)

Today, my now ex-boyfriend informed me that he is cheating on me with our neighbor, again. I wasn't aware that he cheated on me the first time. FML

Today, I came inside a girl's vagina by accident. Neither one of us wants her to be pregnant, and I had to spend half an hour with her sitting on my face, while I sucked my own cum out of her. I don't even know if this will work. FML

#21524955
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8259) - you deserved it (43714)

On 02/10/2016 at 9:12pm - intimacy - by nickncik (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my boyfriend said he was too tired to have sex with me because he'd spent the whole day jerking off. FML

#21524473
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19547) - you deserved it (2257)

On 02/09/2016 at 4:51pm - intimacy - by hannieannie - United Kingdom (Oxfordshire)

Today, I tutored a third grade girl after school. She was squirming so much I thought she had to go to the bathroom. Turns out, she was just masturbating on the corner of a school chair. FML

Today, I saw my grandfather on the train, with his cock out. FML

#21523681
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21718) - you deserved it (1621)

On 02/07/2016 at 12:59pm - intimacy - by OhDearGodGrandad (man) - United Kingdom (Redbridge)

Today, for the seventh weekend in a row, I left my weekly visit with my long-distance boyfriend unsatisfied. Seems he enjoys getting shit-faced drunk more than he enjoys getting a boner. FML

#21523668
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18731) - you deserved it (3000)

On 02/07/2016 at 12:43pm - intimacy - by noO (woman) - United States (Indiana)



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