Miscellaneous: Weird flex, but OK

Weird flex, but OK

By college estudiata - 27/06/2015 00:57

Today, I realized I need to get my life together after spilling ramen while taking a bath, again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 151

You deserved it 7 419

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
Find out how a day off can turn into a series of hilarious, unexpected events. More…

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Same thing different taste

Messy

By Anonymous - 03/11/2018 22:00

Today, after a long shift, I came home and cleaned my house so I could relax tomorrow. I finished up the night with a soothing bubble bath, which was lovely until the ceiling collapsed into the tub. I can't even wash the filth off because my bath is full of drain-clogging plaster. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 867

You deserved it 147

By Rayvyn - 21/10/2009 16:40 - United States

Today, I started feeling sick to my stomach. I tried to soothe it with some Ramen, which helped for a while. Later on, I felt worse and threw up the soup. Noodles came out of my nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 879

You deserved it 7 369

Get rid of the evidence!

By Anonymous - 18/08/2020 17:11

Today, while my roommate was taking a bath, I became horribly sick out of nowhere. Since the bathroom was occupied, I ended up having explosive diarrhea in an Amazon box in my bedroom, which I immediately ran out to the dumpster. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 645

You deserved it 149

By Etta - 04/03/2017 22:00 - United States

Today, I stayed home from work, feeling ill. Come lunch time, I made myself some ramen noodles, thinking that the broth would feel good on my throat. Too bad I sneezed while carrying the bowl, dumping the boiling hot broth all down my front. The skin on my boob peeled away like tissue. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 527

You deserved it 584

By Numbass123 - 04/05/2014 17:17 - United States - Las Vegas

Today, I was glued to the toilet all day, gushing fountains of crap, due to my own bad cooking. It got so bad that I ran out of toilet paper and had to desperately jump in the shower and stay there for nearly two hours. I can't even feel my own asshole any more. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 434

You deserved it 11 645

By youonlyneed2squares - 24/09/2014 04:10

Today, as I was lying in my bed eating my dinner, my roommate said to me, "I don't know how to say this, but we need more towels. The room is flooding." FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 141

You deserved it 2 906

By Embarassed - 10/09/2009 05:32 - Canada

Today, I got out of bed and went to the bathroom. At least, I thought I did, until I woke up to my pants, sheets, and boyfriend all soaking wet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 578

You deserved it 8 108

By fatflabbyfail - 20/02/2010 06:09 - United States

Today, after having my bath, I realised that I've gotten so fat that I have to lift up my butt cheeks in order to dry underneath them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 147

You deserved it 42 309

By Lexi - 31/10/2009 20:15 - France

Today, after telling my best friend an idiot could make Kraft Dinner, I spilled boiling water all over my hands and forearms while attempting to strain the noodles. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 212

You deserved it 36 242

Y'all need fiber.

By blondie875 - 26/05/2018 14:30 - United States

Today, I had just gotten out of the shower when I thought I had to fart, so I ripped it. instead, I shat all over myself and my floor. I'm 30. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 509

You deserved it 1 372

player20270 32

Saturday 27 June 2015 23:58

That's not the meaning of "clean eating".

novdestiny 23

Saturday 27 June 2015 23:56

at least it would have been easy to clean up!

Comments

TheLadyOpal 30

Sunday 28 June 2015 0:59

At least it wasn't a toaster.

Silk_Routes 14

Sunday 28 June 2015 1:02

U mean ramen toppings on urself

talkboxbree 10

Sunday 28 June 2015 1:04

sounds like a pretty damn to good life you have going on actually :)

Flint_Monroe 9

Sunday 28 June 2015 1:18

Your new nickname is College-Naruto.

heirofhope 38

Sunday 28 June 2015 1:21

Do you watch FilthyFrankTV? You're straight out of a video called 'Human Ramen'

TeBanana 20

Monday 29 June 2015 1:46

The secret ingredient to the perfect ramen...

littleking94 14

Sunday 28 June 2015 1:28

Yep. Sounds like you have a junk food addiction my friend

Attacksloth 33

Sunday 28 June 2015 1:36

Someone should hand you a chart with activities which should not be combined.

WOTAN1488 24

Sunday 28 June 2015 1:38

That sounds gross. The whole next 45 minutes are ruined.

sugoi72 27

Sunday 28 June 2015 1:43

well you would be literally eaten out

izzajaneful 24

Sunday 28 June 2015 1:49

Buy a tray. Life solved.

Keywords

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The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 30 961

You deserved it 6 333

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The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 37 834

You deserved it 5 926

Today, one my friends died. All my crying gave me a headache, so I asked my boyfriend to bring me some aspirin. My headache didn't go away. Instead, I got diarrhea because my boyfriend gave me laxatives instead of aspirin as a "joke" to cheer me up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 907

You deserved it 4 385

Today, I was woken up by my husband attempting to breastfeed off my lactating nipples. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 682

You deserved it 3 376

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I agree, your life sucks 65 127

You deserved it 7 388

Today, the fire alarm went off in my dorm and I saw and smelled smoke coming under my door. My second story window wouldn't unlock so I broke it open, threw out as many of my belongings as I could, and jumped. Turns out, the smell and noise were from my roomates cheap vacuum cleaner, not a fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 534

You deserved it 25 779

Today, what I thought was food poisoning is actually a baby. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 761

You deserved it 688