Miscellaneous: Weird flex, but OK - FML

Weird flex, but OK

By college estudiata - 27/06/2015 00:57

Today, I realized I need to get my life together after spilling ramen while taking a bath, again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 151

You deserved it 7 419

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
Find out how a day off can turn into a series of hilarious, unexpected events. More…

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Same thing different taste

Messy

By Anonymous - 03/11/2018 22:00

Today, after a long shift, I came home and cleaned my house so I could relax tomorrow. I finished up the night with a soothing bubble bath, which was lovely until the ceiling collapsed into the tub. I can't even wash the filth off because my bath is full of drain-clogging plaster. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 867

You deserved it 147

By Rayvyn - 21/10/2009 16:40 - United States

Today, I started feeling sick to my stomach. I tried to soothe it with some Ramen, which helped for a while. Later on, I felt worse and threw up the soup. Noodles came out of my nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 879

You deserved it 7 369

Get rid of the evidence!

By Anonymous - 18/08/2020 17:11

Today, while my roommate was taking a bath, I became horribly sick out of nowhere. Since the bathroom was occupied, I ended up having explosive diarrhea in an Amazon box in my bedroom, which I immediately ran out to the dumpster. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 645

You deserved it 149

By Etta - 04/03/2017 22:00 - United States

Today, I stayed home from work, feeling ill. Come lunch time, I made myself some ramen noodles, thinking that the broth would feel good on my throat. Too bad I sneezed while carrying the bowl, dumping the boiling hot broth all down my front. The skin on my boob peeled away like tissue. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 527

You deserved it 584

By Numbass123 - 04/05/2014 17:17 - United States - Las Vegas

Today, I was glued to the toilet all day, gushing fountains of crap, due to my own bad cooking. It got so bad that I ran out of toilet paper and had to desperately jump in the shower and stay there for nearly two hours. I can't even feel my own asshole any more. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 434

You deserved it 11 645

By youonlyneed2squares - 24/09/2014 04:10

Today, as I was lying in my bed eating my dinner, my roommate said to me, "I don't know how to say this, but we need more towels. The room is flooding." FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 141

You deserved it 2 906

By Embarassed - 10/09/2009 05:32 - Canada

Today, I got out of bed and went to the bathroom. At least, I thought I did, until I woke up to my pants, sheets, and boyfriend all soaking wet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 578

You deserved it 8 108

By fatflabbyfail - 20/02/2010 06:09 - United States

Today, after having my bath, I realised that I've gotten so fat that I have to lift up my butt cheeks in order to dry underneath them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 147

You deserved it 42 309

By Lexi - 31/10/2009 20:15 - France

Today, after telling my best friend an idiot could make Kraft Dinner, I spilled boiling water all over my hands and forearms while attempting to strain the noodles. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 212

You deserved it 36 242

Y'all need fiber.

By blondie875 - 26/05/2018 14:30 - United States

Today, I had just gotten out of the shower when I thought I had to fart, so I ripped it. instead, I shat all over myself and my floor. I'm 30. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 509

You deserved it 1 372

Next

Top comments

player20270 32

Saturday 27 June 2015 23:58

That's not the meaning of "clean eating".

novdestiny 23

Saturday 27 June 2015 23:56

at least it would have been easy to clean up!

Comments

MmmPinkTacos 11

Sunday 28 June 2015 0:09

I'm confused about which part isn't having your life together.....

Sariasprincy 7

Sunday 28 June 2015 2:48

Their life sounds pretty good to me!

2nd 20

Sunday 28 June 2015 0:10

Why are you eating ramen and bathing at the same time?

RedPillSucks 31

Sunday 28 June 2015 1:38

because he can?

I_Bite 22

Sunday 28 June 2015 1:38

Why not? A lot of people eat and drink in the bath. Personally I eat fruit or something else really fresh :) and watch movies on my laptop (the laptop is on a stool next to the bath) otherwise what do you do in there? You just sit there bored

MmmPinkTacos 11

Sunday 28 June 2015 0:11

In an odd twist of fate, OP became the ramen

EarlFug 19

Sunday 28 June 2015 0:12

Try again. You can do it!

lavieestbelle_fml 11

Sunday 28 June 2015 0:12

Nothing wrong with combining two pleasant activities!

karacakal2 30

Sunday 28 June 2015 0:14

You are watching too much Naruto it seems

glimmer980 20

Sunday 28 June 2015 0:18

Chicken flavor bath bomb?

False_Stupidity 41

Sunday 28 June 2015 0:24

While it sounds like an interesting combo, it's all too easy to end up with either soap flavoured ramen, or in this case ramen flavoured bath water. As #3 pointed out though, at least you'll smell yummy.

moo77_fml 20

Sunday 28 June 2015 0:46

You want to choose wisely next time... Pick a glass of wine in future lol

worldclassrager 39

Sunday 28 June 2015 0:58

Well maybe ramen before or after the bath?

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The Top

Today, I parked and noticed a car that was identical to mine across from me. I thought it was an amusing coincidence until I came back to find both cars trashed. At least the vandal realized their mistake and left a note saying, "You deserve it for having the same car as that cheater, asshole!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 409

You deserved it 2 826

Today, I get to add spaghetti sauce to my rather extensive list of things that don't belong in a person's eye but that end up in mine anyway. Other items include molten cheese, rock salt, orange juice, chips of nail polish, cotton fibers, and firework ash. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 111

You deserved it 5 027

The Top

Today, my mother accused me of stealing pills; she looked all over my room and couldn't find them. When she went back to the pantry, she saw them on the shelf below where they were supposed to be. She then accused me of putting them there while she was searching my room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 992

You deserved it 2 804

Today, I went to the bar because, I like to go to the bar every Saturday, but wearing a wedding ring so people wouldn't hit on me. But when I went this time, I forgot my ring and people still didn’t hit on me. So now I know it has nothing to do with the ring at all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 280

You deserved it 996

Today, I threw up when I woke up, feeling quite ill, I told my mum. She instantly thought I was pregnant. I'm still a virgin and she doesn't believe me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 151

You deserved it 3 545

Today, after reading a very emotional article about always letting your loved ones know how much you love them in case it's your last time seeing them, I went to my mom and told her how much I loved her and how thankful I was for everything. Her reply? "Shut up kid, Vince Vaughn is on Ellen". FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 989

You deserved it 4 564

Today, I received two cards in the mail for my late husband for his birthday. He has been dead for four years now, and the cards were from our two children, who live several states away. This is the fourth time it's happened, and neither of them answer my calls. Ever. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 424

You deserved it 3 787

Today, at a party, I watched the guy I've liked for AGES come out of a bedroom with one of my gay male friends. They were in there for a while. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 361

You deserved it 3 171