Health: Today, my mum thought it would be acceptable to tell my school...

By Anonymous - 08/09/2010 11:24 - United Kingdom

Today, my mum thought it would be acceptable to tell my school that the reason I will not be attending classes is because I have "the shits." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 725

You deserved it 3 236

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Same thing different taste

By TheHeirofTime - 15/08/2016 15:11 - United States - Marlborough

Today, I had to cancel an appointment due to diarrhea. I was so nervous that when the receptionist asked why, I told her, "I can't stop shitting." FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 251

You deserved it 1 730

I've known for ages

By Crap - 28/01/2010 05:01 - United States

Today, I went to the doctor for horrible stomach pains. He said I had an abnormal amount of stool in me, and that I'd need to flush it out. I called my mom and told her what happened, to which she responded, "I always knew you were full of shit, I didn't need a doctor to tell me that." FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 077

You deserved it 7 179

By poop - 21/03/2015 16:47 - United Kingdom - London

Today, I was at my Mandarin teacher's house. I had diarrhoea and had to go to the toilet. My mum texted me while I was still in the toilet saying, "We all heard you". FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 607

You deserved it 2 725

By Anonymous - 13/01/2012 00:59 - United States

Today, my mother called me a "wasteful child" because I threw up my lunch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 880

You deserved it 3 057

By danny5191 - 17/03/2012 02:21 - United Kingdom

Today, I had a nasty cough, but I went to college anyway. When I walked into class, I could practically smell menstrual blood in the air. After a few coughs, our instructor gave me an "Oh, shut up!" After half an hour, she kicked me out for not "taking the class seriously". FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 964

You deserved it 8 689

Not now!

By Anonymous - 18/04/2024 09:00 - United States

Today, my mom decided to infodump on me as I came home needing to take a shit. She wouldn't stop talking and calling me back when I tried to walk off. I couldn't get a word in, and she was ignoring my gestures. She's now calling me disrespectful because I finally ran off and dropped a loud one in the toilet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 416

You deserved it 76

Food poisoning

By brown and sticky - 16/01/2020 14:00 - United States - Baltimore

Today, I got food poisoning. After leaving class 4 times to poop, I sharted in the school bus on the ride home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 537

You deserved it 203

By goddamn chicken subs - 24/03/2016 16:51 - United States

Today, my brother and I got food poisoning because of the shady chicken subs we ate last night. Our mom thinks we're faking it and sent us to school anyway. I'm coming to you live from a school toilet while missing a test. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 844

You deserved it 1 653

By Kulcha - 13/02/2009 11:07 - Australia

Today, I was expelled from school. By my own mother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 422

You deserved it 40 437

By noname - 07/11/2010 04:04 - Canada

Today, I was mad at my mother. Why? We went to parent-teacher interviews, and she told my math teacher that she should allow bathroom breaks because I have a "very heavy menstrual flow." My teacher suggested I eat more red meat. They got into a seven-minute argument about this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 130

You deserved it 2 801

sweetcheeks0290 0

Wednesday 8 September 2010 19:03

Don't you just love parents?

TittiesOrGTFO 0

Wednesday 8 September 2010 19:01

omfg haha!!

Comments

bbyychula710 0

Wednesday 8 September 2010 22:25

wow thats embarrasinq well maybe you can make a joke out of all this in a couple yrs :)

PincheEdgarr 0

Wednesday 8 September 2010 22:26

lol I would never let my mum talk to the school

yahiko_fml 6

Wednesday 8 September 2010 22:29

lmao

UpYoursInAdvance 0

Wednesday 8 September 2010 23:14

Oy... only in the UK...

ElectricGhost_fml 5

Wednesday 8 September 2010 23:46

ahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

jazzyfresh 0

Thursday 9 September 2010 0:00

ahahahahahah

Emilyluvsyou 0

Thursday 9 September 2010 0:44

WIIIIN! your mom is AWESOME.

thegooseisloose 0

Thursday 9 September 2010 1:06

Yuh!

xdanixx 0

Thursday 9 September 2010 1:12

Hahaha shame

lovesteph3523 0

Thursday 9 September 2010 1:20

LMFAO! I love your mom!!

Keywords

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Today, so… you know how sometimes girls give the weird guys a chance and it works out beautifully and they marry, have kids, and live happily ever after. Yeah, didn’t work for me. I gave the weird guy from work a chance and he asked if he could lick my armpits on the first date. FML

I agree, your life sucks 553

You deserved it 119

Today, according to my husband of many years, he was actually planning to ghost me after our boring first date. It was only the fact that I shagged him senseless that night that kept him around long enough for us to actually get to know each other. Hooray for me being a "loose slut" back in 1998. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 139

You deserved it 561

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I agree, your life sucks 925

You deserved it 114

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I agree, your life sucks 1 801

You deserved it 202

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I agree, your life sucks 27 360

You deserved it 2 256

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I agree, your life sucks 63 893

You deserved it 4 067

Today, I told my fiancé he needed to spend at least one night a week at home with his daughter or we will pack up and leave. He responded by getting a suitcase. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 903

You deserved it 350

Today, school finally opened up using a hybrid schedule. Unfortunately, two of my teachers were quarantined and half of the school was on Zoom. I spent two hours in the library doing nothing with a mask on. Everyone else was on Zoom in bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 821

You deserved it 118

Same thing different taste

I've known for ages

Not now!

Food poisoning

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