Work: Today, my insane boss decided I poop too much. Now, every time...

By blakeintheoffice - 08/08/2012 13:53 - United States

Today, my insane boss decided I poop too much. Now, every time I go to the bathroom, he follows me in and tries to get me to hurry up by reading passages from 50 Shades of Grey. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 468

You deserved it 3 722

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
Find out how a day off can turn into a series of hilarious, unexpected events. More…

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Same thing different taste

Germaphobe

By AFSDALK:AFSDQWE - 23/11/2013 18:33 - United States - Hillsboro

Today, my boss made me cover for him by working two extra hours, because he had to rush home early to deal with an "emergency". The emergency was taking a shit, because he claims to have a phobia of doing them anywhere but at home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 130

You deserved it 3 799

By Anonymous - 16/10/2015 13:31 - United States

Today, I walked into the restroom at work to see my boss standing at the urinal, pissing like a toddler. He had his pants around his ankles, ass fully exposed. Now I'm never going to be able to take anything he says seriously. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 322

You deserved it 1 817

By Username - 21/03/2012 17:10 - United States - Brooklyn

Today, my boss recognized my shoes under the stall wall and had a conversation with me while we were both taking a dump. I had severe diarrhea. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 402

You deserved it 2 343

Make your mind up

By Jason Brazil - 13/08/2019 14:00

Today, my boss threatened to fire me because I'm unproductive, and haven't been doing anything. He doesn't tell me what to do, and expects me to read his mind. When I ask him what he wants me to do, he gets pissed and says that I should already know what to do. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 879

You deserved it 450

Not now, mate

By yuen - 16/06/2009 14:59 - Australia

Today, I went to take a shit and found my boss shaving in the toilet. While in the cubicle, he asked me about my work and the conversation lasted 15 minutes. I stayed in there even though I'd finished shitting after 5 minutes, during which 3 people heard my progress report while shitting next to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 595

You deserved it 4 737

By teaspoonzz - 25/10/2017 15:00

Today, I walked into the ladies' bathroom to find my male boss taking a dump with the stall door wide open. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 613

You deserved it 282

By NoPrivacy - 26/04/2012 10:44 - United States

Today, my boss overheard me singing, "I need a shit, I need a shit" on my way to the bathroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 169

You deserved it 34 719

By Ma_Nikka - 23/07/2015 19:00 - United States - Olivehurst

Today, my boss called me in to have a serious talk. The "serious talk" was him asking me to notify him of my menstrual cycle ahead of time so he can "avoid that shit". FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 173

You deserved it 2 900

By DingusGinger - 21/04/2019 02:00

Today, I found out my boss likes to shit talk about me when I'm not around. The best part is that I don't know what I've done to piss him off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 049

You deserved it 160

Creep in chief

By wow @ creepy fuckers - 17/11/2012 01:06 - United States

Today, yet again, my boss whined to me like a baby over being "friend-zoned" by his secretary. Not only does he basically stalk her and make her eat lunch with him every day, she's a lesbian in a committed relationship. He suspended me after I lost it and told him to see a fucking therapist. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 150

You deserved it 6 145

sidewaysponytail 0

Wednesday 8 August 2012 18:55

Maybe you should file a claim....

Savner 16

Wednesday 8 August 2012 19:10

50 shades of grey is a poorly written **** book based off of the characters in twilight that romanticizes abusive relationships. Yeah great book ._.

Comments

m3lyc 18

Wednesday 8 August 2012 23:08

I'd sit and listen, 50 Shades is great haha.

hateevryone 14

Wednesday 8 August 2012 23:23

What.....the.....f**k??

nvidioso 0

Wednesday 8 August 2012 23:39

I hear a lawsuit coming.

dsl1123 8

Wednesday 8 August 2012 23:45

You should ask your boss to at least read a book that you like.

mizzmarie13 1

Wednesday 8 August 2012 23:46

Ok, this ticks me off. Fifty shades of grey is absolutely nothing like twilight. You guys are idiots. Do not post if you do not know. Fifty shades of grey is about normal people that have weird sexual habits. Twilight is about vampires and has one sex scene that doesn't even go into detail

blair_x 12

Thursday 9 August 2012 0:39

I daresay Ana and Christian do not equate to being "normal people." Christian has some sort of superiority complex, and a jellyfish has more backbone than Ana does.

ballbearing 10

Thursday 9 August 2012 1:04

Fifty shades is some form o Twilight f fan fiction gone wrong. I haven't read it and don't care too but I was curious how it spun off from Twighlight... You are right- one glossed over sex scene in the entire series written for teenage girls which promotes abstinence before marriage equates to a poorly written semi **** series for bored middle age housewives?! How?

bassmaestro 10

Wednesday 8 August 2012 23:49

Troll Boss!

candiighal1121 14

Thursday 9 August 2012 0:44

Hahaha i wAnt that boon

183933 6

Thursday 9 August 2012 0:55

You should have said ... Hmmm another great example of how life imitates shitty art!

ballbearing 10

Thursday 9 August 2012 0:58

Pretty sure that would border on sexual harassment as well as possibly discrimination. My boss decides I vomited too much pregnant and was only going to let my use the washroom twice a day. HR informed her that they cannot legally monitor or regulate bathroom breaks, to do so is discrimination.