Valentine's slay, Living together and Intimacy: Today, my boyfriend wanted to have Valentine's Day sex. He then...

By DallasGal - 14/02/2012 16:31 - United States

Today, my boyfriend wanted to have Valentine's Day sex. He then remembered it was unlimited pancakes at IHOP. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 812

You deserved it 3 870

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Same thing different taste

No kinkshaming here

By Anonymous - 30/09/2012 04:37 - United States - Northridge

Today, my boyfriend told me he masturbates to the thought of me swimming in pancake syrup. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 086

You deserved it 5 776

Say yes

By fuckingdonuts - 18/05/2015 02:54 - United States - Edmond

Today, my boyfriend stopped in the middle of sex to ask if I wanted to get donuts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 057

You deserved it 5 182

By Eve - 24/06/2011 10:45 - Ireland

Today, as I passed my fiancé the pancakes I had just made, he vocalised his happiness with a groan that was EXACTLY like the one he makes when we have sex. So on a sexiness rating, I'm a pancake. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 088

You deserved it 10 722

By Anonymous - 07/02/2015 21:03 - United States - Edison

Today, it was my birthday. My boyfriend made me breakfast in bed, then we went out shopping, had a picnic, watched a good romcom, had a fancy dinner, and ended the day with great sex. And when the clock struck twelve, he dumped me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 431

You deserved it 3 534

By Anonymous - 13/01/2011 21:10 - Lebanon

Today, I was having sex with my fiancé when he stopped and said, "Boy, what I wouldn't give for a burger right now." FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 379

You deserved it 4 983

By AprilFlowers - 01/12/2009 17:15 - United States

Today, I woke up early and made my boyfriend french toast. When he woke up, he yelled at me because it was his dish day and I was creating more dishes for him to do. He made me do the dishes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 180

You deserved it 7 380

By jessica - 02/02/2011 20:59 - United States

Today, while my boyfriend and I were having sex, he stopped, got off, walked into the kitchen grabbed a doughnut, and came back to finish while he ate it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 356

You deserved it 7 464

I feel love

By Anonymous - 16/02/2024 08:00 - United Kingdom

Today, for Valentine’s Day, I got my boyfriend chocolates, a new Xbox game and planned lots of kinky sexy time. He ate the chocolate, orgasmed after three thrusts, had a 2-hour nap, then ignored me while playing the new game all afternoon. He didn’t get me anything, not even my own orgasm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 763

You deserved it 168

By still hungry - 21/04/2012 13:04 - United States - Chicago

Today, my boyfriend said he was going to give me breakfast in bed before he left. He walked over, threw some granola bars on the bed next to me and left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 320

You deserved it 4 146

By xxruby - 24/02/2015 21:07 - United States - Katy

Today, I worked my boyfriend's shift so he could stay home. I even brought him the free meal I got for helping out. Turns out he wanted to stay home so badly to cheat on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 426

You deserved it 3 548

hoolie06 0

Sunday 14 February 2010 20:00

So you couldn't have sex afterwards or before?

aricTB 0

Sunday 14 February 2010 20:00

pancakes! yay

Comments

perdix 29

Sunday 14 February 2010 21:27

Put syrup on your pussy and you can both be happy. My day would have gone: 1. Sex 2. Pancakes 3. If I'm not too bloated, more sex 4. More pancakes 5. Vomit 6. ????? 7. Profit

KurouTenshi 0

Sunday 14 February 2010 21:35

I'm watching a tv show about moms killing her kids, I read this and laughed out so hard...the best part was "profit" xD

CallMeHush 0

Sunday 14 February 2010 23:32

We never hit 7 on the other list either, he will be pleased.

FockinA 0

Sunday 14 February 2010 21:30

wow you must really suck in bed. that's a good idea, try a BJ once in a while.

gohabs21 0

Sunday 14 February 2010 21:37

this man has his priorities straight

EpicFMyLife 0

Sunday 14 February 2010 21:42

That's because he's obviously not a real man, who would have been thinking Arby's.

aardvarkish 15

Sunday 14 February 2010 21:43

see u all at IHOP!

aDerangedStateOf 0

Sunday 14 February 2010 21:45

Pancake sex? Best of Both Worlds in One...

sidvoltaire 0

Sunday 14 February 2010 21:48

holy shit it is? **** yeah

PhillyFox 0

Sunday 14 February 2010 21:58

You can have sex any day. But you can't get unlimited pancakes any day!

pluralbusted 0

Sunday 14 February 2010 22:03

unlimited pancakes aren't around forever...

cassdede 0

Sunday 14 February 2010 22:08

wow awesome boy friend

Keywords

Health Poopoo peepee Awkward Jewelry Family Kids Fight Love Relatable Students Work Animals Birds Sleep Noise Mental health Contraception Medication Racism Cheating Pregnancy Relationship advice Friends Teenagers Embarrassing Intimacy Sex Revenge Food Cats

The Top

Today, while I was showering, someone left a note on the bathroom door that read, "We can all hear you masturbating. Shut the hell up." I don't know what's more embarrassing, that everyone in my house thought I was masturbating or that I was actually singing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 052

You deserved it 372

Today, a guy for whom I did a design job told me he would only be able to pay me in 3 weeks. I told him that it was OK, as long as I didn't have to follow him around to collect my money. "Don't worry, I know the feeling," he said, "I used to run an illegal business." FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 513

You deserved it 2 171

The Top

Today, my boyfriend and I went to his best friend’s birthday party. He got her red roses, a necklace and $100 Victoria’s Secret Gift Card. This year he forgot my birthday, gave me a hug and told me to leave his apartment because he had homework to do. We’ve been together for two years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 432

You deserved it 228

Today, my friend used my phone to tag some of my overweight Facebook friends in a weight-loss video, along with the comment "Here's some motivation, fatasses!" I was able to delete the post, but not before I got a bunch of angry messages. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 732

You deserved it 2 606

Today, I was called stupid by a customer, after I supposedly got his order wrong. He then threw his ice cream cone on the floor, tracked it around the store, and left. While I was cleaning it up, he came back and tripped me right into the mop water, spilling it everywhere. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 962

You deserved it 127

Today, I was on my third date with this really cute girl. After a very romantic evening, I decided to go for the first kiss, but because of my nervous reflex in which I get bloody noses, I ended up bleeding all over her face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 599

You deserved it 4 895

Today, I found out why I’ve been covering most of the bills and the rent. Turns out my boyfriend is paying a very expensive OnlyFans subscription for his female bestie. When I confronted him about it, he responded by yelling, “It’s not like that!” and punched our glass patio door, shattering it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 471

You deserved it 233

Today, while building a gingerbread house with my two kids, they thought it would be funny to pee on it while I wasn't looking. Nobody noticed until my wife ate one of the pee-covered gingerbread men. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 254

You deserved it 982

Same thing different taste

No kinkshaming here

Say yes

I feel love

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