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By  Epsilonyx  |  15

10 years? And you're still his girlfriend? I think that may be the reason she referred to you as his friend. He either sucks at commitment or this is a very open relationship. Still a mean thing to do, of course.

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By  HotshotGG  |  0

Ten years and you're only just meeting his mother?

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  kyleekay  |  24

It has become apparent to me that reading comprehension is no longer a coveted skill. I remember how odd I thought it was when the high school I work for introduced a "Basic Reading Skills" course; the internet proves to me time and time again that it is unfortunately a necessity.

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  westcoastkp  |  13

I read it like this too. It happens. everyone should stop being uptight about it.

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  LegraMR  |  1

Maby you just weren't that important to the person you were being introduced to? I've been with my boyfriend for 2 years and been referred to as his friend when the stranger was simply one of his mothers friends who didn't really care.

By  Epsilonyx  |  15

10 years? And you're still his girlfriend? I think that may be the reason she referred to you as his friend. He either sucks at commitment or this is a very open relationship. Still a mean thing to do, of course.

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  Epsilonyx  |  15

Too many negative votes, comment buried. Show the comment

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  Dracoboxer357  |  35

22- One does not need a title (such as married, husband, wife) for companionship or love. Maybe they don't feel it really makes a difference in their relationship. *Shrugs*

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  kyleekay  |  24

Some couples view marriage simply as a piece of paper to represent what they feel for one another. A relationship that does not end in marriage is only fruitless to those who see value (for themselves) in the actual act of getting married; for couples who do not see the need to be married, I doubt they view their relationship any differently than a married couple would view their own.

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  solosohigh  |  15

some people have goals they want to accomplish before they get married. for example: finish college, buy a house, save money, etc. either way, it's not your or his mothers place to judge. also, the divorce rate is about 50%. they're smart to wait. shit happens.

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  Epsilonyx  |  15

I wasn't judging whatsoever, I was making an observation based on what I read. I don't care about their decision. I could care less, lol.

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  writergirl23  |  19

My husband and I got married because that was the only way our parents would let us live together (he was living separately being 22 at the time, but as I was 17 and 18 I was still living at home) peacefully. If course, we could have gone against it at the time, but we felt the better thing to do was wait. We even lost our virginity on our wedding night (been his best friend for ages, so we kinda know). While I understand some couples would think this a needless complication (and in some ways I do agree), this was what was right in our situation. But I do know that a lot of couples can't afford weddings- we could barely afford ours even with making it cheaper by making the wedding dress etc (helped that our parents helped hugely financially). Our parents helping financially was one huge reason to respect their wishes, not that they would have refused to pay regardless. But we did want a wedding.

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  Bibliovore  |  25

Yep; marriage is not necessary or even practical for everyone. My partner and I have been together 10 years. We have a house together. We're happy with each other and our relationship. We don't have to deal with a wedding, which thanks to one side's craziness would mean a stress nightmare and possibly some permanent estrangements (exactly what happened from the last wedding on that side of the family). And instead of "inlaws," we get to call each others' parents "outlaws." ;-)

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  hardehar  |  9

I hear you on that one! I love my partners family dearly, but half don't talk to each other, would be a logistical nightmare! If we get married, if, it will be parents and witnesses only.

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  Jaxx66  |  21

I've been with my bf for 8 years and we aren't married yet. We've spoken of it, but agreed that honestly we don't HAVE to get married. We are perfectly happy with each other and don't need a piece of paper to seal the deal. We may at some point.

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  EMTchic  |  14

I can understand where everyone is going with the "you don't HAVE to get married" thing, but (and this is just my opinion) if you really love someone, and want to spend the rest of your life with them, why wouldn't you want to make it official ? It's not like weddings have to be some huge deal, I mean, my parents got married at the courthouse, both in a t-shirt and jeans with only two friends as witnesses there . They didn't necessarily want to get married, they just decided it should be official . On the other hand, some people like me and my fiancé are planning on having a decent sized wedding . but what I mean is, it's weddings don't have to be some huge blown up deal, it is just to make a commitment official, and it comes with other benefits besides that, for instance many couples who plan on staying together but don't necessarily want to get married DO get married anyway for tax purposes (among other things).

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Completely agree with 99! Without being married, you have no legal rights toward your partner. If your partner is dying in the hospital, you have no say so at all because to the law, all you are is a friend. Also, the supposed 50% divorce rate isn't really accurate. This statistic simply takes the number of divorces and marriages that take place in a year rather than factoring the total number of married couples that exist in the country. The true divorce rate isn't that high.

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  CowgirlUp87  |  11

I absolutely adore my boyfriend, but we have no plans on getting married anytime soon due to financial reasons. At 34, his credit is not the greatest. I am 24 and have been working to fix what credit I did mess up on, so my credit is fairly decent. If we were to get married we couldn't buy a new vehicle or a house. So as much as I love him and would love to be his wife, our life would be less stressful knowing my credit is getting better and better if and when we need it. Also, my aunt had a significant other with some serious disease. If they had got married, he would have stopped receiving his disability. He passed away a couple years ago, but they enjoyed over 20 years together without a piece of paper. RIP Uncle Jan

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  Holydiving  |  3

Maybe they don't want to get married? Marriage is a binding and what their doing is that they can leave anytime, that shows more commitment then getting married by elvis in vegas for $5.

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  LegraMR  |  1

Maby they started dating at a young she and marriage isn't appropriate? They could've started dating at 13 and wanted to wait till after college

By  kyleekay  |  24

Hopefully it was just a slip of the tongue, OP. If not, then just remember your boyfriend introducing you as his girlfriend is much more important than how his mother feels about you.

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  kyleekay  |  24

Why thank you, good sir! I just know how pointless it is to be overly concerned about what your significant other's family thinks of you. It's always more trouble than it's worth. You can still be happy with your significant other, despite outside opinions.

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  gmc_blossom  |  21

46- This is totally irrelevant to anything important, but I must say this. I've seen a lot of your comments so far and none have been thumbed down. Congratulations on getting your points across without people disliking your comments. 0.o Sorry for this pointless post.

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  kyleekay  |  24

92- I still feel like such an asshole for that! Argh, haha. I really do my best to avoid being a bitch to people, unless they are utterly incompetent. And 65, thank you! I used to get thumbed down more when I would hastily post comments without much thought; I've found when I actually think before I speak, the outcome is much better. ;)

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  EvilDave  |  13

the OP is just a friend. And, regardless of what your foolish ass thinks, marriages is much more than a piece of paper. It conveys legal rights. That 10 year relationship means absolutely nothing if he gets hurt and is unconcious in the hospital or if he drops dead without a will and his mother decides the OP gets nothing.

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  Keliosan  |  6

144- Regardless of what your foolish ass thinks , not everyone needs a marriage to validate their relationship. Also by your own logic kyleekay isn't foolish because she herself is married... As sure as you seem to be that everything they own is in the boyfriends I doubt that it's true so while the death or sever injury of a loved one is awful i don't think they set up their financials to crumble if something happens to OPs bf and her in-laws decide to be douches.

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