Work: Today, I started my new job at a haunted house. I figured I'd...

By Anonymous - 13/06/2015 15:47 - United States - Cabot

Today, I started my new job at a haunted house. I figured I'd change clothes when I got home, since my bloody shirt and zombie makeup were blatantly just an outfit. I barely made it 10 minutes before I was pinned to the ground at gunpoint, cuffed, and needing new underwear. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 251

You deserved it 2 884

May Day: Lily of the Valley and Misunderstandings
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Same thing different taste

Gottem

By Anonymous - 04/05/2014 21:07 - Czech Republic - Prague

Today, it's my first day working the graveyard shift at a local hotel. My new boss thought it would be hilarious to sneak up behind me while dressed like the Grim Reaper. I screamed like a little girl and soaked my pants. Apparently he does this to all the new people. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 759

You deserved it 6 716

By Anonymous - 24/10/2009 00:40 - United States

Today, I was working a haunted house. I have a really good spot where I hide and scare people. This really hot guy was walking up, and I jumped out and screamed. He punched me in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 532

You deserved it 7 391

By Anonymous - 21/10/2010 21:44 - Canada

Today, l was crouched on the ground in the doorway at a haunted mansion. It's part of my job here to scare the people passing by. A 12 year-old girl walked by, I grabbed her leg, and she kicked me in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 977

You deserved it 41 803

By keiran123 - 27/06/2013 23:15 - United States - Welsh

Today, on my first day at my new job delivering pizzas, I got bit by a guy dressed as Dracula. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 280

You deserved it 3 331

By Anonymous - 05/02/2010 08:23 - France

Today, I was working as a clown (Pennywise) in a haunted maze. A bunch of drunk guys came in and started breaking props. I decided to stay still and follow through with the scare. I ended up getting kicked in a very sensitive area. The security guard just laughed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 895

You deserved it 4 359

By worldsbestjobgonebad - 19/10/2009 06:08 - Canada

Today, I was walking home from my acting gig at a haunted hayride. Even after spending lots of time washing the fake blood off my hands and face, I looked like I'd murdered someone. Perhaps that's why an officer stopped me and questioned me about a stabbing that happened earlier tonight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 043

You deserved it 4 141

Whoops

By Teen - 24/01/2009 23:28 - United States

Today, I was trying on clothes in a store that had just screens set up for changing. As I took off the first pair of pants had I tried on, my foot got hooked in the cuff and I fell out in my underwear in front of the whole store. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 124

You deserved it 3 010

By Pwnedofthedead - 03/10/2009 15:34 - Canada

Today, I was walking to my friends Halloween themed birthday party in my zombie costume. Apparently, my crazy coke addicted neighbor found the costume too realistic. He tackled me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 799

You deserved it 3 789

By dorrisdoes - 28/07/2014 20:47 - New Zealand

Today, while working an early shift, I was dressing a wound on a gorgeous guy, when he laughed and pointed out some granny panties next to me on the floor. I guess I forgot to take yesterday's underwear out of my pants before putting them back on this morning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 313

You deserved it 10 171

Exhaustion

By Shell - 05/03/2009 07:14 - United States

Today, I was working at Chuck-E-Cheese. If that isn't enough, I was put in the mouse costume. Due to the disgusting hot smell and atmosphere in the costume, I fainted in front of a birthday party. I awoke to a little boy screaming who then kicked me in the face and ran. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 395

You deserved it 4 419

ChloeRattlehead 22

Sunday 14 June 2015 6:15

Well, we know now that we can trust those cops to save us during the apocalypse.

oyeh 19

Sunday 14 June 2015 6:12

I thought they were supposed to teach Common Sense at the academy? Guess they forgot too.

Comments

Dexter83_fml 17

Sunday 14 June 2015 7:25

Braaaaiiins

MandieL 27

Sunday 14 June 2015 8:03

If a zombie apocalypse were to occur, does it need to be near October to be considered proper? Things that go bump in the night are applicable all year long, not just around Halloween. That sucks OP, as much as I find it normal for a haunted house to exist in June, I would be a bit alarmed seeing someone covered in blood looking like they just got out of a bad fight walking down the street outside of the zombie walk or Halloween.

AnonymousZOMBIE 12

Friday 19 June 2015 0:53

i guess its because of all the stupid kids trying to prank others that a zombie apocalypse is happening. so the cops just don't bother anymore and instead cuff anyone trying to be funny....IDK it's a guess...

lexiieeex3 32

Sunday 14 June 2015 8:05

This definitely needs context and a follow up wow cops are assholes.

candyolympics 17

Sunday 14 June 2015 9:21

Not all cops are assholes. Most of them are actually good at their job, however the bad ones are the only ones we hear about.

nitrog100 21

Sunday 14 June 2015 8:10

Sue the everliving s*** out of the department. They had no right to attack you like that.

WOTAN1488 24

Sunday 14 June 2015 8:50

Sounds kinky and gross. FYL

ChloeMeyers_Xo 16

Sunday 14 June 2015 8:51

Geez, you must have really made an impression.

AviKerensky 17

Sunday 14 June 2015 8:57

#17 Shock will cause a person to do odd things.

Unbearable_fml 21

Sunday 14 June 2015 9:03

It's June.

lilchica22001 22

Sunday 14 June 2015 9:30

It would have been cool if the cop that got you was Rick Grimes :) The Walking Dead...sorta! Lol

allforfun 23

Sunday 14 June 2015 9:42

I'm gonna call bullshit here. If someone is found bloody the cops call EMS for an evaluation. EMS would quickly figure out there's nothing wrong (we're good at that) and the only reason to end up cuffed would be for another offense.