Miscellaneous: Jumpy

Jumpy

By Chelsea - 21/04/2009 05:20 - United States

Today, my mom made me clean. I was dusting in the living room and heard gunshots outside the apartment. I dove on the floor and started crying and screaming. My mom walked in and informed me that the sound was her making popcorn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 689

You deserved it 71 079

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Same thing different taste

By almost_a_pro - 23/04/2015 13:43 - Brazil - Rio De Janeiro

Today, I was home alone and tried to make some popcorn so I could watch a movie. Thirty minutes later, my parents came home and found me talking to the firemen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 088

You deserved it 9 076

Nice…

By MexyBoy - 11/06/2019 16:08

Today, I wanted to do something nice for my mom. So, while she was sleeping, I cleaned the whole house for her and even made her breakfast. A few minutes later, she came downstairs and yelled at me to keep it down because she was trying to sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 878

You deserved it 293

By frenchpop1960 - 23/02/2009 21:58 - United States

Today, I was over at my boyfriend's house and I heard a strange sound. I laughed and said, "It sounds like a dog throwing up!" He listened for a second and said "That's my mom crying downstairs." FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 370

You deserved it 41 843

Isn't it ironic, don't you think?

By Anonymous - 06/09/2019 20:03

Today, my mom complained that I was being too loud, and she smacked my head really hard. All while screaming at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 491

You deserved it 169

By We're still popping them - 27/02/2015 00:35 - United States - Fremont

Today, the neighbors called the cops because they heard "gun shots". My girlfriend and I were popping bubble wrap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 658

You deserved it 2 878

Private freakout

By emmy - 03/06/2022 00:00

Today, the neighbors called the cops on us because they heard a series of loud screams. No, no one was being murdered, but my mom found one of my socks in the laundry room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 851

You deserved it 159

By Dx - 06/03/2011 07:18 - United States

Today, I was babysitting for my usual. After putting the baby to sleep I put some popcorn in the microwave and went to the bathroom. When I came out the whole kitchen was filled with smoke. One of the neighbors saw and called 911. I'm out of a job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 229

You deserved it 34 880

I am hungry

By Hungry - 23/12/2019 01:00

Today, I thought my mother was coming into my room to give me lunch. She gave me cleaning supplies instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 650

You deserved it 3 154

By leastitwasntsurpriseanal - 22/08/2014 20:26 - Canada - Edmonton

Today, I woke up to a blood-curdling scream from the living room. I jumped up and went running, only to find out it was my mother, who'd screamed at some dramatic plot twist in a Sex and the City episode. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 368

You deserved it 3 503

By Anonymous - 24/09/2011 16:15 - United States

Today, my mom and I heard a thump from inside the coat closet. I opened the door, and something fell on me. My mom, who was behind me, screamed, closed the laundry room door, and ran into the garage, leaving me to face the alleged attacker. It was the vacuum. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 281

You deserved it 2 866

shaBAMalex 0

Tuesday 21 April 2009 16:04

Calm down. Lol.

nomadxx7 0

Tuesday 21 April 2009 16:05

Gunshots =/= popcorn Come out the country. I'll show you what gunshots sound like

Comments

shaBAMalex 0

Tuesday 21 April 2009 16:04

Calm down. Lol.

loodles 0

Saturday 20 March 2010 3:25

overreact much.

b182link 0

Monday 21 June 2010 19:46

you live in alabama

mells105 0

Tuesday 3 August 2010 22:36

talk about anxiety

Ryzaki 0

Sunday 22 August 2010 8:30

I think s/he has no idea what a real gun shot sounds like.

ximenita0731 0

Sunday 3 July 2011 8:07

YDI for not knowingg the difference if soundss!!!

MrsDruidess 23

Thursday 5 December 2013 8:26

idiot!!

Horde 8

Tuesday 21 April 2009 16:04

You mistook gunshots to popcorn? lol

nomadxx7 0

Tuesday 21 April 2009 16:05

Gunshots =/= popcorn Come out the country. I'll show you what gunshots sound like

isaiaha11 2

Wednesday 1 September 2010 4:39

win!

michellenKG 5

Monday 2 April 2012 17:14

is that a death threat?

A7X5989 0

Tuesday 21 April 2009 16:05

really?

Rockey 3

Tuesday 21 April 2009 16:06

Either this is fake or you live in the suburbs.

SophiaMay 0

Tuesday 21 April 2009 16:06

How stressy are you?

ozymandias_fml 0

Tuesday 21 April 2009 16:07

You might want to move out of the ghetto....

Epic_Fail_Sauce 0

Tuesday 21 April 2009 16:07

O_O That must be some fricken loud popcorn

Makadog 0

Wednesday 14 March 2012 7:35

Haha!!!!

angelsnarrows 0

Tuesday 21 April 2009 16:08

high.strung.

dd3_fml 0

Tuesday 21 April 2009 16:10

how the hell could you think popcorn was gunshots?

duke_nukem_25299 0

Sunday 18 July 2010 0:12

were gunshots you fat f*ck!

Keywords

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The Top

Today, I was working at the pharmacy and had a older man come in. He was buying Viagra and, by law, we are required to ask if the patient had any questions. His lovely response was, "When you coming over so I can test this stuff out?" His wife and daughter thought it was hilarious. I could've died. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 846

You deserved it 635

Today, I was driving to visit my parents for the first time in two years. After spending about $4000 to make sure my car wouldn't break down on the journey, around the halfway point, the front tire popped and the engine blew out. I'm about 5 states away from both my parents and my home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 732

You deserved it 489

The Top

Today, my wife is very insistent that we try to get our boys more involved in her religion, starting with church tomorrow morning. She foolishly trusts our boys to behave. They really don’t want to go and I’m convinced they’re plotting something bad, like real bad, the devious little hooligans. FML

I agree, your life sucks 347

You deserved it 226

Today, I accidentally cut myself while slicing some sponge cake. My husband's first reaction was to ask if the cake had gotten bloody or not. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 649

You deserved it 4 740

Today, as a kindergarten music teacher, my principal came in to observe and evaluate me. I thought I'd gotten the hang of managing 23 5-year-olds, but it was a zoo the whole 30 minutes and I didn’t manage to teach anything. I'm not sure I'll be keeping this job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 462

You deserved it 366

Today, my mother dragged me to the mall to get me out of the house and to get me to stop using my phone. She then spent the whole trip talking on her phone instead of actually interacting with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 944

You deserved it 2 358

Today, my wife is leaving me for the guy she told me not to worry about, who is also her ex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 070

You deserved it 109

Today, I have to wake up in 3 hours for work, the medicine that should've made me sleep 8 hours straight failed and I woke up an hour later, not being able to sleep anymore. FML

I agree, your life sucks 876

You deserved it 63

Jumpy

Same thing different taste

Nice…

Isn't it ironic, don't you think?

Private freakout

I am hungry

Top comments

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