Intimacy: Classic - FML

Classic

By horriblegf - 26/02/2011 12:18 - United States

Spicy

Today, I realized it feels better when I sneeze than when my boyfriend and I have sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 652

You deserved it 5 948

Mother's Day: Sweets and Bummers
Between disastrous breakfasts in bed and unusual gifts, Mother's Day is an inexhaustible source of laughter. More…

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Same thing different taste

By sneezeattack - 14/05/2012 05:27 - United States - Aurora

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend got so happy when he thought he'd finally given me an orgasm. I was covering an urge to sneeze. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 022

You deserved it 4 303

Do it again

By thornrose22 - 01/11/2009 00:22 - United States

Today, my boyfriend went down on me for the first time. After about five minutes, he sneezes violently on me. I don't know what's worse, him getting snot all over my intimate bits or the fact that the sneeze felt better then what he was doing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 223

You deserved it 3 198

By SierraDiaz2097 - 23/03/2013 05:44 - United States - Vardaman

Today, I sneezed. My boyfriend told me to shut up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 615

You deserved it 9 660

That'll do it

By Zippyzoo - 03/02/2009 22:16 - United States

Spicy

Today, when my boyfriend was about to orgasm, I suddenly sneezed all over his face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 335

You deserved it 9 125

By WorstMedicalBill - 20/11/2009 14:53 - United States

Spicy

Today, my girlfriend and I were getting it on when I realized I had to sneeze. Not wanting to sneeze on her, I tried my hardest to hold it in. When I climaxed, I couldn't hold it in any more and sneezed all over her face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 180

You deserved it 21 832

By Anonymous - 08/07/2012 11:26 - Australia

Today, I witnessed my boyfriend sneeze in his hands, and then lick it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 107

You deserved it 3 496

By Achoo - 15/10/2009 07:07 - United States

Today, I was making out with a guy I really like. Midway through, he stopped and said he had to sneeze. After waiting several seconds, he said the urge went away and we kept making out. Ten seconds later, he violently sneezed in my open mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 894

You deserved it 5 125

You coming?

By snotface - 23/04/2009 19:47 - United States

Spicy

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend. She started panting harder and going, "AH, AH, AH..." and I thought she was about to come. Next thing I know, there's snot splattered all over my face and neck. Turns out it was a sneeze. FML

I agree, your life sucks 76 791

You deserved it 8 863

By Anonymous - 08/12/2016 14:53

Spicy

Today, during sex, I somehow sneezed hard enough to really hurt my neck and shoulder. But don't worry, writhing in pain doesn't ruin the mood. My boyfriend just kept going. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 791

You deserved it 1 381

Take what you can

By omglifee - 20/12/2009 04:13 - Canada

Spicy

Today, I sneezed seven times in a row. That's the closest thing I've had to an orgasm in months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 901

You deserved it 4 123

Next

Top comments

4Lonely2Stoner0 0

Saturday 26 February 2011 21:50

Why the hell don't women just tell a man what pleases them. it's a simple solution

Doortje 29

Saturday 26 February 2011 20:52

Try sneezing while putting in a tampon. That should be an even better ******!

Comments

doublelove77 0

Sunday 25 September 2011 0:43

Scientifically, sneezing is a form or an orgasim

bradytown 0

Sunday 13 November 2011 17:09

You ungrateful bitch! At least you get something!

amberwarr11 1

Sunday 22 January 2012 12:42

I love to sneeze. Next best thing to using Q tips in my ear. I call it an eargasm

SomeAnonymousBro 4

Sunday 29 January 2012 14:37

Wow. Hope he reads this. (and yes, I know he wouldn't know it was her)

devonisthebest 7

Sunday 22 July 2012 17:39

N

LucianDracul 8

Friday 17 October 2014 21:27

sounds like you both aren't doing something right. try using your muscles If he's really that small or something. both people gotta work to make it fun.

Starham1 14

Sunday 15 March 2015 4:44

Believe it or not, your nose is actually connected to the pleasure center of your brain. Under some medications, sneezing can even cause orgasms.

iHyperModz 22

Thursday 1 October 2015 8:10

I have a problem which makes my nose bleed sometimes when I sneeze. Sounds like you got the better life

Keywords

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The Top

Today, my ex asked me to return a sweater he'd gifted me back in the day. He didn’t even thank me, just said he’d catch me at lunch but never did. Work was tedious yet even then I didn’t leave without shooting him a goodbye text, only for him to say, “Oh my bad, I already left.” I still love him but it’s clearly one-sided. FML

I agree, your life sucks 314

You deserved it 588

Today, I was rudely stopped in the park by a woman screaming at me for being a slut for having a baby so young. She got so worked up that she started swearing. Not only was I just babysitting for a friend, I am unable to get the toddler to stop swearing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 967

You deserved it 3 122

The Top

Today, I almost crashed my car because I was checking out an Old Navy mannequin wearing a bra. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 587

You deserved it 50 924

Today, my new dog broke out of his new crate, ate my door, pissed on the floor, and trashed my room. I got him to help with my anxiety, but all he does is give me more anxiety. The worst part is that I adopted him as a favor to a friend, because she couldn’t handle him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 733

You deserved it 1 168

Today, and for the past two weeks, I decided to try online gaming, as it's something I've never done before. I already have a creep stalking me because I mentioned I was single and he's a horny virgin. Remind me never to talk about my lack of love life online again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 826

You deserved it 1 182

Today, I'm officially at the point where I would do literally anything to have a pleasant dream, or at least one that's not absolutely fucking terrifying. I now know where the irrational fear of sleeping comes from. Anxiety can go fuck a duck. FML

I agree, your life sucks 702

You deserved it 92

Today, I was told by my wife that she was moving in with her mother, because I was causing her to have panic attacks. She said she still loves me and wants to be with me, but she needs a few months to herself. I have given her her way for most of our marriage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 620

You deserved it 310

Today, I told my parents I was pregnant but don’t know who the Dad is. My Mom said “that’s alright, I still don’t know who your dad is”. So apparently my father isn’t my real Dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 860

You deserved it 1 190