Today, I was sitting on the wooden edge of my coffee table watching my sister's boyfriend play Halo 2, when I leaned back to stretch and shattered the center pane of glass in the table. I now have a large gash in my ass. FML
I agree, your life sucks (1117) - you totally deserved it (3969)
On 02/08/2010 at 7:32pm - misc - by Kaganate (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I noticed that my neighbor's house has a clear view of my daughter's bathroom. There is a telescope in his window. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6742) - you totally deserved it (384)
On 02/08/2010 at 7:28pm - misc - by disasterbutton (woman) - United States (Virginia)
Today, I found out that the necklace my boyfriend gave me for my birthday was actually a gift he'd given to his ex girlfriend. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7730) - you totally deserved it (659)
On 02/08/2010 at 3:24pm - love - by Chrissy (woman) - United States (California)
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me, saying I was immature for making gay jokes all the time. A few hours later, I got six texts and three calls from guys I didn't know. It turns out, she put my name and number on Craigslist as a gay man seeking a relationship. FML
I agree, your life sucks (2872) - you totally deserved it (12571)
On 02/08/2010 at 3:21pm - love - by christian9294 - United States (Ohio)
Today, I visited my grandmother who has dementia. She thought I was my father, and proceeded to tell me that I should never have married my mother, let alone have had children with her. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8133) - you totally deserved it (449)
On 02/08/2010 at 2:30pm - misc - by dmachin - Sent from a mobile version
Today, I woke up with a hangover from last night. Last night, I snuck out and went to a party at a club. To hide my hangover, I cleaned myself up and walked into the kitchen to get a drink. My mother looked at me and said, "What's that on your wrist?" I'd forgotten I'd left the wristband on from the club. I'm already grounded. FML
I agree, your life sucks (1263) - you totally deserved it (13386)
On 02/08/2010 at 2:29pm - misc - by Tucker (man) - United States (Arizona)
Today, while on my way to the break room, it seemed as if everyone was staring at me and giving me odd looks. I asked my friend, "Did I get prettier overnight or something?" She answered, "No, your shirt is just see-through." FML
I agree, your life sucks (2730) - you totally deserved it (8058)
On 02/08/2010 at 1:24pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I got ice cream with a guy I'd met at a wrestling match a few days ago. When I got home, I found out that my mother had been sitting in the parking lot and watched us through the windows. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8538) - you totally deserved it (617)
On 02/08/2010 at 1:23pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)
Today, my dad and I had an argument. Then we went outside to shovel the snow out of the driveway. I heard him yelling and figured he was just yelling at me some more, so I turned my iPod up so I couldn't hear him anymore. Turns out he had fallen, cracked a rib, and needed help up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (3244) - you totally deserved it (12842)
On 02/08/2010 at 10:19am - misc - by skinsfan7592 (man) - United States (Virginia)
Today, my wife told me that she wants a divorce. Apparently, I'm taking too long to forgive her for having an affair. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17173) - you totally deserved it (987)
On 02/08/2010 at 9:18am - love - by DD - Sent from a mobile version
Today, my boss asked me if I could work on Valentine's Day because there was no chance of me having a date. She's right. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12426) - you totally deserved it (873)
Today, I was having a very realistic dream about a hot guy. Just as he was leaning in to ravish me, I was rudely awakened by the sound of my husband farting and snorting at the same time. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10532) - you totally deserved it (4110)
On 02/08/2010 at 6:24am - love - by dreamteam (woman) - United States
Today, I entered the crowded bus and one man sitting in the priority seat glanced at me. Upon seeing my protruding tummy, he quickly offered me his seat. I took the seat. I am not pregnant. FML
I agree, your life sucks (3836) - you totally deserved it (10197)
On 02/08/2010 at 5:52am - health - by preggers (woman) - United Kingdom (Bristol)
