123pepper

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123pepper's favorite FMLs

By Nikki - 05/04/2009 03:40 - United States

Today, I was in IKEA, furniture shopping with my dad. He was looking at one couch that was particularly small. I said "dad that couch is for like a midget." I look over to see a midget looking at me, sitting on the same couch in a different color. He definitely heard me. FML

agreeclassic 28 797

vote type 1 67 529

By Anonymous - 18/10/2010 04:10 - Canada

Today, my boyfriend described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur.' FML

agreeclassic 14 247

vote type 1 39 353

By Anonymous - 17/10/2010 05:55 - United States

Today, I saw my boyfriend shaving his pubic hair before we had sex. This would be fine, except he was saying "Nom nom nom, I eat cock hairs" to his electric razor. FML

agreeclassic 43 999

vote type 1 8 835

By married - 16/10/2010 12:31 - United States

Today, my sister and I were both on Facebook, updating our statuses. I set mine to "just got released from hospital with Baby Lily", as I'd had a baby earlier this week. My sister set hers to "menstrual blood smells like shrimp". Her status got 37 likes. Mine got none. FML

agreeclassic 38 568

vote type 1 7 273

By CrappyValentine - 14/02/2012 18:56 - Netherlands

Today, I tried convincing my Valentine-hating boyfriend to send me a card, by explaining how important it is to me. He finally agreed and sent me a card. I opened it up, and it wished me 'harmony and well-being on Lupercalia'. What is Lupercalia? It's an ancient Roman festival where men run down the street naked, whipping people with goat skins to encourage fertility. FML

agreeclassic 11 378

vote type 1 37 918