Today, while on an escalator, instead of just telling me my underwear label was hanging out of my jeans, a woman behind me decided to tuck the label in herself. You should never have to feel a stranger's finger on your butt crack. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I went to the bathroom and didn't realize my skirt was tucked in my ugliest underwear until I reached the elevator. Thanks for not telling me girl-in-the-yellow-shirt. FML
Today, while I was on the up escalator, a small woman in front of me farted directly into my face. FML
Today, I was out walking downtown. A woman walking behind the thought that my pants were hanging too low. She came over to me and yanked my pants up. FML
Today, I was putting on my new pair of jeans, when my girlfriend walked in. She found the "XS" size sticker on the side of my pants, held it for a little while then put it on my crotch. She then looked at me, gave a little shrug and half-smile and walked away. FML
Today, I tried to discreetly fix a wedgie while walking into a crowded store. Right as I yanked my waistband, the automatic doors opened and revealed a full line of people staring directly at me mid-adjustment. FML
Today, my friend decided to pants me in the middle of the mall. I wasn't wearing underwear. FML
Today, a woman had a wardrobe malfunction right in front of me. As if that's not awkward enough, that woman was my own mother. FML
Today, whilst in a dressing room trying on some new clothes, I experienced the sheer terror of having someone fling a pair of dirty panties over the stall wall only to make off with some stolen ones, whilst you're still standing there in shock staring at another woman's dirty underwear. FML
Today, I was riding up an escalator in the mall in uncomfortable high heels. While adjusting my bag I suddenly lost my balance and began flailing wildly. In desperation I hurled forward and ended up grabbing a teenage boy's buttocks and was promptly slapped by his girlfriend. FML
Today, I was traveling. At airport security, the woman patting me down felt something "down there" and asked me what I was wearing. I told her it was a sanitary napkin. She put her hands inside my pants just to be sure. FML
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Top comments
camsterjoe 12
Some people would be delighted to have that sort of action.
Dracoboxer357 36
Butt I'll bet you'll never forget to check for it from now on, will you? ;)
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Comments (120)
RedPillSucks 33
She's hot for your spot.
mangoboy1 19
Sexual harassment charges?
xxGheTToGumbYxx 16
You have to be kidding.
laden_swallow09 35
I don't think you know what sexual harassment is.
MzZombicidal 36
Those words you're using, I don't think they mean what you think they mean.
perdix 31
Different strokes for different folks.
olpally 33
Haha. That's creepy as ****! Weirdness level::: 1,000,000.
HortonThelephant 15
I think you meant: Heightened expeditiously :)
HortonThelephant 15
Did you also get a Grab Down Under?
Dave_Davington 34
Sounds like you had a cracking good time.
slmchicd12 23
I'll bet she has kids and just tucked it out of reflex. She was just trying to be helpful.
perdix 31
#27, I'm a dad and a pretty "hands-y" guy, but I've never developed a reflex sticking my finger in a child's butt crack. I'm not sure that excuse is going to fly.
perdix 31
#1, nah, most of the patrons are going for the frontcrack.
KawaiiCupcake 14
How thoughtful of her xD