Today, I was traveling. At airport security, the woman patting me down felt something "down there" and asked me what I was wearing. I told her it was a sanitary napkin. She put her hands inside my pants just to be sure. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was going through airport security. Trying to get things over and done with quickly, I dropped my pants without a second thought. Turns out they just wanted me to remove my shoes and belt. FML
Today, I was walking through airport security when a guard began making lewd gestures at his crotch, while looking at me. I was outraged until I realized he was trying to tell me that my fly was down. FML
Today, I was boarding my flight when I got pulled aside for looking suspicious. As she was opening my bag, I said, "Be careful, I jammed so many clothes in there it may explode." I was then strip searched for my trouble. FML
Today, I was going through airport security. As my bags were being scanned, I was told that I was selected for extra searching. Right as the security guard was about to frisk me, he froze up and asked me, "You're a male, right?" I am, and I used to think that it was obvious. FML
Today, I was standing at airport security. One of the bag inspectors asked me to remove my travel pouch, pointing to the lump under my shirt. I didn't know how to tell him that it was just one of my fat rolls. FML
Today, I bought a box of tampons and went to the store restroom to insert one. I then put the box inside my purse. On my way out, I got stopped by security, who yelled at me to empty my purse. He grabbed my bag, spilling the tampons everywhere. Apparently, he thought I was stealing. FML
Today, the airport security guard told me to lift my fat rolls so he could finish patting me down. FML
Today, while going through airport security the lady asked why I folded everything so small. I said that I was going away for a month and needed to fit a lot of stuff in only one bag. She smiled, nodded and then dumped my luggage to search for "drugs and other illegal teen things." FML
Today, as I was crossing to the US, I got pulled over by border patrol for looking "suspicious". The female cop searched my purse and found a condom. She smirked and said, "I doubt you'd ever need that." FML
Today, I was getting a flight home. I'd worn a belt because my skirt was too big. When I walked through security, they asked me to remove my belt. My skirt fell down in front of everyone. FML
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Top comments
ab290 10
what was she expecting, an AK47 in your ******?
iseebearbears 27
It's probably more of an FML for her since she had to touch your menstrual blood as part of her job.
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Comments (77)
Benmantha 31
I guess it wasn't sanitary anymore after that.
iseebearbears 27
It's probably more of an FML for her since she had to touch your menstrual blood as part of her job.
satanistxxangel 8
I'm guessing the security person didn't shove her hand that deep. Probably just an edge touch
anonymuse_fml 31
Feeling for the pad doesn't mean she stuck her hand down the OPs panties as well as her pants. She could have felt the outside of the underwear.
lysx84 24
Ah, but is op using American or British English when using the word "pants"?
allie2590 31
Nope I'd say having someone put their hands down your pants is worse.
nemcali 34
She didn't have to, did she?
SexyMexi21 23
The perks of being a woman... (Sigh)
ab290 10
what was she expecting, an AK47 in your ******?
why57why 21
More than likely drugs not guns
cj89898 24
Somebody was arrested for having a revolver in their ******
SZamir 7
OP here: I have a Pakistani passport, so maybe that is exactly what she was expecting :)
LyricaSilvan 30
Back on the Fourth of July this year, there was a story about a woman who tried to smuggle fireworks out of a Walmart in her ******. Somehow the thing got set off and she ended up with some pretty serious burns. Anyway, the point is that people will try all kinds of weird shit to smuggle stuff. You'd be surprised.
mermaidgirle 12
How in the hell did a firework start inside a ******?
LyricaSilvan 30
I honestly have no idea.
ab290 10
@OP You and me both :D
TheNewGuy03 29
57: Because she had that fire pussy
wanted_2_want 40
Plot twist: the TSA agent was a lesbian looking for a quick release. But seriously, being pat down that intimately is not fun. Sorry OP.
FreckledSatan 17
Honestly, shut up
Rexsace102 5
Why is this post in the negatives
rachael_king_11 16
I just died laughing
bambisapphic 18
because lesbians are sex offenders, we can't get a consensual "release", and touching someone's pad gives us sexual satisfaction. yikes!
Attacksloth 33
Worst trip to the airport. Period.
manofmerr 27
Ha!
r1has 28
Wtf, I didn't know they had ramped up airport security that much. Just ewwww
ilovebono88 21
9/11? Seriously?
Baron_Kaz 15
This is in Pakistan ...
KaylaTackett 18
Are they allowed to do that?? Seems inappropriate to me.
tj4234 36
Yeah. They can be pretty strict. I flew out of a small airport two years ago in the UK where they strip searched every passenger.
602offroad 12
Rude! It's dinner and a drink first at the very least!