Today, my mom was going through the newspaper and cutting out coupons for me to use. She hands me two of them, one for tampons and the other for a pregnancy test, saying, "Well, you're gonna need one or the other this month." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my mother told me she needed a urine sample to send in to the doctors to test for any allergies. I did what she had asked and went to my room. I came down stairs later and found her in the bathroom putting my pee on a pregnancy test stick. FML
Today, while in the store with my kids, they wanted to buy tampons because I am "getting cranky, and it should be that time of the month." FML
Today, my mom noticed that there weren’t any tampons in the trashcan during my usual time of the month, and promptly grounded me. I’m not pregnant, I just skip periods sometimes. FML
Today, as I was getting my mail, I noticed I'd received a free coupon from a baby supply store, saying, "Congratulations on your pregnancy!" Thinking it was a mistake, I showed my girlfriend, who I live with. All she had to say was, "Surprise!" FML
Today, my mom threw my tampons in the garbage and said that from now on, I'll be buying pads instead. Turns out she read a scare story going around by email that all the local teens are soaking their tampons in alcohol and inserting them anally to secretly get drunk. FML
Today, my mom told my dad to get me extra absorbent pads, very loudly, in a crowded mall. FML
Today, as he was going out, I asked my father if he stop by the store and buy some tampons for me and toilet paper for the house, because we have been out for the last 5 days. He came home with a 30-pack of beer and cigarettes instead. I just started my time of the month and we have no more money. FML
Today, I asked my dad to take me to the store so I could get some feminine hygiene products. When we got there, he went running down the aisles yelling, "Help! My daughter's bleeding to death! Where're the tampons?!" FML
Today, I decided I was gonna take a pregnancy test after being two months late. I bought two because I was sure it would give me a positive. That same night I got my period. FML
Today, I took a pregnancy test. When I saw that the result was positive, I started crying and showed my mom. She burst out laughing and told me that I had taken an ovulation test. FML
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Top comments
saywhaaat_01 0
hahaha awesome mom
mritty 2
How is this a problem? You *are* going to use one or the other this month, aren't you? (I mean, unless you're a guy). Were you under the impression your mother doesn't know you have a menstrual cycle? Or do you think that your mom shouldn't be referring to your cycle, because that's something very intimate and private.... and should only be talked about on the Internet with a bunch of strangers?
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Comments (114)
avenged7fold6661 0
most of the ppl I know do use one or the other each month
stephoria 2
At least she's being equally biased in her opinion of you.
suppressed08 2
^ which also means she wasn't biased
stephoria 2
Thanks for clarifying the obvious there.
xWTF_FML_FTWx 1
yes. you are.
LoganBballin16 0
I'm going to comment on every fml!
Mehness 0
How is this an fml? She's got the right idea there.
cantfightfate 0
this is not an fml. your mom is funny, and you WILL be using one of those this month, take the coupons, save the money.
sukaaa 0
wtf you got coupons and ur saying fml?? what?!? theres kids in africa that havnt even heard of tampons
raw_tigahh 2
ohh here comes the "kids in Africa" speeches. damn
avenged7fold6661 0
as in thinking they're prego every month...but at least your moms helping you out op just take the coupons
EdwardN 0
haha #47
cantfightfate 0
a7x rocks!! I just saw them in concert on september 4th. :)
Currentlyonfire 4
she should of handed you a third for coathangets. just in case.
breakingakajav 0
pretty much, I don't see why she got agitated over it. Not a FML nor a YDI
coolsteve 0
if you have to take a pregnancy test and you're not in a relationship, you're a ****
TheIrishJaneDoe 9
1 doesn't know many guys, apparently.
Flinlock 0
Seriously... where's the FML? You got free coupons and a mom with a sense of humor. Too bad you don't have one...
hannah1203 2
Lol your mom is awesome, how is this an FML?? I find this a pure win.
fadingaway 17
42, stop being a dickwad. I live in South Africa. Believe it or not, we are just as civilized as the US/UK. OP, how is this an FML? You've got coupons, and a mom with a sense of humour. It's obvious that you're going to use one of the two, so I don't see the problem.
ernodea 0
yes the abundance of racism and pre
MnBran6 0
Apparently OP doesn't use tampons or pregnancy tests... I wonder if she knows she's a girl.
saywhaaat_01 0
hahaha awesome mom
unfortunate_13 5
^indeed. OP, FYL for having no sense of humor
Peacemaker9 7
agreed with both of them
M16a2 0
tanning ages you...
dacman48 0
nice ****
rob780202 0
damn #2 lookin good :)
SpaceMannn 0
your mom knows what's up!.. I think she is calling you a ****.. and a moody bitch. I'm just saying:P
jamiebuczko 0
this is veracious.
divastar139 0
hahaha funny. Probably true too!!
vtsocks 2
unless your Amish, being on birth control doesn't make anyone a ****
amerwin 3
Seem like a fair statement.. accept the coupons with gratitude and save 79 cents on your next purchase!
EmmyGrangerDC 0
exactly!
ANTLink19 4
WIN!!! Thoughtful, smart, financially responsible. Good job mom!
bartholemew4life 0
especially in this economy.
ThePwnapple 0
I fail to see what's wrong.
brennboo 3
I don't get it... can someone explain please?
PurpleMonkeysFor 0
I think ops mom is saying she's fat enough to be pregnant . and she's either just fat (needs tampons) or pregnant (needs tester)
pikantna777 0
since when does using tampons have any association with being fat?
darkmis1 18
It doesn't. He means that the OP could've gained weight, and it could be that she's pregnant (needs a test), or that she just gained weight, and is going to get her period as usual (needs tampons).
cooldukenukem 2
has nothing to do with weight. the mom is just implying that the daughter might be having sex and therefor will need a pregnancy test. and if she's not pregnant she will need tampons
Frenchtony 17
almost first *hoising French flag*
Peacemaker9 7
well ur not. hoisting American flag long live America long live America. that's if the first person is american anyway
randomnameflob 0
French flag is white? no wait, youre just surrendering, nvm.
blloyd19 0
Parenting fail
lotuspod 0
how is this a parenting fail OP could be of age and even if she under 18 kids will do what they want regardless how well you are as a parent
ktbird 0
How is giving your kid a coupon a parenting fail?
MissErikaHart 0
pick up sum condoms when u go to the store too
mritty 2
How is this a problem? You *are* going to use one or the other this month, aren't you? (I mean, unless you're a guy). Were you under the impression your mother doesn't know you have a menstrual cycle? Or do you think that your mom shouldn't be referring to your cycle, because that's something very intimate and private.... and should only be talked about on the Internet with a bunch of strangers?
dezzyfknbanana 0
agreed ^
MissErikaHart 0
maybe she on birth control and really wont need either
ktbird 0
Agreed with 15. And most people on birth control still have periods.