Today, I noticed a strange lady following me around in the mall. After a while I began to get creeped out, so I confronted her. Apparently she has to make sure everything she buys is better than what I buy. After a long silence she said, "What? You never noticed me before?" FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was shopping in the mall. A cute store worker kept checking me out, so after I picked a few things I went up to her and started flirting. After a few seconds, she cut me off and said, "Actually I was watching you because you look like someone who would shoplift." FML
Today, I was in the gas station and I saw this creepy lady staring at me and smiling. She just didn't stop. I even gave an awkward wave to let her know that I saw her staring at me. Finally I decided to confront the woman, turns out the overly happy woman was a cardboard cut out FML
Today, I went to the mall. While shopping in a store, a woman bumped into me numerous times. Getting annoyed, I turned to her and loudly exclaimed, "Are you blind?!" Turns out she was. FML
Today, I was shopping with a friend. We snuck into the same fitting room so we could give our opinions on each other's clothes. The suspicious saleswoman knocked on the door and asked how many people were in our room. I quickly answered, "It's OK. She's just watching." FML
Today, while in Walmart, I noticed an old man who had been following me for about five minutes. I politely pulled over with my cart and smiled at him so he could pass. He then said with a creepy smile, "So, it's your turn to stare at my butt now?" It's the most attention I've gotten in weeks. FML
Today, I went to a grocery store after work, exhausted. I nodded politely at a woman who smiled at me repeatedly. I realized at checkout she thought I was someone she knew. I nodded through a full conversation without knowing who I was pretending to be. FML
Today, in a crowded store, I waved at someone who looked familiar. The woman frowned, looked behind her, then back at me, and said, “Do I know you?” I panicked and said, “Yes… spiritually?” She walked away faster than I’ve ever seen flee. FML
Today, while I was out shopping, a fairly hideous-looking woman stormed up to me and accused me of ogling her, saying, "As if I'd ever date you!" Less than a minute later, she'd somehow managed to bully me into falsely admitting to it and apologizing. FML
Today, I was standing in a queue when an old lady turned, looked straight at me, and asked me to hold her bag. Confused, I took a hold of it. She started screaming for help claiming I was stealing her shopping. Turns out, she was talking to her husband behind me. FML
Today, I went to the mall. A little girl was walking around and telling everyone that they were pretty. When she got to me, she gave me a disgusted look and walked away. FML
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Top comments
poopy910 8
That is terrifying.
br0ccoli 15
Creep. It's Taser time. Tell her to get off your nuts.
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Comments (132)
ladiesman219 4
buy something that can't be beat!!
Dracoboxer357 36
10- I'm going to suggest one possible answer to your first question, but it's more opinion than fact, I believe: It appears to me that some people feel the need to "be better" than others as a way of dealing with their own feelings of worthlessness. They feel lesser than someone for whatever reason, so they seek a way to "one up" that person, or someone else to represent them in their mind. It's like the people that look to gain respect from others, without even respecting themselves. Kind of sad. :p IMHO, if this person felt secure with who they are, they wouldn't care to make sure they "beat you" on this pathetic, little measuring scale. Don't compare yourself to others, you'll always find someone "better" than you in something. Instead, look to better yourself, for the sake of "being better", than who or what you were. ;) (Not too corny, I hope?) ;P
br0ccoli 15
41- you're like a life guru. You hit it right on the money (in my opinion) when you said people should spend time bettering themselves instead of trying to one-up others to feel more significant. Totally agree. Why compare? Some people are running a totally different race.
ahabsfan 17
I'd like to apologize for my wife's behaviour. Next time you confront her please send her home right away. I can't afford to keep up anymore.
kateRAWR 4
#26--but i thumbed up . :) lol :D
heyred 11
Time to start Internet shopping.
wildsweetchild 19
Some people these days truly amaze me ..sad for the stalker lady. She's either mentally not well, or has no self confidence at all.
NegaMe 12
So that's why mom buys all this weird stuff...
Pandacupcakelove 26
:/ call the police
DaKillaMafia 2
You live in Texas. Buy something in a way that she can't see the product. Go home, and she'll follow you to see what it was and get a better one. Once she is on your property, she's yours.
AloysiusWeasley 15
...I love this reply so much. It solves all the problems in such a nice, neat, and satisfying way.