Today, while I was out shopping, a fairly hideous-looking woman stormed up to me and accused me of ogling her, saying, "As if I'd ever date you!" Less than a minute later, she'd somehow managed to bully me into falsely admitting to it and apologizing. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, I was shopping in the mall. A cute store worker kept checking me out, so after I picked a few things I went up to her and started flirting. After a few seconds, she cut me off and said, "Actually I was watching you because you look like someone who would shoplift." FML
Today, I went to the mall. While shopping in a store, a woman bumped into me numerous times. Getting annoyed, I turned to her and loudly exclaimed, "Are you blind?!" Turns out she was. FML
Today, I saw an elderly woman struggling to reach the top shelf in my local grocery store, so I went over and asked if she needed help. She then accused me of flirting with her and had me escorted from the property. FML
Pranks for all ages
Today, I was grocery shopping, when an elderly lady walked up to me and tripped over her own feet. I caught her by the arm, at which point she shrieked at me for "groping" her. She ended up smirking as security threw me out of the store. FML
Today, at the supermarket, a guy started yelling at me for staring at his "woman." She frankly looked like someone had carved Mick Jagger's face into a turd. When I told him I have better things to do than ogle random women, he started harassing me for being "a queer." FML
Keep walking
Today, I was out when a guy walking with his girlfriend eyed me up. I made a shocked face at him and kept walking. The next thing I knew, his girlfriend was beating the shit out of me claiming that I was "the other woman." I'd never seen the guy before in my life. FML
Pissed to meet you
Today, at Walmart, a lady came up to me and informed me that I "look like the kinda skank that'd give it up on the first date". FML
Today, while waiting for my order at a restaurant, a woman walked up to me and slapped me. She looked at me for a moment and said "Sorry, I thought you were someone else." Ten minutes later, the same woman came back and slapped me again. FML
Today, while in line at the supermarket, I told the lady behind me that she had a cute baby. She shot me a disgusted look and straight up accused me of being a pedophile. FML
Holy stereotypes, mom!
Today, at a mall, my mom accused me of lying about being gay, just because I said I don't like shopping. FML
Top comments
trippymane 6
YDI. Stand up for yourself. Don't let yourself be bullied.
yoimtrollin 24
Bullied by an ugly lady? Come on bro.
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Comments (62)
AngrySailor 17
I call BS... It's hard to "storm up" when riding one of those Walmart scooters.
trippymane 6
YDI. Stand up for yourself. Don't let yourself be bullied.
tjv3 10
Way to stand up for yourself
EnigmaThe321 12
#77 Why are you asking #2 this?
yoimtrollin 24
Bullied by an ugly lady? Come on bro.
izzie321 27
She shouldn't try so hard to flatter herself... I hate people like that, ugly or not.
world_on_fire 4
should've said 'same to you, have you even seen yourself?' hehe
etchsanity1 11
Then tell her your little brother loves the movie Shrek and ask for an autograph.
Girreth 7
Or, seeing as how you clearly aren't confident enough to fire back insults, you could just say "I'm gay." What's she gonna do? Call you a liar?
Ambient25 25
You should have falsely admitted to it and apologized the first second she came up! Otherwise people would see that "fairly hideous" woman arguing about you looking, and cast the stink-eye at you.
ttr125 10
Ahhhh..... walmart gotta love the crazy
JFloUnknown 24
Walmartians man.
spaboolly 26
Wow. I can only imagine how much of a pushover you are for pretty girls.
TheSofaKing 7
Should have told her that you would rather screw sheep.
CallMeMcFeelii 14
Baaaaaaad choice of words. Sheeprobably think you were into that stuff.
ilovedinosawers 17
He's too sheepish to stand up to her.
elephantsarecute 16
In situations like that it's best to just get out ASAP. I usually just pretend I don't speak English and walk away. (Not that this happens to me frequently)
JFloUnknown 24
Stop oggling me you ugly freak!
LadyRodgers29 0
Agreed. If you hadn't just apologized and walked away, she may have just flipped sh&t on you and things could have gotten exponentially worse.
Sa7z 6
Seems like ugliness is not just in her face.