Today, I was Whatsapping my boyfriend, as I am away for work. Before talking to him, I texted my work group I wasn’t feeling well after they invited me out. As I was chatting with what I thought was my boyfriend, I said, “I want your penis inside me.” And then realized I'd texted my work group. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was sexting my boss. I realised that I wasn't texting my boyfriend after I'd sent 2 nudes, and received many sexually provocative responses. FML
Today, I texted my husband saying, “No sex tonight, it’s a bloodbath” and realized it was in a group chat with his parents, not directly to him like I'd intended. FML
Today, I emailed my boyfriend from work. Out of habit, I absent-mindedly entered my department into the "From" field. My boyfriend didn't notice when he replied. Now my entire department knows I want to "drop to my knees and suck him when I get home." And he plans to "finish on my face." FML
Today, I was sending my boyfriend dirty texts to try and turn him on so when I see him the next day he will want to get intimate. Twenty minutes later he texts back, "ew stop." FML
Today, I was sexting my girlfriend when I accidentally sent one to my swim team’s group chat. This means that 19 men got a picture of me flexing with everything on display. Worst part? I got more compliments from them than I ever got from my girlfriend. FML
Today, I sent a text message to my girlfriend telling her how much I wanted to make love to her tonight. I've just realized I sent it to her brother. FML
Today, I got a text message while driving home. I checked after arriving, and found it was a kinky text from my boyfriend, so I sent him an even kinkier reply. He later raged at me, because I somehow should have known he was showing off his phone to his mom when I sent my reply. FML
Today, to get my mind off being single, I texted some friends. The first one was going out tonight to work things out with her ex, the second told me about his amazing new girlfriend, and the third replied an hour later with, "Sorry, I was having sex when you texted me." FML
Today, I started to type up a mass text to tell a decent amount of my friends that I'd just come home to a surprise from my boyfriend. Trying to fix a typo, I accidentally hit send with the text only saying "Guess what?! I just came." FML
Today, I had an argument with my boss and tried to text a friend about it. I accidentally texted my boss instead. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
dasin 18
maybe im to old but how do you text and get the person wrong if your video chatting?
Zekfen 17
You could just play it off as being into orgies and it’s a team building thing.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (21)
Zekfen 17
You could just play it off as being into orgies and it’s a team building thing.
RichardPencil 32
Now you should be able to get several penises in you. Penes? Penii?
manb91uk 22
Penises... An encyclopedia on all things phallic like you should already know that (-.-)
RichardPencil 32
Well, regardless she can get plural of them rather than the singular.
Suzi_d16 27
Penises isn’t technically correct. Penes or penii is correct.
RichardPencil 32
Penii is not correct. Penis is a 3rd declension noun in Latin meaning “tail,” so the plural is penes.
manb91uk 22
Never has this sentence been more appropriate but... I prefer penises
RichardPencil 32
I’m a boob guy😂😂😂
aelabed 17
Nice
dasin 18
maybe im to old but how do you text and get the person wrong if your video chatting?
steph_828547328 3
It was a text not video chat
kdawgone 9
So you want people to feel sorry for you because you can't tell the difference between a group chat and an individual chat with your boyfriend? This is a not an accident this is you not caring to pay attention. You can't be feeling so bad you can't spend time with co-workers if you feel the need to get some pipe laid in you.
evilplatypus 39
Not only can they not tell the difference between group chat and individual chat, they cant tell the difference between video and text!
turnabouttrial 21
if she's posting it on FML, a humor site, I'm pretty sure she's open to you laughing at her, not just feeling sorry for her
ojosRojos 28
Why would you text your boyfriend while you’re video chatting with him? This makes no sense.
Sonotsuave 37
To this day I’m really not sure how people do this. I’ve never mistakenly texted a current / former boss or coworker or relative something inappropriate by mistake, and I’ve accumulated contacts from a million jobs, internships, volunteering positions and other academic or formal events. And i usually message multiple people at once. And I make all kinds of inappropriate jokes and shit that the professional people in my life don’t know about lol. It’s not that hard to pay attention
Rosaluv 5
Just explain that you already had plans and you didn't want to go out! If they want to hang, they can always come watch!😂🙊#Stay... awkward