Today, I went for coffee with some people from work. I lined up to order behind a guy I'd only met a few times. When he paid, he dropped his wallet, and I saw that he had a picture of me cut from the company newsletter, enlarged, and taped inside his wallet. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I bumped into a man on the street. I apologized and he picked up his wallet. To clear the awkward silence, I pointed out that his wallet looked like mine. It wasn't until I was on the next street that I realized it was my wallet. FML
Today, at work one of my co-worker was oddly nice to me; and my boss, who usually always says hi to me, didn't look or speak to me. Later that day I found out that I was going to be fired, not because my boss told me but because my picture was missing from the wall of employees. FML
Today, while getting out of Starbucks there was a homeless guy. I bought him a coffee and he was so happy he gave me a hug. Guess whose wallet is missing? FML
Today, I saw an elderly man struggling to make it across a busy street. I jumped up from my table at Starbucks to help him, leaving my things behind. When I got back to my table feeling good, I found that my coffee had disappeared. So had my wallet. FML
Today, I found out my boss and some employees on my floor have bets placed on who can get the best picture of my ass. I found out when one of the pictures was accidentally sent to me. FML
Today, I went to pick up some pictures I took on a family trip, but the person at the counter said someone else had already picked them up. Now not only am I out $20, some random creep has pictures of me and my whole family. FML
Today, I went and bought lunch for all the people I work with. The only meal the place forgot was mine. FML
Today, I saw a shady looking person on the street. As I walked past him, he said, "Hey, come here." Thinking he needed something, I went over. He handed me several pictures of my wife, in public and at home. I've never seen this man before in my life. FML
Today, at work, I was looking for my lost wallet. After hours of looking I gave up and went home. The wallet then showed up in my mail box with an envelope marked "To the asshole." I opened the letter and it was filled with poop. My wallet too. FML
Today, I went to the store and ran into an old friend that I hadn't seen in years. We chatted a little, and just as I was leaving he grabbed his mobile phone. Later, I added him on Facebook. Turns out the last thing he posted was a picture of my back saying: "Look who got even fatter." FML
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Top comments
Peroxide 3
I like the fact he took the effort to enlarge the pic, but im disappointed he didn't photoshop himself into it with a couple of kids.
SaintJimmy 0
Oh wow. That's really creepy. I think you should probably talk to whatever part of your company deals with obsessive creepers.
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Comments (124)
HarrisonVR 17
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Haha, failed. Beat him up.
alexandraa_fml 0
He might have a shrine dedicated to you in his closet like that kid on Hey Arnold! D:
hoschiadedodi 0
Why beat up? She should have the courage to just take it as a compliment.
reyemrein 0
Maybe it was Tiger Woods in disguise and you're gonna be ho #16.
alexomAnexo 0
the dod you're hot
iwuvwolfz 0
If you wanna hit on someone, go like his: The dod, you're hawt, would you like to suck on my cawk?
Xellith 5
psssyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyccoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
Spongii101 12
You missed a 'h'.
akg98 13
^^^^^ *an
J352SAURUS 30
'A' is okay. Depends on how you say "h". I say "haych" so 'a' is okay. If you say "aych" then use 'an'.
SaintJimmy 0
Oh wow. That's really creepy. I think you should probably talk to whatever part of your company deals with obsessive creepers.
ilovefatcats 12
lol #3
harshallmeim69 9
You mean the police? Damn.
herbertx 0
you should keep the wallet and max out all his cards
LilKonvicted 0
Creepy stalker much?
spovich_fml 0
lol
aliciamartinez15 11
If u ever need a date to the office Christmas party...
delude 26
Lol hasn't he heard? Never mix business with stalking
BB7 0
That's cute... you've got yourself a personal stalker :)
Sun_Kissed18 25
Yes because I find all of my stalkers adorable! I have a cutesy nickname for each one. Oh look! Here comes Twitchy, he's my favorite ;)
GreenHacker 0
Hey, it's Knifey! Hi Knifey, can you walk me through this dark alley?
Knifey 0
you call?
stolencookie 17
Lmao 62. That made my day.
Peroxide 3
I like the fact he took the effort to enlarge the pic, but im disappointed he didn't photoshop himself into it with a couple of kids.
Rayn4u_fml 0
Either you have an amazing sense of humour, or you have done this before lol! Anyway, she should be happy, she has a new fan ^^
fireandice27 0
I'm sure he has already. Unfortunately, a family picture of such photoshopped complexity requires more space than a wallet to do it justice. It's probably hanging on his living room wall.
Rayn4u_fml 0
Talking from experience as well then I take it!
Peroxide 3
Yes my future wife and I have 2 kids. We go on all sorts of holidays together. The strange thing is she's wearing the same clothes in all of the photos and has the exact same expression on her face. We're one big happy family. I'll tell her about it some day...
Rayn4u_fml 0
I really enjoy love stories with happy endings. Don't you let her get away!
keenaz 0
lol at #7, maybe he just hasn't gotten around to it yet.
baby_gurl2405 0
haha wow. that rly sux. i say go enlarge a diferent employes pic and show THAT too him ;)
Val0 17
Go back to school
fireandice27 0
Flattering, yes, but incredibly creepy.
BeeSkwaird 0
I'd certainly never do it, but evidently the sight of you inspires him. I say don't take it personally.