Today, I got a kitten. She decided to sleep on my bed, waking me up periodically during the night by biting my face to make sure I was still alive. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I woke up at 3 a.m. to my cat biting my face. This isn’t the first time this has happened. I’m pretty sure if I die in my sleep, she’ll eat me. FML
Today, I noticed my kitten was growling and twitching in his sleep. I tried to wake him up by gently prodding him. He responded by waking up and attacking my face. FML
Today, I was laying with my face dangling down the side of my bed, when my kitten rushed up to me looking worried. He sniffed me for a while, then decided the best thing to do was to stand on his hind legs and start punching my face like a speed bag. FML
Today, my cat likes to share my pillow at night. I guess she was extra comfortable last night, because she didn't bother getting off it to hack up a hairball. I woke up because I rolled my face onto it. FML
Today, I didn't realize my cat was sleeping in the room with me until she decided to jump on me in the middle of the night, resulting in a critical hit to my groin. FML
Today, my cat tried to kill me. While I was sleeping, he put his paws on either side of my face and laid down, covering my nose and mouth. While I was struggling to free myself, I could hear my sister laughing next to me. FML
Today, I was snuggling with my neighbors four week old kitten while babysitting their kids. I fell asleep, rolled over, and woke up next to a dead kitten. FML
Today, my cat woke me up by sharpening his claws on my breast. FML
Today, in the very middle of the night, my kitten started rubbing against my face. Thinking I saw her face in the darkness, I decided to kiss her before going back to bed. My lips made contact with her butthole. FML
Today, I was woken up by my roommates cat meowing so loudly at her door, wanting in. Suddenly it stopped. I was just falling back into sleep when I rolled over and the cat was right there beside my head. Meowing. FML
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Top comments
Welshite 40
It wasn't to ensure you were alive. She was testing to see if you were dead. I've heard freshly deceased human is a kitten's favorite meal.
FlamingColor 30
Awww it's just showing that it loves you! And on the bright side it's a kitten so that means little painless bites, I'd hope xD
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Comments (62)
Catdragon 40
Kittens tend to be extremely playful, but I am sure you already know that. Kittens also don't know how hard to bite unless they learn it from their siblings. Your kitten will calm down around 1-2 years of age, but will remain kittenlike until then. The bites may hurt, but it's to be expected. Just make sure none of the bites draw blood, as you can get blood poisoning or whatever else.
Sora_McKain 36
Actually, you can get blood poisoning if the cat bites hard enough but doesn't draw blood. If the bite punctures the skin then it need to bleed, that's how the body gets rid of the infection.
dontknow1 19
I will take that as a cute and lovely gesture, just next time close the door so he can't get into your bedroom.
HylianBadger 21
I know how you feel. I'm currently going through the same thing with my kitten. He bit me on the ear last week, and clawed me in the back just today. But from personal experience, the fiestiest kittens grow up to have the friendliest, most lovable personalities. But that may vary, as no two kittens are exactly alike.
Migole 36
Kittens should not be gotten alone but always in pairs. If you disregarded on of the most basic rules of cat ownership, then I can only say YDI, sorry. Of course it's bored, it's a ******* kitten!
HylianBadger 21
I have a puppy to keep my kitten company at night. They're best friends and play almost constantly. But that doesn't stop my kitten from harassing me from time to time when I'm sleeping. OP probably moved in her sleep and kitty thought she was awake, so she wanted to play. Don't be too quick to judge.
GhostFox 34
Not all kittens do well in multiple-cat homes. You really can't just slap a blanket statement on animals like that- there are outliers in every population. In fact, kittens should do fine in single cat homes as long as they were old enough when they were separated from their family. By around 10-12 weeks of age, most kittens have learned the 'rules of playtime etiquette' that are why people suggest adopting two kittens. Even if you do adopt a kitten younger than that, you can teach them those rules yourself. It takes a little extra time spent with them early on, but it circumvents the issues caused by them not learning the behaviors- and means you don't have to worry about being overwhelmed by the responsibility of introducing two kittens to your household.
an_awkward_day 11
That's amazing. I can't believe you don't like it
Pepsiisbae 15
Its so sweet!?
heheitscece 16
Our new kitten does the exact same thing, except she's usually very playful. She'll wake me up by biting on my chin lately, then all of a sudden she'll pounce on my hand and attack it. When she's tired, shell sleep on my neck.
tygerarmy 35
The kitten is clearly trying to eat you in your sleep. Or not. It's probably playing. Cats are nocturnal, so until you get the kitty on your schedule seriously play with the kitten before you go to bed to try to tire the kitty out.
ElNeto 14
Lucky OP, The only time my cat wants me is for feeding time
leafynitemare 24
Everyone knows if you die in your house your cat(s) will eat you