Today, for the first time ever, while I was driving I ran over a squirrel. It was in front of three little girls at their lemonade stand. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, while driving my new car, a squirrel ran in front of me so I slammed on my brakes. The person behind me didn't notice and rear-ended me. The squirrel got hit by a car going the opposite direction. FML
Today, I ran over a squirrel. I saw it twitching, so I backed over it to end its suffering. It wasn't a squirrel; it was a kitten. The children it belonged to watched as I ran over their kitten. Twice. FML
Today, I accidentally ran over a squirrel on the road. I was late for work so I didn't stop. Later, someone keyed the word PETA into the side of my car. FML
Today, I swerved out of the way to avoid hitting a squirrel, and in the process hit another squirrel. FML
Today, I was on a drive with my uncle. We saw a dead deer on the side of the road and expressed our pity for it. Then a squirrel runs across the road and my uncle swerves toward the squirrel, laughing hysterically and yelling, "Run rodent run." FML
Today, I found a baby squirrel on the pavement and thought I'd try and rescue it. While I googled what to do, it started running around. I tried to grab it, but it ran straight into the path of a car. FML
Today, while going for a walk, I saw two bunnies next to the road. Apparently, I was scarier than the oncoming traffic, because one of them decided to sprint into the road as I walked by. I could hear its bones crunch as it got hit by a car. FML
Today, I ran to my car and zoomed to work to avoid being late. I was in such a hurry, I forgot to close all my windows. When I got back to my car, I found a dead squirrel inside. FML
Today, while driving home I saw a few deer running beside me. I stopped to let them go in front. Instead, one face-plants, ramming into the side of my new car. FML
Today, a spider dangled an inch away from my face while I was driving. I freaked out and accidentally bumped the car in front of me. Three cops arrived on the scene and I had to explain to them what happened. I can still hear them laughing. FML
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Top comments
8trickster8 0
Yeah, I hate kids too
mojomojo_fml 5
Coulda been worse. You could've run over a girl in front of three squirrels
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Comments (98)
DameGreyWulf 1
Hah! I passed this guy and suddenly SHIT THERE'S A SQUIRREL I missed, dunno about the guy I passed though. Fthatsquirrel'sL Poor girls.
jordypordy227 0
at least it wasn't a kitten. now that would have been traumatizing.
Nissi 17
The less squirrels in the world, the better.
DeadHead86 0
I am sorry, but I laughed hysterically at this. I mean, the little girls are probably traumatized, but nonetheless it is hilarious. Maybe the little girls laughed?
Yawn823 0
on the bright side the squirrel's guts didnt go flying into the lemonade =)
cmac86 24
that's awesome!
DameGreyWulf 1
I told my father this FML, and he told me a story: Some time ago, he was walking with a girl he was dating and her little nieces. A semi passed by, and a small cat darted out. Yes, it hit the cat, but that's not what's bad... It stuck to the wheels, and flew off just in front of them.
kingsteveooo 4
LMFAOOOOOOOO ew
dangstuhh 0
I agree with
jalopotan 8
if you were in a video game youd get 500 points :P
dan13mey 0
Who still makes lemonade stands anymore..