Today, while working at the daycare, I had to clean the entire place. During the next four hours, I scooped up three human teeth, a rotten log of shit, a tire iron, a condom wrapper, and a yogurt that expired in 2003. I only cleaned the place a week ago. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, one of the kids at the daycare center I work at was so excited at the fact that his constipation was over, he felt the need to bring me his fecal matter, in his hands, to show me. Guess who had to clean up the aftermath. FML
Today, I had to clean up human poop that someone trailed through the store. Then, as I was cleaning up all the shelves at the end of the day, I saw that someone had changed their sanitary pad, took a new one out of the packed and used it, then left the used one on the shelf. FML
Today, I got home from a long day of work and saw a pile of dog puke on the kitchen floor. I went to get paper towels and found a pile of dog shit. With my foot. Both of my kids were home all day and left the piles for me to clean because "that's gross". FML
Today, I had to clean human excrement at work when the fitting room turned into the shitting room. FML
Today, at work, I came back from my break to find a child covered in mud. Turns out it wasn't mud. One of the other children had taken all of the poop out of their diaper and smeared it all over the floor, walls, and other children. The other teacher hadn't noticed, and I had to clean it all up. FML
Today, at work in a library, I found a dirty diaper stuffed under one of the public use computer desks. Not only was it leaking, but it had been run over several times by a rolling office chair. I had to clean it up. FML
Today, I started my new job as a janitor at a store. The first thing that happened when I came in was another employee telling me that there was vomit in the restroom, and that I had to clean it up. Not only did I clean up vomit, I had to clean up the poop that made the kid puke in the first place. FML
Today, while working at a fast food restaurant, I stayed a little overtime to help my manager with dishes. A kid pooped in the slide in the playground area attached to the restaurant itself. I'm the smallest one there. I had to crawl UP the slide to find and clean the poop. FML
Today, I work in a grocery store and a woman suffering from diarrhea somehow managed to get shit up and down two of the store aisles, then go to the ladies room and mess up the stall. I was the only one working trained in deal with bio-hazardous waste so I had to clean it up. FML
Today, I went into the tanning room at work, where the lady in there last had decided the trash can was a toilet and pooped in it. Before she sat, she took the time to wrap the edges in paper towels, I guess in case anyone else had done this before her. I had to clean it up. FML
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Top comments
FMLpuppy 3
And this is a daycare for children?
trellz17 19
A used condom wrapper? What the hell are those kids doing!
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Comments (210)
roxyelizabeth 3
Um you only clean once a week??? Thats kinda disgusting!
anderlende 9
What ******* daycare do you work at? 3 year olds don't have sex? And yogurt from 03? Jesus
Quadroblitz 10
What is this the daycare from Pokemon?
kissychick 19
Wait hold the phone a comdon rapper in a daycare? Um what kind of daycare do u work at?
sammyjo06 14
The teeth and the shit are going to be the norm when you're dealing with children. But expired yogurt is unacceptable to have around kids who will eat anything, and the condom wrapper is just disturbing. At least you didn't find a used condom, lol.
MSDemonslayer 5
They start out young and grow up so fast.
themetalstickman 19
Holy shit, an 9-year-old yogurt? That's ******* disgusting.
Starham1 14
I need to hear the story behind the tire iron.
Weirdbirthmark 3
Is it weird that I read that I read this FML to the tune of "The 12 day of Xmas"? Three human teeth, A rot-ten turd. A tire-iron, A condom wrapper, AND A YOGURT FROM 2003!
OptimusSlime 23
Did you at least check the yogurt to see if it was expired yet? *sarcasm*