Today, while on my run, I saw a middle-aged man sleeping near a business condo. I approached him and asked if he was "ok." He grabbed my leg, held onto it with a death-grip, and moped about how horrible his life was - for ten minutes. At least the weather was nice. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
You OK dude?
Today, while working as a hotel guard, I found a homeless man lying in the grass. I asked him to move and he ignored me, continuing to lie there with his head resting on his arms and a big smile on his face. I got annoyed and started to yell at him. After a few minutes, I realized he was dead. FML
Today, while I was walking home from work, it started to rain. Clutching my bag in one hand, I started to run so I wouldn't get too wet. I saw a man running towards me and all of a sudden he tackled me to the ground. He thought I had stolen someone's handbag. FML
Not loving it
Today, as I exited McDonald's after a quick lunch, a man in a jogging outfit ran past, snatching my handbag right off my shoulder as he tore past. He must have been at least 50. I broke down utterly exhausted before I could chase him even a single block. I'm 24. FML
Weirdo alert
Today, while running, a man ran up next to me and started jogging with me. He asked if he could run with me and I said yes. Later, when I told him I was going home, he followed me home. When I asked him to leave, he sat down on my lawn in protest. He has been there for over 4 hours. FML
Today, as I was jogging on the boardwalk, an old guy tripped me with his cane. As I was getting back up, I heard him say to his wife, "I wanted to see if she would actually fall." FML
Today, I saw a man lying face down in a field and thinking he was injured, I ran over to help. As soon as I got to him, I realized he was completely naked. He stood up and chased after me. FML
Asshole
Today, I was walking by the side of the interstate because my car broke down. A nice young man stopped and asked if I was tired of walking. I said yes, to which he replied, "Try jogging asshole" then laughed and drove off. It was raining balls. FML
Today, I was brutally run over by a man in a wheelchair. FML
Today, I was at the park when I saw a homeless man sleeping on a bench. I thought it would be funny to throw a small rock at him. He thought it would be funny to pull out his knife and chase me for six blocks. FML
What is this neighborhood?
Today, I was out jogging, when I saw a girl fall off her bike and start crying. I ran over to see if she was hurt. Apparently her neighbour thought I was trying to kidnap her, because he ran out with a baseball bat and threatened to beat me to death if I didn't get lost. FML
Top comments
gogo_speedracer 0
Awww! It was nice of you to listen for 10 minutes!
omega802 0
awwww he likes u
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Comments (128)
mobchick16 0
there is always a bright side
mycomment 0
this isn't a FML, op you should be feeling bad for the homeless man
xxtheman15xx 0
Break his fkin hand..
kisseshugsdrugs 5
you live in california, 1: the weathers always nice. 2: why taunt the homeless?
JokeMeister 0
It didn't COST you a dime. You should feel honored he thought you good enough to share his deepest woes. Think of others before yourself.
myworld99 0
that's not an fml. you asked a downtrodden man how he was and he simply needed to let it out. stop being a stupid bitch.
joehmak 0
all he needs is a listener
Abby_normal85 0
Wow...so yeah, you're an ass.... Don't ask if you don't really care. God forbid you waste ten minutes of your life listening to a miserable man with nothing going for him. Good thing his life isn't half as hard as yours...oh wait...it is! Go drink bleach
myguineapiglucy 0
ya shoulda farted in his ugly face
Terces 0
Oh geez this is your own fault you chose to ask him and he gave you an awnser hes the one sleeping outside you retard You think you have problems? Oh a guy told you his problems for ten minutes while grabbing on your leg Not a big deal YDI Didnt he tell you how horrible his life was for ten minutes? Be lucky your not him, you should've listened instead of complained you YDDouche.