Today, I was walking by the side of the interstate because my car broke down. A nice young man stopped and asked if I was tired of walking. I said yes, to which he replied, "Try jogging asshole" then laughed and drove off. It was raining balls. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my car broke down. I had a two mile, up-hill walk ahead of me. About half way up the hill, a car beeped. Thinking they were poking fun at my misfortune, I began to curse and use obscene gestures, only to find out that it was my neighbor asking if I needed a ride. She drove off. FML
Today, as I was walking home from work, my dad drove past, pulled over, rolled down the window and asked, "Are you tired of walking?" To which I replied "Yes!" Just as I reached for the car door, he yelled "RUN A WHILE" and sped off. FML
Today, I was walking down the street and spotted a man who was about 6 and a half feet tall passing by me. As he passed me, I turned and asked him "How's the weather up there?" He then turned around, spat on me, and replied "Raining." FML
Today, I was walking in the freezing rain when a guy asked me if I wanted to share his umbrella with him. I grinned and told him I did. He then noticed a pretty girl walking behind me and he abruptly turned to her and asked her the same question. FML
Today, my car broke down at a red light. A man pulled up next to me and yelled at me to get out of the fast lane. I thought he was gonna offer help, as I was a young woman on her own, but he just yelled at me and sped off. FML
Today, as I was walking home, a car drove through a puddle and splashed me like in a cheesy movie. As if that wasn't annoying enough, the driver had to pull over because she was laughing too hard. FML
Today, walking to work in a snowstorm since I don't own a car, a man rolled down his window and screamed, "what are you doing you f***ing freak? you stupid b**ch!", while I waited for a green light to cross. FML
Today, I was walking home from the gym. An old man in his car rolled down the window and drove slowly next to me. He pulled out a camera, took a picture of me and said, "It's gonna be a fun night!" and then drove off. FML
Today, my tire blew while I was on the freeway. I had to change the tire in pouring rain while wearing short shorts and flip-flops. No one stopped to help, but several people politely honked as if to remind me of my misfortune. FML
Today, It was pretty nice out, so I decided to walk to work. Not twenty minutes after leaving, it started to pour. I was soaking when I got there and had to change. My boyfriend works next door, so I asked him if he could give me a ride. His reply? "Sorry Babe, I just can't be seen with you like that." FML
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Top comments
CallMeMcFeelii 14
If it was raining balls, you were officially tea bagged more than that poor girl on the bus trip.. My condolences.
DocBastard 40
Ever wonder why everyone thinks people suck? Because people suck.
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Comments (124)
CallMeMcFeelii 14
If it was raining balls, you were officially tea bagged more than that poor girl on the bus trip.. My condolences.
McAninch35 9
I love people
mif_fml 27
I hate people..
Success4444 12
I love hating people.
lilhellian 27
I hate loving people.
FredF 4
I hate myself.
sux4u121 10
I hate loving people who love hating people
gotaplanstan 28
I loving hate myself for people! wait...
PenguinBitch 44
I love myself because I have a high self-esteem and confidence is key.
countryrose92 23
I love all of you people for keeping that thread going. Yea, I know. I kinda ruined it. Now I hate myself
Jac_d_ipper 10
I love myself for hating people who hate themselves for ruining the threads of all loving people who love hating people and who hate loving people and also who hate themselves for loving the hating people...whoosh
mif_fml 27
This thread got out of hand.
monocyte 4
I love threads that go out of hand
Success4444 12
29, your comment is sad, and your picture is sad. Combined, you almost made me shed a tear!
tjv3 10
Well remember that karma is a bad bitch and that a hole will get his
newbiehere99 6
I hate threads that get out of hand because of people who love to hate people for loving people that hate themselves because of low self esteem.
Sandman366 6
The more out of hand this thread gets, the better it is.
lilhellian 27
The gods were displeased that you wouldn't lick chocolate off of his knob.. You brought this plague of balls upon yourself..
IAmJad 18
I would love an explanation because I didn't understand that one bit.
lilhellian 27
Read the earlier FML's I referenced it...
Plastic_Stitchez 25
Wrong FML bro
TheManager 6
Right FML. He was making a reference.
JenkJenks 6
Bro
CaptTeemo 10
What a nice young man.
Success4444 12
"Like a good neighbor, State Farm is there!" I guess you forgot the jingle this time. Don't forget it in case it happens again!
SqueakyChipmunk 22
But he has Geico.
Axipiter 24
Maybe that's who showed up when he sang "I have blah-blah insurance, so person come help".
GirlYouNasty 11
79: "I caught you a dollar!"
apm2629 2
then he deserves it for trading the good neighbor with the 15% off on car insurance.
PuggieKid 22
Did you flip him off?
Stalkerloo 11
Gotta love our Southern hospitality here in Texas. I'm sorry OP, quite a few of us Texans aren't very nice. Warm up as soon as you can though, don't want to get sick.
Teyros 24
Maybe he's just looking out for you, pushing you to reach your point faster. Just forget he called you an ass though. >.>
HeyHeyFishFillet 34
I doubt the he's looking out for OP, the driver is most likely just an asshole.
countryrose92 23
#69, its called Sarcasm buddy. You should learn about it. :)
thosedogtags 8
...And this is why I have no faith left for the human race. I'm sorry that you had to deal with such a douchebag.
DocBastard 40
Ever wonder why everyone thinks people suck? Because people suck.
SqueakyChipmunk 22
Yeah, we do suck.
lilhellian 27
^But you're a chipmunk! .-.
SqueakyChipmunk 22
I CAN DREAM, HAROLD!
EpicSquishii 21
37- Thanks for making my morning! XD
Fmeonce_shameonu 15
I don't suck..I lick. Just saying.
KainMoogle 21
Dracula don't suck, Dracula scrape and lick!
SqueakyChipmunk 22
What kind of balls? Cheese balls? Dodge balls? Golf balls? Actual balls? Oh god...
VannahJane 17
All balls are 'actual' balls
YBae 27
Pokéballs...?
InfamousLastWord 9
Pool balls?
ManInTheMachine 20
Testicles.
SqueakyChipmunk 22
^this.
flockz 20
IS SPARTAA!
emag_eht 18
I think OPs talking about nuts.
countryrose92 23
#94, Hazelnuts, walnuts, chessnuts or peanuts? Wait a second, I thought op said balls, not nuts. Perhaps u should read the fml again. Oh! Maybe base balls?
klutz44 28
Raining cheese balls would be amazing.
kozzard 17
Dragon Balls
Ajwc101 24
Soccer balls?
itsjusyme 11
The General person has no purpose in life, so they find happiness in other people pain, in history we have seen people like this hitler comes to mind!
DocBastard 40
Wow, you must be Super Assumer - the superhero that's able to leap to giant stupid conclusions in a single bound. Did you really just compare a simple asshole to Hitler?
Mr_Satan 11
I dunno doc, anyone who would abandon someone to a torrent of balls is definitely an upper level asshole
gotaplanstan 28
I'd say Hitler was more comparable to a complex asshole.
OptimusVader 23
Schadenfreude!
countryrose92 23
18, you made me laugh. I might steal that quote sometime, hope u don't mind. :)
bReLiNg 18
I'm sorry OP. Some people are just plain asses. They get enjoyment out of it- I do not know why.
XxKillerStormXx 13
I agree